AIBU for pulling into a private drive after my car failed?

[1hatchling1fledgling]

WWYD? AIBU. In a big traffic jam on an urban dual carriageway for ages. Suddenly my entire dashboard lights up like a Christmas tree, lose power steering, brakes etc. hazards on and get my car somehow into the left hand lane and then into the huge drive of a large house. Knock and explain. Call RAC who have arrived when the husband gets home. I instantly apologise and he says “yes my wife told me that you had abandoned your car in my drive” (I’d waited in the car). “Get it moved now”. So should I have (a) blocked one lane of the road in a heatwave, (b) blocked the pavement and cycleway or (c) done what I did. Fault transpired to be alternator malfunction at low speeds. I was quite upset, but the professional and kind RAC operative was brilliant. He needed to follow me home since I had his battery. So I gave him a bottle of lemonade and a couple of ice lollies, as wearing those fluorescents on a hot day he was really suffering with the heat. Note driveway/front garden large enough to accommodate 8 cars comfortably

What if the car or or RAC leaked oil on the driveway? That would annoy me. I think you YANBU as you spoke to wife who said it was OK but I wouldn’t do this…

You're supposed to put the triangle 150 ft behind your car (or whatever the metre equivalent is now). And vehicles are supposed to leave a gap they can actually stop in. (Which is presumably the primary thing you were supposed to get out of the story about a commercial vehicle crashing into a object revealed when the car it was too close to swerved - heavy vehicles need much longer to stop and need to leave more room).

Anyone driving on a road without a hard shoulder should be aware that a broken down vehicle has nowhere else to go. It still doesn't belong on the pavement.

You should pull the car as close to the left hand kerb as you can, put the hazards on, get out, call 999 and stick the triangle 150 ft back if you are able to.

What the fuck is a “private family driving space”??
Are you Hyacinth Bouquet??

OP be assured, most people think you did the right thing. You inconvenienced NOBODY.

That's all well and good, but it doesn't take into account human error. So, a broken down driver can take all these precautions, and hope that every driver who encounters the situation drives safely and attentively, or they can remove their vehicle from the live lane altogether, such that there is no obstacle for other vehicles to negotiate. Now, using common sense, which do you suppose is the safer of the two options?

Trays are a thing.

Did he come out and have a go at the RAC man? No? Because its easier to try and buy a woman.
His wife was ok with it (understood your reasons), you didn't abandon the car, you stayed with it, you didn't inconvenience him as it was a multi car drive, you didn't inconvenience the rest of the traffic. The only thing was it WAS his property so suppose he has the right to say something, however as PP say what reaction would he have given a man in the same position.
My pettiness would be to send some lovely flowers/decent wine to his WIFE for kindness and understanding!!

Do you have trays for catching oil lying around? I've never seen those outside a garage workshop. I don't have one.

it was a faulty alternator if you bothered to read any of the OP's replies. That would not leak oil 🙄

you weren’t rude, he was.

She was in a traffic jam, so staying on the road and not mounting the pavement without brakes would seem far safer.

Traffic jams don’t last forever. Car brakes are hydraulic, and have dual circuits, so you’ll always have brakes unless both circuits are ruptured. What OP means is she lost power assistance for the brakes.

Traffic jams don’t last for ever (though it will be a lot longer with one lane blocked) which is why it’s appropriate to dial 999. But cars on the pavement are a hazard for pedestrians regardless of the state of traffic.

I’m not advocating for broken-down cars to mount the pavement, unless visibility was extremely limited, such as in heavy fog or a blizzard. But a private drive or similar, especially on a fast road, certainly.

I've been mainly responding emphatically about not going on the pavement. I don't think a private drive is a danger to others, and I would probably be fine with someone doing what OP did if I were the home owner. Nevertheless it's not OP's property and the road system is set up to have cars that break down stop on the road/hard shoulder/lay by/etc., not take over other people's property. It is where the car is supposed to be left in OP's situation.

I personally as do many have a private driveway as in I own the drive, the garden, the gates and everything in between. I often have my dogs out in the front garden running around or when the kids were smaller they would play on the drive so yes a private fucking family driving space for MY car and my family. I usually have the gates closed anyway but I would be very irritated with a stranger driving into my private front garden for any reason.

I'll try and remember that if my car breaks down on a dual carriageway near your home.

I think we can all appreciate that treating people's driveways as public spaces must be really annoying, but I'm really disappointed in the number of people who would be irritated by a lone woman in a broken down car and think leaving it on the dual carriage way or pavement is preferable.

There are other things to consider too. Some people have had to leave domestic abusive relationships and would be shitting themselves if a strange car pulled into their driveway and also scams that go around could be a 'lone woman' pretending her car is about to die needing to use your drive/phone/loo or whatever. That does make me sound paranoid granted but nobody knows anyone elses situations. The car should have been pulled over at the side of the road in my opinion and then AA or insurance called and not into someones driveway.

All fair points, but I'd still take my chances. Weighing up the risks of being broken down on a dual carriage way vs private drive with possible anxious resident.

You can if doing so prevents a hazardous road situation from developing.

It's the least worst option principle.

Likewise, you can swerve off the road to avoid a deer or a large item falling from a lorry in front of you.

The man was a complete tit.

That wouldn't happen with an alternator malfunction.

I’m sure they wouldn’t want to go into your fucking family driving space (again whatever that is!) but it’s extenuating circumstances!

@Witchonenowbob I only referred to it as 'fucking family' because that is what a previous poster said. And good I am glad people would not come into my private space when there are many alternatives. I can't imagine parking my car, whether it needed fixing or not in a strangers driveway. For all people know the car could have died right on the drive stopping a family getting out of their own home.

The road system is not “set up” for broken down cars to stop in the road. Vehicles which must, of necessity, stop in the carriageway, such as emergency vehicles, road maintenance vehicles, refuse lorries etc have high visibility markings and multiple flashing lights. Private cars are much less conspicuous and represent a greater danger to other road users. The safest place for them is off the road altogether, as per the Highway Code, quoted earlier.

“Many” alternatives 🤔

I can imagine taking the hump or anger over someone breaking down, I mean it’s not “parking” peeves.

Per se not peeves