To think parents are not teaching any independence?

[MrBlobbysNuts]

A local parent group is in uproar because their precious secondary school children are apparently "too vulnerable" to get the bus before and after school without a phone (phones have been banned from premises entirely)

How is getting a bus for 15 minutes without a phone unsafe? Back in the day we just had ourselves and we survived. Give the kids cash and teach them to stop relying on phones to get around. The world is no more dangerous than it was 40 years ago, if anything it’s much safer!

I think all the people saying you can brick but not a smart phone, whilst I do need my phone for making / receiving calls most of the things that I am reliant on my phone for is internet/apps - online banking /payments, multi factor authentication, receiving notifications from school/nursery etc, checking train times, calendar and emails.

Oh so you only have experience in forums? All righty then. I have experience from real life students and parents

If it was urgent wouldn't you call a neighbour? I used to phone my parents at work too although obviously I didn't if I was just going to be a bit late as they wouldn't be at home to notice.

That was the norm then but I think parents expect a different level of communication these days given the ease of it. Of course we can go back to before but it requires an expectation and mind frame shift from parents.

At 16 I walked home from my job in the next village along a road without houses. I got attacked by a group of boys throwing stones. I remember being terrified. If I had a phone I could have called for help

The internet is a very powerful tool used correctly. Why would you not want your child to have access to it?

On a family laptop in the living room so you can see what they're doing and limit the time they spend doing it. That always used to be the recommendation.

Know teen is going to be late and not panic and ring school - that may apply if other people like siblings are in the house expecting teen back as well.

Use pay phone someone known to family who does drive to give a lift.

Phone someone to help them work out if there is another way back bus etc.

Yes there will be situations where there no-one in the house- no siblings - no-one in area to phone for a lift and parents at work with no phone access or to far to help - at which point the pay phone not being there is irrelvant.

Though smart phone is still useful as taxi apps can then be used - as DD1 had to do when both buses were out due to strikes and train due to damage to line.

I was in that situation at secondary school bus not turning up - few years in it was easier as out of town shopping center before last most dangerous mile and half got built with phone banks there. Mum wasn't always home and even when she was didn't always have the car but she still liked us to phone as did younger sibling. Plus if there was a group of peers could sometimes cadge a lift of someone else's family member who got called to get back to the village quicker. Worse case buses every hour started to leave from the center as well so could wait for those.

Prior to shopping ceneter we had to walk all way back with no phone on route and school reception already being locked. The unlit junction in winter just before village was dangerous - it's actually much worse now with increase in traffic.

I think being able to contact the parent is often more the benefit of the parent than the child. Most of the time the child would not be asking for help because they had missed the bus. They would just be letting the parent know. Nothing to do with not being independent.

I'm not sure my parents " worried" as they wouldnt know if shock horror i would miss a bus. Simply would've expected to sort it out ourselves likely by walking

Probably easier not to worry when there no unlit country roads with a junction just before village notorious for a high death and accident rate on route back. I think that why many parents in my village did worry even in 90s. So they did give us lifts when they could when bus didn't turn up.

I think it's context - a safe route with lots of alternative transport back is going to be less of a worry if bus is missed than one when it's only one bus and the roads aren't safe for walking back.

Err my son graduated last year. So I have experience from him. Why would I k ow about other parents irl?

Well it parents didn't have a car so it would've been bloody impossible for them to give me a lift

I had a 21 yo at work asking me how to dry his hands without a kitchen towel.
I work in tech and he was a software engineer intern.

And if parents are at work they are unlkely to even know the teen is late are they? I finished school at3.15 pm, theoretically home by 3.r5.

But often went straight out with mates etc. As long as I was home before 5.45 when dad returned from work he wouldn't know if id arrived at 3.45 or 5.40

And surely you'd teach kids alternative routes/ options. Before They start secondary school

Even if I did phone a neighbour do you expect them to sort it?

My mum asked me recently if i remember the school trip where my bus broke down when I was about 6yo. I did.

What I didnt know... the parents had absolutely no idea where the bus was. The school didnt either. The first bus got back an hour late, and told the other parents... that bus was going back to pick up the rest of the children.
My mum was at home, as she had picked up my brother and my friends sister... friends mum was dropping me off.

Apparently my Mum just presumed I was safe as I would be with friends mum/teachers.

It was a completely different time.

How do they get a bus ticket without a phone though? Ours are all on apps not paper tickets.

Our school also makes a big song and dance about not having phones then outs all the homework in an app which they need to access from their phone, ditto all information and how the pay for lunch….

Because parents talk to each other. I know parents at my son's college, I know they didn't get help filling in the uni applications. Funny how you suddenly have info from your son when you only mentioned forums before.

Tell the parents child will be late - maybe let someone who drives go there drive past and pick them up.

I don't have a car but me and the kids know people who do drive - and we can arrange taxi and ubers these days often from smart phones.

I aslo lived in 90s in a rual location - with a hour bus service with huge gaps and a dedicated school bus that wasn't as reliable as it should have been- I can't image what alterniate arrangments to get home you think could have been made. With DD1 at college it was a perfect storm both train and buses out and us not driving her best bet was a taxi which she ordered by herself with her smart phone.

I don't get your posts - we live in a world were mobiles are now expected to travel around. The harking back to some imagined past is coming across as more 4 yorkshire men sketch than any real point.

My kdis bus did get badly delayed on a school trip - a text was sent to parents to pick up around an two house later tahn palnned- I wasn't worried but did appreciate knowing as could change plans accordingly for pick up - too young according to school to walk home themseleves.

Why would they need to sort it out? They could just let the parents know.

Ring doorbell or equivalent enables the parent to see if the child has arrived home, even when they aren’t there

Not in the bloody 80s it didn't lol. And not everyone has one now either.

Are the parents at work then checking doorbell notifications lol

Like how? Parents are at work. How's the neighbour going to let them know?

Honestly are people really dense here? When is started secondary school in 1982 ( ignore the fact id took myself to primary and back on bus / train before that) we didn't have a house phone, a car and my ( single parent) dad was at bloody work

Yet people going on about phoning neighbours, using call boxes and even better parents checking on the " ring" bell.

Strangely enough I'm nearly 5t and managed to cope. Even taking ages to get home at times as spent bus fare on other stuff so had to walk it get a " backie" on someone's bike

Your kids are capable of a lot more than many parents give them credit for if they are taught well and not over protected

What actual percentage of kids travel to very rural areas on an unreliable bus daily.

The greatest majority won't and the parents are far more likely to have cars in that scenario living in the back of beyond

And as for the school trip scenario, of course one of the teachers should have a phone with contact numbers / Whatsapp for the parents.

I don't however remember my DDs school taking them on a trip and so e ,A level students attended ( year 12) . Got the " late" text myself DD pointed out that I wasn't coming to fetch her any ,BECAUSE SHE HAD HER OWN BLOODY CAR parked at the school.

So some infantilisation was being done by the school also ( bearing in mind she could've left school by then

I can see how that works in a primary school but not in high school where they don't have the same room all day. We have boxes too for when pupils get them out but they tend to outright refuse to give up their phones and say it's against their human rights!

I meant if the parents were at home obviously.🙄 If the parents were at work then there might be no need to phone them if just going to be late home. I actually started secondary school in the 70s and definitely would be in contact with my parents if missed the school bus. I also would phone my mother at work to ask her if she could pick me up on the way home (and probably some of my friends) if there was a problem with transport. Just because you didn't contact your parents it does not mean everyone else was doing the same thing! It's not necessarily anything to do with kids being capable either. It could be just so their parents don't worry.