I broke DS tablet wwyd?

[Thenonstopcleaner]

Long story short DS got a tablet for Christmas. His behaviour changed over night he became nasty smashing things lashing out. Completely different child! Half term last week he covered the garden in fence paint and the kitchen and also himself whilst I went to the toilet. When I came back and seen what he had done I lost it with him I threw his tablet and it smashed. Since then it’s been peaceful and his behaviour is getting much better.

The only issue is DH parents got him the tablet for Christmas and DS went and told them. They said to ds I need to apologise and replace it but we won’t be doing that. Should I just give them the money? DH also thinks it’s disrespectful but also agrees we’re not replacing it.

wwyd?

they should stay out of your business whether they agree with it or not.

You’re telling him not to smash and damage things, by smashing and damaging things?

How often do you smash things?

How old is he? Is his behaviour always likely that? You should replace it as you deliberately smashed it. But your ds was a little git behaviour wise and his behaviour doesn’t deserve it so I would say you’ll get a new one but he’s got to sort out the damage he did.

Learned behaviour, perhaps…

You need to replace it and give a huge apology for losing your temper. However, that doesn't mean he has to have free access to it. Reintroduce it with strict limits, making it clear that behaviour changes will be met with a reduction in tablet use.

I would give DH’s parents the money back for the tablet, and tell them they need to stay out of your parenting decisions.

Im not at well at the moment so it’s multiple things built up I don’t smash things repeatedly. He never seen me throw it.

Wow no offense but if you threw his tablet and smashed it then his behaviour issues are not caused by the tablet. My kids have driven me to distraction over the years ive never smashed anything, ever. Get anger management, replace his tablet and set limits on its usage.

There has been so many textbook outrageous/controversial posts.

I don’t want the tablet back at all he’s too young for it. I have a lot of addiction in my family and the way he was behaving was reminding me of my addict brother.

Is my post that outrageous? 🤣

Either pay the costs to the grandparents and tell them exactly what problems the tablet caused (so they don't buy a replacement) or replace the tablet with a different toy that you know your child will enjoy (still telling the grandparents why).

Blaming your addict brother for your poor, impulsive and childish behaviour is probably quite typical behaviour from you.

I can't believe you smashed up his stuff because he smashed up your stuff.

You do know you're supposed to act better than your 10 year old don't you?

The tablet seems to be the least of your worries OP.

How old is your child? Yes too much screen time can cause problems but I don't think many children change overnight from well behaved to outrageous behaviour or the other way around. I would think there is something else going on

Obviously you shouldn’t have smashed it. But obviously you shouldn’t replace it either!

I would return the money to them or buy a replacement gift. See which they’d prefer.

Make it clear that he’s not to have tablets or similar tech because it’s harmful to him.

How old is he? I can't believe that it is just the tablet that is causing this change in his behaviour. Many children have tablets and don't behave this way.
Did you monitor what he was looking at on the tablet? Restrict access etc? No child should have unrestricted access to the internet.
Breaking the tablet was a very extreme reaction and I can understand why his grandparents who paid a lot of money for it are upset.

Also if he is too young for a tablet how has he got access to garden paint in order to do that much damage whilst you pop to the toilet

Nope it was all the tablet it’s was taking over our life. You could take it off him and he would beg and cry for hours damage things. So I’m glad it’s gone feel like we have our little boy back.

I let him use my laptop now to watch his videos and it’s much better as he doesn’t want to stay on there for a long time. When I tell him to come off he is listening too.

If you had taken the tablet away, this wouldn’t be a problem.

its the smashing the tablet that must be rectified. You need to show your child that behavior is unacceptable. How? I have no idea.

“They said to ds I need to apologise and replace it but we won’t be doing that. Should I just give them the money?”

I know imagine you apologise to your child because you were a shit parent. Poor kid

Confess to your DS and apologise.
Explain to the GPs and offer to refund or buy a replacement gift. If they give another tablet, confiscate and return it.
Ideally, they/you should put the cost of the tablet in a savings account/shares ISA. It will do your DS more good in the long run.

I don't see why you should give the grandparents anything - it was gifted to your son - why would they get the money back? I can understand them being upset and I'd have a conversation with them acknowledging that you were in the wrong for smashing it and acknowledge their frustration. Whether you replace it is up to you - if it's causing that big of an issue with your son then you certainly don't have to. Perhaps you could buy him something else to play with - open ended toys like connex tiles could be a good idea.
And please be kind to yourself - You're only human and everyone loses their shit sometimes. Perhaps use this opportunity to reflect on what was building up and how you can find healthy outlets so that you don't blow.

No I said we wont be replacing the tablet. Of course I apologised to my boy.