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Original poster

To have done a job interview at 20 weeks pregnant and not disclosed

532 replies

Kinekia · 29/05/2026 18:47

I’m 25 weeks pregnant.

My original manager knew from 6 weeks in January as HG (severe morning sickness) kicked in at 6 weeks and I ended up on the sick for 2 months. After 2 months I returned as I’d found a medication protocol that allowed
me to get back to normality. I worked in an entry level customer service role. They have dozens of staff so my pregnancy didn’t really affect the team that much.

An internal role came up within the business in March. It would essentially be a promotion. Pay rise, more responsibilities (but generally nicer hours and less front-line customer contact, which is a huge bonus), no weekends, smaller team. I applied expecting nothing to come of it. I surprisingly got invited for an interview in April. I was 20 weeks when I interviewed. I had pondered over whether to disclose the pregnancy at the interview. This internal department is in a different part of the building to where I worked so they don’t know me at all. And my line manager at the time confirmed they wouldn’t tell them about the pregnancy and that it was up to me when I disclose. This job role that had come up was something I’ve desired to get into ever since joining the company, and I really wanted to give it my best shot, so I decided not to disclose, as was my legal right.

I interviewed at 20 weeks in April and felt I hid the bump well. We clicked really well at interview and they really liked me. They asked about pre-booked holidays etc. they then asked “Is there anything else we need to know about?” and I cheerfully said “no”. I felt awful about this at the time but on the other hand, as I said, I wanted them to review me as a candidate fairly without just being seen as “the pregnant candidate”.

Middle of May I got offered the role and accepted. The call where they offered the role was very rushed as they were snowed under, and I didn’t get chance to disclose the pregnancy as she said “Right I’ll be in touch when I’ve got a start date I need to go now, take care!” and abruptly hung up.

The next day (my final day before 17 days of annual leave) I messaged the new manager asking if she had time for a call and she never replied. I wanted to disclose the pregnancy then. I then went on the pre-booked
holiday and still didn’t have a start date.

Came back from my holiday and returned to work 26th May after the bank holiday and went to sit in my usual part of the office and got pulled away by my new manager, taken to their department and told I’m starting straight away. By this point I’m 25 weeks so I had to tell them. It was all quite rushed and they’ve been off with me ever since. Nobody has said anything but they aren’t friendly with me like they have been prior and at one point I was asked why I hadn’t disclosed at interview. They exclude me from friendly chat and I have to ask them what they want me to be doing with my time and my training.

I do feel awful for inconveniencing them but I don’t think I did anything wrong by not disclosing at interview. I had intended to tell them earlier than when I did but I just never got the right moment. I thought we’d have a time to sit down together and go through contracts etc and I would’ve mentioned it then but this never happened.

I have seen there is another woman on the team who is pregnant and due to go on leave so I suspect they had intended me to take over from her and that is why they are pissed off. They hadn’t told me this at interview though. Ironically I’m actually due before this other woman so I can see why they are fuming but legally I’ve not done anything wrong. It does prove that if I’d have disclosed at interview they probably would’ve not hired me and would’ve made up a non-pregnancy related reason to justify it.

Am I am awful employee? I’m concerned that my relationship with my managers will never recover from this and it’s a shame as I really have a huge interest in this role and have every intention of going back full-time after mat leave.

OP posts:
Mischance · 31/05/2026 11:04

I apologise for inadvertently adding that word. The principle of what I was asking still stands.

OP is in a huge organisation (although that does not exempt employees from acting with integrity) but a small business could be felled by this.

TheLilacFinch · 31/05/2026 11:15

Mischance · 31/05/2026 10:35

To put another perspective .... supposing a man were being interviewed for a job and was asked if there was anything important that they should know at interview and he knowingly withheld the fact that he is about to go for spinal surgery that would put him out of action for 6 months at least. Would that be an honest thing to do? Would we be saying good for him?

It is not just about women's rights and protections it is about honesty and integrity.

This is what I think too. Anyone can be off at any time for any reason, not just mat leave.

I’ve had a colleague off for two long periods of sickness because he had to have an operation on each ankle, a colleague off for years because an operation on their shoulder was botched, a colleague off/back/off for caring for sick/elderly family members, a colleague off for months because they fell doing DIY and broke their back.

Hell one of my colleagues died on Friday morning, and that’s not the first time I’ve experienced the sudden death of a colleague!

I’ve been off for an operation for endometriosis, depression/anxiety, my mum being in the hospice and dying. Should I be disclosing that with my endo I probably can’t have kids, but if I do decide to have children I’ll need time off for IVF?

It’s actually sad to see how much women on here just hate other women.

Original poster
Kinekia · 31/05/2026 11:20

It deffo wasn’t advertised as maternity cover. The internal job posting was worded as following “We are looking for several new (insert job title)’s to join our growing department!”. The rest of the posting was then about the duties of the role. It was very much worded as if the department was as expanding. Of course if they’d have said they wanted mat cover I wouldn’t have applied, that would’ve been shameful.

OP posts:
BananaPeels · 31/05/2026 11:21

Laurmolonlabe · 31/05/2026 11:02

If the Op advances in her post after pulling this ld be astonished,you work for a business their needs have to be taken into consideration as well as your own,you can't expect to have a secure job or advancement if you purely think about yourself.

what reward would the OP have got for being honest? What payback would she have got for fulfilling her side of the bargain and looking after the business needs? Do you think they would have remember and given her a nice bonus or seek her out to give her a top job when she returned? It all seems terribly one sided.

Original poster
Kinekia · 31/05/2026 11:28

The impression I got of them during interview is that they are genuinely really lovely people who are just understandably shocked and taken aback. I really think I can come back from it with hard work and being open from now on. I’ll try to catch the woman who did my interview next week for a candid chat and I will apologise and explain my reasoning.

OP posts:
Random321 · 31/05/2026 11:31

This thread is astounding, especially on MNs where it's reasonable to assume that many posters would have experienced difficulties progressing their career due to maternity leave.

I would live to know where those telling the OP work (or are they even working) and how their own career progressed by stepping back from promotional opportunities in case their pregnant inconvienced their employer.

What's the motivation for criticising the OP? Jealous of her attitude, ability and promotion?
Being screwed over in the past?
Not progressing your own career?

There's a Daily Mail headline in this one. "Mumsnet thinks Employment Law protection for pregnant women is a load of nonsense and is unfair on employers".

ZanyUmberNewt · 31/05/2026 11:31

You might not have been 'wrong' legally but you've put them in a crap position so it's not shocking if they're pissed off.

Original poster
Kinekia · 31/05/2026 11:38

Random321 · 31/05/2026 11:31

This thread is astounding, especially on MNs where it's reasonable to assume that many posters would have experienced difficulties progressing their career due to maternity leave.

I would live to know where those telling the OP work (or are they even working) and how their own career progressed by stepping back from promotional opportunities in case their pregnant inconvienced their employer.

What's the motivation for criticising the OP? Jealous of her attitude, ability and promotion?
Being screwed over in the past?
Not progressing your own career?

There's a Daily Mail headline in this one. "Mumsnet thinks Employment Law protection for pregnant women is a load of nonsense and is unfair on employers".

Yup and they are probably the same posters that complain when mothers of young children take time out of the workplace and claim universal credit top-ups. Which would’ve been my only other option had I not gone for this promotion, because I could have never gone back to my previous role. We’re over the savings threshold for UC but only just, I’d be claiming it within a couple of months. They’d be telling me I’m fleecing the taxpayer and being a CF and telling me how it’s not their job to pay for the child I chose to have!

OP posts:
Rpop · 31/05/2026 12:05

Isinglass20 · 30/05/2026 22:57

IMO the failure to declare relevant facts which affect the business, that is, they will need to recruit someone else to cover mat leave for two employees with greater costs to the business which management will have to account for to senior management, will be viewed as misrepresentation, no matter what employment law says.

The needs of the business take priority, particularly if it is an American owned enterprise.

I wouldn’t bank on a long career in your new position……

This is the issue. Yes, the law definitely needs to protect women. However, small businesses could be fatally affected by this kind of behaviour. It’s just not ok. It’s easy to view it from an employees view. But it needs to be viewed from everyone’s perspective. I get OPs company is massive so perhaps that’s a bit less bad.

ZanyUmberNewt · 31/05/2026 12:16

Kinekia · 31/05/2026 11:38

Yup and they are probably the same posters that complain when mothers of young children take time out of the workplace and claim universal credit top-ups. Which would’ve been my only other option had I not gone for this promotion, because I could have never gone back to my previous role. We’re over the savings threshold for UC but only just, I’d be claiming it within a couple of months. They’d be telling me I’m fleecing the taxpayer and being a CF and telling me how it’s not their job to pay for the child I chose to have!

Edited
Show quote history

You don't see any problem at all in what you've done?

You'll work for what 10 weeks now? Before going on MAT leave?

Would you think it was worth training up someone in a new role for a few weeks, knowing they'll then be off for months?

And that in the time they're working, they'll need time off for maternity related appointments or they might have complications from the pregnancy and just need more time off sick/ Or just go off sick entirely.

Then someone has to fill your role while you're off. Which is usually a bit of a half-bodge job because nobody wants to get really into a role that they're only covering and there may be reasons why it's not possible to do so depending on the area of work.

And then when they come back they'll usually come back part-time and/or need adjustment time because going back to work after months off is a huge adjustment, especially when it's to have a baby.

You think you'll be raring to go and all will be fine but lots of Mums think that and come back having had a huge change of heart about working, sad and guilty about leaving their baby. Their priorities have changed and they don't see work the same way. Or they don't have an 'easy' baby and are knackered, not getting enough sleep, and aren't working up to par.

And most employers are, and should be sympathetic about that but it still puts strain on the rest of the organisation.

Then there's all the other things that also put strain on an organisation employing parents. Can't come in today because baby is ill/childcare has let us down which can't be questioned legally but also shouldn't be as employers should be adjusting for parents but still, can cause problems for an organisation.

And then there's the women who very rightly and legally, put growing their families before their employment so come back from MAT leave pregnant or plan to get pregnant with their next baby in a year or so so they have a small gap and although I completely support women in doing that, it does cause difficulties for the organisation.

bevelino · 31/05/2026 12:25

RosieSpring · 29/05/2026 19:10

You were right not to disclose , you haven't deceived anyone. Start keeping a note of anything that is happening like exclusion etc.

This

I hired a woman who was 36 weeks pregnant. She didn’t disclose her pregnancy during the interview process and I thought good for her. We hired a temp to cover her maternity leave. The employee is back now and is excellent at her job and the right decision was made.

i feel very strongly about protecting all employees in the workplace and treating them fairly; and in accordance with the law.

BananaPeels · 31/05/2026 12:33

ZanyUmberNewt · 31/05/2026 12:16

You don't see any problem at all in what you've done?

You'll work for what 10 weeks now? Before going on MAT leave?

Would you think it was worth training up someone in a new role for a few weeks, knowing they'll then be off for months?

And that in the time they're working, they'll need time off for maternity related appointments or they might have complications from the pregnancy and just need more time off sick/ Or just go off sick entirely.

Then someone has to fill your role while you're off. Which is usually a bit of a half-bodge job because nobody wants to get really into a role that they're only covering and there may be reasons why it's not possible to do so depending on the area of work.

And then when they come back they'll usually come back part-time and/or need adjustment time because going back to work after months off is a huge adjustment, especially when it's to have a baby.

You think you'll be raring to go and all will be fine but lots of Mums think that and come back having had a huge change of heart about working, sad and guilty about leaving their baby. Their priorities have changed and they don't see work the same way. Or they don't have an 'easy' baby and are knackered, not getting enough sleep, and aren't working up to par.

And most employers are, and should be sympathetic about that but it still puts strain on the rest of the organisation.

Then there's all the other things that also put strain on an organisation employing parents. Can't come in today because baby is ill/childcare has let us down which can't be questioned legally but also shouldn't be as employers should be adjusting for parents but still, can cause problems for an organisation.

And then there's the women who very rightly and legally, put growing their families before their employment so come back from MAT leave pregnant or plan to get pregnant with their next baby in a year or so so they have a small gap and although I completely support women in doing that, it does cause difficulties for the organisation.

Show quote history

Only one solution for it - women go back to the home- no work for you if you are of child bearing age.

Jamesblonde2 · 31/05/2026 12:36

bevelino · 31/05/2026 12:25

This

I hired a woman who was 36 weeks pregnant. She didn’t disclose her pregnancy during the interview process and I thought good for her. We hired a temp to cover her maternity leave. The employee is back now and is excellent at her job and the right decision was made.

i feel very strongly about protecting all employees in the workplace and treating them fairly; and in accordance with the law.

Show quote history

Doesn’t sound like you own the business you hired her for, or there was any financial impact upon you……

Lovingbooks · 31/05/2026 12:38

Kinekia · 31/05/2026 11:28

The impression I got of them during interview is that they are genuinely really lovely people who are just understandably shocked and taken aback. I really think I can come back from it with hard work and being open from now on. I’ll try to catch the woman who did my interview next week for a candid chat and I will apologise and explain my reasoning.

But why are you doing that? I don’t get your reasoning you applied got the job without disclosing your pregnancy the person who interviewed you surely knows now your in the job what are you wanting from this. You have the job so do it don’t bother with chats and HR unless you are wanting to escalate the situation.

SooPanda · 31/05/2026 12:40

Your old manager is right you had no responsibility to let them know about the pregnancy and you were sadly right to hide it, as even if you’d been perfect for the role they’d probably not have hired you. This will be an inconvenience to them for up to a year of mat leave perhaps but you could be a perfect employee for decades after that.

Also, does anyone expect men to declare that their wives are pregnant in interviews??

DontShoutInMyEarholeTracey · 31/05/2026 12:43

PropertyD · 29/05/2026 18:57

Honestly - I think you deceived them. Sorry, but it wasn’t a great thing to do.

Totally agree!
OP you should have given an honest answer when they asked if there is anything else they need to know. I’m not surprised they’re pissed off tbh.

Original poster
Kinekia · 31/05/2026 12:46

Lovingbooks · 31/05/2026 12:38

But why are you doing that? I don’t get your reasoning you applied got the job without disclosing your pregnancy the person who interviewed you surely knows now your in the job what are you wanting from this. You have the job so do it don’t bother with chats and HR unless you are wanting to escalate the situation.

Show quote history

where did I mention HR? I just want to build up the rapport with them again!

OP posts:
NNforthispost · 31/05/2026 12:46

I haven’t ted full thread but it was an internal job so same HR team which knew about your pregnancy so ……

compactmotif · 31/05/2026 12:53

ZanyUmberNewt · 31/05/2026 12:16

You don't see any problem at all in what you've done?

You'll work for what 10 weeks now? Before going on MAT leave?

Would you think it was worth training up someone in a new role for a few weeks, knowing they'll then be off for months?

And that in the time they're working, they'll need time off for maternity related appointments or they might have complications from the pregnancy and just need more time off sick/ Or just go off sick entirely.

Then someone has to fill your role while you're off. Which is usually a bit of a half-bodge job because nobody wants to get really into a role that they're only covering and there may be reasons why it's not possible to do so depending on the area of work.

And then when they come back they'll usually come back part-time and/or need adjustment time because going back to work after months off is a huge adjustment, especially when it's to have a baby.

You think you'll be raring to go and all will be fine but lots of Mums think that and come back having had a huge change of heart about working, sad and guilty about leaving their baby. Their priorities have changed and they don't see work the same way. Or they don't have an 'easy' baby and are knackered, not getting enough sleep, and aren't working up to par.

And most employers are, and should be sympathetic about that but it still puts strain on the rest of the organisation.

Then there's all the other things that also put strain on an organisation employing parents. Can't come in today because baby is ill/childcare has let us down which can't be questioned legally but also shouldn't be as employers should be adjusting for parents but still, can cause problems for an organisation.

And then there's the women who very rightly and legally, put growing their families before their employment so come back from MAT leave pregnant or plan to get pregnant with their next baby in a year or so so they have a small gap and although I completely support women in doing that, it does cause difficulties for the organisation.

Show quote history

So, to be clear, your issue isn't whether op told them she was pregnant at interview or accepting promotion whilst pregnant - your issue is with any employed woman getting pregnant at all?

You want to go back to employers being free to sack women and deny promotion and job opportunities for being pregnant?

EligibleTern · 31/05/2026 12:56

compactmotif · 31/05/2026 12:53

So, to be clear, your issue isn't whether op told them she was pregnant at interview or accepting promotion whilst pregnant - your issue is with any employed woman getting pregnant at all?

You want to go back to employers being free to sack women and deny promotion and job opportunities for being pregnant?

Show quote history

I think this is the real issue for a lot of people - that pregnancy could impact An Employer, which is somehow much worse than discrimination against pregnant women in the workplace. It's pretty worrying.

Taking issue with her not answering a question that would have been illegal if it was interpreted as referring to pregnancy makes zero sense.

Lovingbooks · 31/05/2026 12:59

This is a big company your first manager knew about your pregnancy, HR were involved then when you took sickness leave. You applied for the job got it can’t you see that you should be focusing on doing the job now. If I was your interviewer and you raised this by informal chat (apologising) I would be finding the whole thing strange and would be wondering why you are doing this now when you are employed in the job, you are complaining their demour has changed when they knew about your pregnancy this is because they thought they employed a long term staff member not someone who would be going on maternity shortly. Nothing you have said says they are discriminating against you so sorry if I’m missing the issue here.

compactmotif · 31/05/2026 13:00

Kinekia · 31/05/2026 11:28

The impression I got of them during interview is that they are genuinely really lovely people who are just understandably shocked and taken aback. I really think I can come back from it with hard work and being open from now on. I’ll try to catch the woman who did my interview next week for a candid chat and I will apologise and explain my reasoning.

I don't think that's a very good idea. It will just make it sound like you think she's being discriminatory and would have wanted the opportunity to discriminate against you/had deliberately asked an inappropriate question at interview.

I would be surprised if that achieved anything positive. It will just make you sound defensive and put her back up and make her feel accused/defensive. You don't need to justify yourself or apologise.

Just focus on doing a good job and building relationships in your new team. There have been lots of idiotic posts on this thread, don't make the real life situation worse for yourself by internalising or acting upon people's online bravado and idiocy.

ZanyUmberNewt · 31/05/2026 13:01

BananaPeels · 31/05/2026 12:33

Only one solution for it - women go back to the home- no work for you if you are of child bearing age.

Show quote history

Don't be ridiculous.

You know that's a straw man argument.

I was simply stating the challenges for employers and for employees who have to cover.

OP isn't 'wrong'. But lets not pretend that there aren't issues where people can be legitimately pissed off regardless.

OP was very open in stating she went for this job because she wouldn't have been able to continue in her previous job as a new Mum. And she has savings so she wouldn't be able to access UC straight away.

And now she's got them over a barrel legally.

It's legal but it doesn't mean people can't be pissed off by it.

In the course of my work which is NHS i've had people like OP take jobs while pregnant and not made that clear which causes problems.

Also had a colleague have 3 kids in 5 years. Twice coming back from MAT leave pregnant. Completely legal but also f-ed over the NHS and her colleagues.

She wasn't wrong in doing what she wanted but also, none of her colleagues were wrong in being pissed off.

BananaPeels · 31/05/2026 13:04

ZanyUmberNewt · 31/05/2026 13:01

Don't be ridiculous.

You know that's a straw man argument.

I was simply stating the challenges for employers and for employees who have to cover.

OP isn't 'wrong'. But lets not pretend that there aren't issues where people can be legitimately pissed off regardless.

OP was very open in stating she went for this job because she wouldn't have been able to continue in her previous job as a new Mum. And she has savings so she wouldn't be able to access UC straight away.

And now she's got them over a barrel legally.

It's legal but it doesn't mean people can't be pissed off by it.

In the course of my work which is NHS i've had people like OP take jobs while pregnant and not made that clear which causes problems.

Also had a colleague have 3 kids in 5 years. Twice coming back from MAT leave pregnant. Completely legal but also f-ed over the NHS and her colleagues.

She wasn't wrong in doing what she wanted but also, none of her colleagues were wrong in being pissed off.

Show quote history

So what if it causes problems? Women have babies. Workplaces have to work around it. They manage. They always do. Is it annoying, yes I’ve been pregnant and taken mat leave. I’ve dealt with women going on mat leave. I’ve dealt with men taking shared parental leave. I’ve worked in companies with thousands of employees and those with 5. We always managed one way or another. Just as we have managed with people getting sick, taking sabbaticals or having caring responsibilities. It is not a big deal. The OP’s workplace will find a solution to this

compactmotif · 31/05/2026 13:07

Rpop · 31/05/2026 12:05

This is the issue. Yes, the law definitely needs to protect women. However, small businesses could be fatally affected by this kind of behaviour. It’s just not ok. It’s easy to view it from an employees view. But it needs to be viewed from everyone’s perspective. I get OPs company is massive so perhaps that’s a bit less bad.

Show quote history

Do you mean that you want small businesses to be able to decline to employ pregnant women without any legal repercussions? Because I cannot see what other purpose there would be to disclosing pregnancy at interview other than to give them the opportunity to decline to recruit a pregnant woman?

I am struggling to see how you are reconciling protection for women with that stance so perhaps I am missing something.