I broke DS tablet wwyd?

[Thenonstopcleaner]

Long story short DS got a tablet for Christmas. His behaviour changed over night he became nasty smashing things lashing out. Completely different child! Half term last week he covered the garden in fence paint and the kitchen and also himself whilst I went to the toilet. When I came back and seen what he had done I lost it with him I threw his tablet and it smashed. Since then it’s been peaceful and his behaviour is getting much better.

The only issue is DH parents got him the tablet for Christmas and DS went and told them. They said to ds I need to apologise and replace it but we won’t be doing that. Should I just give them the money? DH also thinks it’s disrespectful but also agrees we’re not replacing it.

wwyd?

What's the difference between watching things on the laptop compared to the tablet?
Is the issue here that the grandparents bought the tablet without mentioning it and DS liked it so much you were angry about it for that reason?
I think as you broke it you should be giving him something to replace it and making it clear to the grandparents what you have done. If you don't want him to have the tablet then it's fine to say he's a bit young so instead I have bought him a swing for the garden instead to keep him active.
Though as others have suggested maybe there is more to this whole situation - you are not well,which can make the whole childcare situation harder so is he acting out because he is bored, wants attention, not being given much to do (e.g. was the tablet time unlimited as it was more convenient initially).

Tell your in-laws that you will replace it with an item of similar value but he is not to have a tablet. Explain clearly why you are not allowing a tablet and draw a line under it.
Get him a bike, or scooter, trampoline, Lego...

And yet I turned out fine. Far better than many of my fellow Gen Z’s who get anxiety ordering pizza because their parents were wetwipes obsessed with feelings and let them sit in front of a blue rectangle for their every waking moment.

I suspect she isn't supervising very much at all. Bit longer than a toilet trip.

I find that ridiculous honestly. And so irresponsible. There are all sorts of things you could have done including giving it back to them & explaining your reasoning or selling it.

My 4 year old uses her cousins tablet sometimes and it turns her into a completely different child. It’s wild. She’s normally calm and happy and any time she has it she has multiple meltdowns when her time is up.

I get that they want you to replace it but you get to decide if he has it or not

I'd have taken the tablet away too. Get a replacement gift. Tell grandparents that it is up to you to decide if a toy is harming your child and their father as grees in this case.

Behaviour like your son's isn't at all unheard of with devices. It's a kind of withdrawal.

You could have done what we do and only access to certain programmes? Tablets aren't always bad. Everything in moderation.

Giving it back would have resulted in an insufferable argument with the mil which I didn’t have the patience for. Sure probably could have sold it I was 18 when ds was 2 so you’ve got to give me a break though

Could even have sold it and got some shopping.

A four year old doesn’t need their own tablet but they do need a level of supervision and engagement.

I wouldn’t replace it but I wouldn’t have smashed it up either, your behaviour was bad reacting to his bad behaviour. His bad behaviour may or may not be related to the tablet as it sounds like he lives in a bad tempered environment. 🤷‍♀️

I would have taken it away, dropped it at the charity shop.

He’s 4, fgs, see a therapist.