To have done a job interview at 20 weeks pregnant and not disclosed

[Kinekia]

I’m 25 weeks pregnant.

My original manager knew from 6 weeks in January as HG (severe morning sickness) kicked in at 6 weeks and I ended up on the sick for 2 months. After 2 months I returned as I’d found a medication protocol that allowed
me to get back to normality. I worked in an entry level customer service role. They have dozens of staff so my pregnancy didn’t really affect the team that much.

An internal role came up within the business in March. It would essentially be a promotion. Pay rise, more responsibilities (but generally nicer hours and less front-line customer contact, which is a huge bonus), no weekends, smaller team. I applied expecting nothing to come of it. I surprisingly got invited for an interview in April. I was 20 weeks when I interviewed. I had pondered over whether to disclose the pregnancy at the interview. This internal department is in a different part of the building to where I worked so they don’t know me at all. And my line manager at the time confirmed they wouldn’t tell them about the pregnancy and that it was up to me when I disclose. This job role that had come up was something I’ve desired to get into ever since joining the company, and I really wanted to give it my best shot, so I decided not to disclose, as was my legal right.

I interviewed at 20 weeks in April and felt I hid the bump well. We clicked really well at interview and they really liked me. They asked about pre-booked holidays etc. they then asked “Is there anything else we need to know about?” and I cheerfully said “no”. I felt awful about this at the time but on the other hand, as I said, I wanted them to review me as a candidate fairly without just being seen as “the pregnant candidate”.

Middle of May I got offered the role and accepted. The call where they offered the role was very rushed as they were snowed under, and I didn’t get chance to disclose the pregnancy as she said “Right I’ll be in touch when I’ve got a start date I need to go now, take care!” and abruptly hung up.

The next day (my final day before 17 days of annual leave) I messaged the new manager asking if she had time for a call and she never replied. I wanted to disclose the pregnancy then. I then went on the pre-booked
holiday and still didn’t have a start date.

Came back from my holiday and returned to work 26th May after the bank holiday and went to sit in my usual part of the office and got pulled away by my new manager, taken to their department and told I’m starting straight away. By this point I’m 25 weeks so I had to tell them. It was all quite rushed and they’ve been off with me ever since. Nobody has said anything but they aren’t friendly with me like they have been prior and at one point I was asked why I hadn’t disclosed at interview. They exclude me from friendly chat and I have to ask them what they want me to be doing with my time and my training.

I do feel awful for inconveniencing them but I don’t think I did anything wrong by not disclosing at interview. I had intended to tell them earlier than when I did but I just never got the right moment. I thought we’d have a time to sit down together and go through contracts etc and I would’ve mentioned it then but this never happened.

I have seen there is another woman on the team who is pregnant and due to go on leave so I suspect they had intended me to take over from her and that is why they are pissed off. They hadn’t told me this at interview though. Ironically I’m actually due before this other woman so I can see why they are fuming but legally I’ve not done anything wrong. It does prove that if I’d have disclosed at interview they probably would’ve not hired me and would’ve made up a non-pregnancy related reason to justify it.

Am I am awful employee? I’m concerned that my relationship with my managers will never recover from this and it’s a shame as I really have a huge interest in this role and have every intention of going back full-time after mat leave.

Yes, they wanted to know, and OP didn’t want to tell them. Their wants don’t trump hers thankfully as she would never have got the job if she’d told them - they seem to have the same archaic mindset as you do!

Although you haven’t done anything wrong under the eyes of the law, would you be pissed off if you were in their position?

If it’s legally ok then it is ok. I wonder how passing a probation period will go though?

Legally you did noth8ng wrong, but you feel you did, 8 think you need to get out of that mindset ….it’ll probably sort itself out when you get back from maternity leave, I’d be pissed off with you though. A former colleague of mine announced her pregnancy on FB then got a job with a company I know well. They didn’t know she was pregnant and the timings are such she was at work in a senior role for about 7 weeks before going on maternity leave.

It really, really doesn’t work like that at my company.

You did nothing wrong.
If you told them you were pregnant you would absolutely not have got the job.

I’m sure it does unless your company is different to 99% of UK companies.

@Kinekia i have no DC so no skin in this game. But I have been a manager for decades. At one point I had an all-female and fabulous team of 8 and all of them, I shit you not, had babies within months of each other. By the time the later ones were coming back, the first ones were having their second babies. In a more recent team, the person we hired called us the day before starting to say she was pregnant. Six months pregnant. When she came back she proved to be the brilliant employee we knew she was.

So take it from me, you’ve done nothing wrong at all.

Bollocks. I refer you to my post above yours. The woman who joined us three months before giving birth stayed for five years (only left because of redundancy) and was a very trustworthy, hard working, and valued member of the team.

As SLT I asked a member of staff from another dept to apply for a role in mine. She applied, interviewed and then shortly afterwards disclosed she had just POAS, it was incredibly early days and offered to pull out of the process. It made no difference to me, I still wanted her to be on my team and I offered her the job, she accepted. You cannot know that you would 100% have been rejected due to being pregnant!
It feels deceptive the way you played it legal or not!

Well it would come out of the budget that is dealt with by the Customer Service operations manager (who is based in a completely different city) and not my line manager for starters. He is just genuinely nice, he wasn’t trying to get rid of me because of being pregnant. He knew I was a good candidate for the internal role and wanted me to have equal opportunity to the other candidates in our team that were going for it. There’s some absolutely horrendous attitudes on this thread.

OP I really wouldn’t worry about it, I worked with a girl who started over 5 months pregnant, disclosed it on the first day then worked a couple of weeks sadly had to take a month off for a bereavement then returned for a few weeks then went on maternity leave, she then returned from mat leave and disclosed she was 5.5 months pregnant again, let’s just say it didn’t go down particularly well but she came back was a hard worker and everyone quickly got over it.

Absolutely this 👏

I don’t even know if there is a probation period as it’s all been so rushed. They mentioned salary and hours during interview but beyond that I’ve just been thrown into the job and we’ve not gone over any other terms such as probation, how long training is etc

Have you not seen and signed a contract then? I assume probation etc would be in that.

It’s not an horrendous attitude, it’s reality and those of us who have been round the block a few times can see exactly what’s happened. He’s played a blinder.

You are projecting. I went for the role fully off my own back by checking the internal job postings and told him my intention to apply. He’d never mentioned it to me.

Nice of you to admit that you try to get rid of your pregnant employees though.

I’ve never done it but I’ve seen a fair few other managers do very similar things in nearly 50 years in the workplace. Nothing surprises me any more.

I’m in complete shock that anyone, and especially on a women’s forum, would think that OP has been unreasonable. Legally, and morally, she did the right thing by not telling them and it’s clear that by their reaction, she may not have got the role if she had disclosed. It’s part of the job to manage change in an organisation and by taking it out on OP they are likely breaking employment law. Your new manager needs to put in their big girl/boy pants and just deal with it…do they really expect to you to put your career on hold because they are too lazy to spend a bit of extra time finding maternity cover?

In an ideal world you could give them a friendly word to remind them of their obligations under employment law not to discriminate against women for, well, doing what many women do by having a baby. But it’s not an ideal world so I would defo write everything down and look at ACAS or get some friendly advice from people with more expertise about how to manage it.

Fair enough, I’m sure it does happen. And I apologise for being snippy. But I did genuinely work incredibly hard to get this role and it is a huge achievement for me. It deffo wasn’t a case of my manager sneakily pushing me to towards another department to get rid of me.

IMO, appropriate professional honesty (not talking about the wrong sort like oversharing, gossip etc.!) will get you further at work than anything else, because it’s still all about relationships and being trustworthy. I don’t know how things will be for you going forward, but they are already treating you differently and that doesn’t bode well. Had you been honest they might still have appointed you - you don’t know that they wouldn’t have. Also if you knew the role you applied for was covering someone else’s mat leave, then that doesn’t make much sense!
Either way, what’s done is done 🙂 They may come round, but equally they may not. Keep us updated on how things are, OP 💐

You’d be surprised how fast a large business (that started small too) can go back to being small or non-existent with ill-timed or unexpected problems! I will say that the human workforce are the biggest asset and if they are not right, no business will succeed. That’s why truth and integrity are important.

Literally just said the same thing! 💯 agree 👏

If I was the hiring manager I would be annoyed by it but I wouldn’t show it, and I certainly wouldn’t treat the pregnant employee any differently. They’re being really unprofessional to treat you badly. They need to buck up and get over themselves.