To find lazy adults really grating?

[myothersockis]

I am well aware that I may sound like a massive bitch here.

I have a friend who is very lazy. She would rather be up until 2/3am on social media and sleep in until 10am everyday. We are late 20s. All she does is go to work (she’s a nursery assistant, fair play that’s hard work but still), and then come home and sit in bed. She ridicules me for going to the gym, running, having hobbies. She thinks it’s all a waste of time. She purposefully chooses 11-5 shifts so that she can lay in bed all morning.

It grates on me so much. I’m very much a morning person and while I understand not everyone is, I think it’s a pillar of being an adult that you’re out of bed by a reasonable time, even on the weekends. She’ll often text and say that she’s still in bed at 3pm. No mental health issues, just laziness.

AIBU to find this really grating?

Maybe the friend earns 200k and already has all of those things.

She is immature.

It’s just a fact. Mature adults don’t stay in bed all day, work 5.5 hours a day and claim it’s full time and hard work.

She doesn’t. Minimum wage. At home with her parents.

It was the OP who is raising it to the level of a virtue, not you.

I think you have become a bit overly-defensive because you enjoy going to the gym - which, make no mistake, I am sure all of us think is absolutely fine - so long as you own it for what it is: a choice in the way you spend your time that isn't necessarily how everyone else would choose to go about keeping fit and healthy.

We are all free to make our own choices without people like the OP condemning - and there will be a variety of views about what is more productive than something else and the best way to spend one's time. That's what makes us all different.

Or it will be the opposite.

Why is an extrovert more likely to buy a house and car than an introvert?

OP has not said which one of them gets paid the most but she has said that she has a lot of hobbies that cost money, whilst her ‘friend’ doesn’t.

The friend is much more likely to be able to buy a nice home in the future by not spending all of her money.

Exactly. Going for a few runs hardly balances out spending most of your waking hours stuck in an office.

As long as she doesn't develop a shed load of health problems from inactivity that require tax payer intervention and she can afford her lifestyle on. 30 hours work with absolutely no government help...

And based on this thread, it’s a fact that you are unpleasant. I’d rather be immature.

You sounds a right exhausting judgemental madam.
I'm successful in my career and have done lots of additional courses
My secret??
I do my best work between 11pm-5am and then sleep 6am to 3pm when I was on study leave/ days off/ weekends
It's almost like people have different circadian rhythms

You aren't friends.
Move on.

OP have you ever worked in early years? I have done many different things in my life, but working in a nursery was the most exhausting thing I’ve ever done. It is incredibly rewarding, but very long hours and is both very physically and emotionally draining. Stop judging her until you’ve walked a day in her shoes.

Mature adults don’t judge and bitch about friends on internet forums (surprised you even had the time to come on here and start this thread!)

Just cut off the friendship and get on with your superior, grown up and better life. Clearly you two are not compatible.

Mature adults don't come on internet forums and peer down their noses at people in the way you do

Why? Because it doesn't align with your narrative that early risers can be the only ones who are successful?

To be fair her family bankroll her at the moment but that can’t last forever! She’s going to end up obese and on benefits but who cares 🤷🏻‍♀️ her problem!

Yeah the moral " laziness" police are often tucked up by 9.30 or 10pm.

Some of us are still working at that time do if. We are not up at the crack of dawn doesn't make us lazy

An adult is a developmental stage, just like a toddler.

She is a mature adult where you like it or not.

As someone who has spent years working in prisons with murderers, rapists and gang members, for double the hours she does - I can categorically tell you that you could not pay me to work in a nursery.

I love young kids but 1 hour feels like the equivalent of 5 hours and I can’t imagine looking after multiple kids every day, especially someone else’s.

I can definitely see why she is so exhausted to do much else.

Your job is obviously much easier than hers so you have the energy to do extra things.

See Op this is why you are getting a hard time: your thinking and attitudes are narrow and entirely inflexible - not to mention judgmental.

How could you possibly know any of that post was bollocks?

I've done some work, paid bills, ordered the groceries, and dealt with admin relating to my elderly mum's care this morning - all from bed as my pain issues are flaring today. Someone pass OP the smelling salts (and slip her a chill pill while they're at it)...

You won't give us any examples of what these so-called judgements to you are, so I would assume she is saying things in response to your unsolicited comments about her lifestyle.

Some do and it is NONE of your business. End the friendship although I'm astonished she hasn't done so already

You're a nice friend aren't you?

If these judgemental comments even exist…