To not take any conception now I’m 40

[68days]

I’m 40 in late July and have been talking about with dh not using condoms or any other form of conception anymore

Um yeah no. I speak with confidence that you are taking a huge and unnecessary risk there. I wish someone had bluntly advised me when I was 42!

Unless of course you would welcome a pregnancy - in which case I wish you luck 🌻

What is behind your thinking - you want more children or you think your fertility is low enough at 40 not to bother with contraception?

The second is categorically untrue. I am 48 and my GP advises I continue using contraception until well over 50.

I doubt OP is coming back.

Op isn’t coming back and probably never intended to

@Rumplestiltzit makes a lot more sense to not get pregnant if that’s not what she wants.

I agree. It is. To have a baby anyway. I know most women have their first baby at 42-43 on Mumsnet (and so does everyone in their 'social circle,') and then have another one in their mid 40s, and then one at 50!

But in the real world, the average age for a first time mum is 30 (in the UK.) Average age of the last baby is usually 33-34. In the real world women having babies in their 40s are the exception rather than the rule.

Maybe she's busy brushing up on her basic biology and/or literacy?

I don't need to 'check my maths.' Children are at school until they are 18, so many women having a baby at 42 would have a child still at at school, when they are SIXTY! They will be leaving soon sure, but many of these children will be financially dependent on their mother/parents until the parents are nearly 70. (Or older.) Call me picky, but my dream retirement plan is not having teenagers in my 60s, and them still living with me - and me supporting them til I am 70 or older.

.

My dream of having two children was much more important to me than any dreams about retirement. People won't get the state pension till about 68 anyway, if we're expected to be capable of working I'm sure we can also parent

I'm 38 and was told I would be more likely to get struck by lightning than fall pregnant naturally again due to age and infertility.

I'm currently 32 weeks pregnant, so........

It's actually not. I had my last baby at 41. My twin cousins had their first babies at 43 and 44 and I currently have two friends pregnant at 42.

It's actually more common now. The average age increases all the time.

Gosh if you want more babies carry on. Until your periods stop, there is always a risk!

What are your reasons for not using any anymore? You're actively discussing trying for a baby then.
Or playing roulette, risking it.
Seeing if you get lucky or not.
As just because you're over 40 doesn't mean you still can't get pregnant. Ok, it's harder to, but still perfectly possible.
I'm late 40s and hopefully can't get pregnant again, but there's no way I'd be risking it 😁

Lucky you. Many women struggle to concieve and so it is either a baby at 40 or no baby.

44 year old me here with natural twins! I’m exhausted!! Brace yourself 🤣

Goodness me I will have an 18 year old at SIXTY. What will I do 🤣

And in my 70s hopefully my children won't be financially dependent on me considering they will be in their thirties.

Honestly, the ignorance around women’s fertility is embarrassing. We don’t suddenly become infertile at 40. I’m 46, and if I was sexually active at present, I would not be taking any chances.

Quite, I found myself an accidental parent again at 42. No regrets at all but it’s absolute nonsense to think you won’t conceive after 40. I know plenty of people who have and sometimes the other side of 45 🤷🏻‍♀️

Same! I’m delighted to be honest, he’s a great kid!

I was classed as medically infertile - and I fell pregnant naturally at 47!

Enjoy your pregnancy cos it’s probably gonna happen

No it really isn't.

My dgm - babies every 2 years from 22 to 44, obviously before the pill.
My dm, babies at 28, 30, 34, 38, 42, 44
Me, baby at 45 on one tube and half an ovary
Dsis1 - babies at 28, 34, 41
Dsis2 - babies at 24, 26, 41, 43
Dsis3, baby at 41
Dsis4, babies at 37, 39

Maternal cousins are the same.

@zov You may be from a family with short lived fertility but my family doesn't have any issue conceiving in our late 30s and 40s. For us it is normal. Most of us can get pregnant sitting on a warm cushion and it isn't funny, so we all double up on contraception, and don't stop taking it until periods have stopped for a year.

Congratulations on your decision to start a family. I hope that goes well for you. I had my second at 37 and third at 43 so you may well have plenty of time!

Unless you are post menopause, i.e. not had a period for a year, you can still get pregnant.