What is the wankiest thing you’ve seen your ex do?

[Magpiesinthegarden]

That made you think - what a knob! And that you are well rid of them!

lighthearted thread -

I’ll go first -

Recently my ex changed his profile picture to this wanky AI generated image of him in the middle with a halo and two angels either side… he actually gave himself a halo 🤣 What a knobhead! Like he was Jesus 😳(He was a massive narcissist. My ex. Not Jesus)

What are the wankiest things your ex has ever done?

Full on argue for a 5 whole minutes at a festival breakfast kiosk whilst 50 people queued behind us - trying to convince the server to give him bacon instead of egg in the £5 egg roll special (the bacon roll was £6.50)

What. a. knob.

A month after I dumped him, changed his ever-blank whatsapp profile pic to a photo of him aged 30.
Hes 46.

This one is a friend's ex. Total narc, shagged another woman because he felt he wasn't getting enough attention. When his wife decided to forgive him he said no thanks I'd rather get divorced as it had given him a taste of living like a single man. 3 kids who he then barely saw because he was off clubbing, travelling and dating. Hid money during the divorce and crowed about it to mutual friends. This was all ok though as he "deserved to be happy".

He then wrote a book on "mindfulness". I read some extracts (for free on the internet, had no intention of buying it). It was the biggest load of self indulgent wank I've ever read. He also claimed his ex wife was the narcissist and emotionally abusive - she's one of my best friends and nothing is further from the truth. Strangely the book totally omitted his own behaviour detailed in first para above.

Just been slightly sick in my mouth. 🤮

We've all been there🤣 mine was worse than yours if imagine so think how that makes me look😂

Added a photo of a pig to my contact details so when I rang him, a picture of a pig came up, not only on his phone, but also on the screen in the car. So if I rang him while the children were with him, they would see the pig picture attached to my name 😔

He became such a far right abusive troll he got banned from Twitter / X, which given the general appalling sewage scum environment on Twitter is saying something

Is that you Ivanka?

I actually didn't know that was possible. How the fuck do you manage that on that cesspit?

Sorry, I’m lol

😂

About to go on holiday. Asked then DH to make sure everything in the house is switched off, meaning TV etc. How was I to know that he would switch off the freezer as well.....
1 week later🤢.
He tried to blame it on the family pet🤷

On his weekend with them ,bring the DC into my workplace because he couldn't find a hairbrush to brush their hair and knew I would have one with me.

Get lost at every sports day and parents evening or expect me to tell him where to park.

Top shelf a*hole behaviour. Very abusive - I hope you are enjoying the relief of not being with someone that mean any more.

My friend's ex had an affair, then left to live with the OW. Rarely saw his son, never paid CMS - lived abroad or worked, cash in hand, for the OW's company. Always lived well, nice cars etc while my friend scraped by, working all the hours she could, to support their child. 15 years later friend's father died and the ex immediately sought legal advice as to whether he could claim a share of her inheritance.

My God my ex was a wanker. One day, just before we broke up, we were both sitting in the living room, him in a chair farthest in the room so that he had to walk past me to walk out of the doorway. He got up and started giving me what he imagined was a look of hatred. He was walking slowly across the room, twisting his neck as he walked so that his face was fixed on me, while giving me this 'evil' stare. I was watching him bemusedly. He really did look like a wanker, walking slowly and deliberately with this 'hate' look on his face, staring at me. It's quite hard to describe but It was pathetic, I was nearly laughing. A grown man giving the 'evils' to a grown woman. Dick.

Fucking superb !!I actually squealed laughing at this x

Refused to have our son for a couple of hrs so I could be with my dying dad, because " I've got work in the morning".
When I told him the hospital had rang and I needed to be there NOW he simply said "no" and put the phone down.

After a few frantic calls I managed to get a sitter for my son and raced to the hospital... 15 mins too late. 30 yrs on I will never forgive him and our son can't stand him. Luckily he lives on a different continent now, so I'll never have to bump into him.

This is up there with the best/worst 🤣

Mine made a complete photograph album, filled with photographs of himself, from birth to what was then the present, telling his life story.

It had all his school photos, photocopies of his school reports (average) and him in the school football team (third 11, not even captain) On his first day at work, posing with his car, and on a lads holiday. Some just looking moodily into the camera..... And gave it to me as a present.

What a prick, and also what a fucking idiot was I? I still married the wanker.

Some other highlights, he went to sleep in a waiting room miles away from the labour suite, when I was having our first baby, the staff couldn't find him. He didn't appear again until 10 minutes before she was born. He then fainted at the sight of blood.

After we split up, he asked me to write out the recipes for his favourite meals so his new girlfriend could make them for him. To which I very unreasonably replied 'Fuck off.'

He informed our son, then aged about 13, that his new girlfriend let him do anal.

He invited himself to my Nan's funeral, stuffed his face with the buffet. This was years after we'd divorced. When I said it was a bit inappropriate, he looked very hurt, and told me that my Nan, was very fond of him, and she'd want him to be there. No you delusional cockwomble, she was a lovely, polite lady, who just never told him what she really thought of him.

Thank you, this has been cathartic.

😂😂😂 To the baby putting his dummy in her mouth….i LOVE it x

On a double date with his sister, stopped at maccas for lunch on way home, he knew i didn't have any money, he bought a shed load food for himself and neither bought nor offered to buy anything for me. His sisters bf noticed and bought my meal.

By being a non stop wanker to other users I guess. Slightly creepy comments to women who were probably half his age, followed and followed by huge amounts of porny and far right accounts. Don’t know what he did specifically but my guess is personal abuse over definitions of war crimes in Gaza or something. Endlessly copy pasting the same comments like calling people an Cnut or hard of understanding. Also - he PAID for a blue tick prior to getting banned. Wanker.

Wow, I think you win! But that comment to your son 🤢

Made us our evening meal for the first time in 2 years that we were together, even though he was a chef. Piled his plate high and gave me what can only be described as scraps. After a few mouthfuls announced he didn’t think he would be full at the end of the meal so could he take some from my plate. I said no because I’m eating but he could have what I left, reminded me that he is a man not a dog so would need more than leftovers.

I had a couple more forkfuls and said this isn’t very nice thinking about it so you finish mine and I will make myself something better. He looked devastated, we only lasted another week but it was probably the most delicious thing I tried, obviously I would never tell him this.