DD with friend’s family for 8 hours only ate crisps

[Z0rr0]

My DD was invited to an activity with friends today. She ate a toasted English muffin before she left at 8.15. By the time she came back at 4pm she’d only been offered some crisps to eat. I’m grateful the family took her out (I paid for her ticket which was less than a tenner) and hosted her at their home, but I just can’t fathom not offering her some lunch.

Obviously this! As a parent I would not even consider staying home the entire time to host a "play date" for 2 seventeen year olds. They're essentially adults! If they'e hungry sure they'll figure out something to eat, order from any app or whatever.

At 17 I can barely remember my friends/boyfriends parents ever being home, let alone expecting them to cook and serve food. If we got hungry we just went to McDonalds or made some pasta.

I can’t get my head around that you thought this was a big enough deal to post on an internet forum

My partner used to go to his mother's most Saturdays and do errands and odd jobs for her he would be there from around 10.30-19.00 and invariably he would come back having not eaten , or been offered anything. It made me angry, I told him you head home at 4pm if there has been no offer of food, I'm not scrabbling about cooking a meal at 8pm, eventually he complied and either got fed or came home.
In fairness though , not all families eat lunch, it would seem your daughter's friend's is one of them.

Do you have teens though?

Surely there would be something in for kids' lunches? Bread? Tins of soup/beans? Eggs? etc

How weird. There's nowt as queer as folk.

While you're at it, raise your expectations of your daughter.

She doesn't need her mum to make all her food (and her friends' food).

She should be able to plan a day out with a friend on her own, including deciding where and when they will eat.

That's just mean, if no food was going to be offered the parents should have told them to buy at least a sandwich whilst out.

Wouldn't be letting her go back there again.

I was smoking weed on a beach in Ibiza when I was 17 ( sorry...couldn't resist, but genuinely true 🙂).....I was expecting DD to be a lot younger.

No I don’t have teens

Talk about infantilising two 17-year olds

OP makes it clear that they were only "out" with the parents for a couple of hours and then the 2 hung out for the rest of the time and ate crisps. The parents were not even home the whole time.

If I had taken 2 older teens out from - say 8.30-10.30am and then gone out myself I would not have considered that I needed to supervise 17 year olds making a sandwich for lunch.

I’d probably text and say ‘thanks so much she had a great time! Did she eat much at lunch? Just sorting dinner now’ and see what they say. Just to try and understand what on earth went on 😂

Sorry just seen the kids are 17?! 😂

Did you read the bit where she was 17? Why would a parent message her almost-adult daughter’s friend’s parents to thank them and to ask what she had for lunch?

Cross post!

Although given the situation I wouldn’t actually be surprised 😳🤣

I’m with you on this one OP- I’ve always got pizzas in the freezer to offer when my teen has friends round.
They may well be independent enough to see to themselves but I still always offer guests food and drink as I know teenagers aren’t the best at being hospitable!

She’s 17?? No wonder people are going off to uni at 18 with no life skills. My mum didn’t know where I was in the day at that age, let alone if I’d eaten or not, it was assumed I would sort myself out if I wasn’t around the house (it was the same with my friends and this was only 10 years ago).

So now we have men and 17 year olds who are incapable of feeding themselves without the matriarch being their to hold their spoon.

*there

I have seen so many posts infantilising 16+ year olds on here lately and find it so confusing.

I turned 16 in 2013 so appreciate it was a few years ago now but I was working weekends at that age and going to college where I had to sort my own lunch every day, shock horror! My 14 year old nephew also just got his first job working in a cafe and I hope by 17 will be able to sort out lunch for himself without relying on a friends parents all day.

I don't think I even met the parents of most of my friends throughout secondary school let alone had our lunch organised by them, dinner yes but they would have usually been at work or out themselves in the day, not home to supervise us. To be honest if they were at home, we would have probably taken ourselves out!

Toast, the answer is always toast!! ( and nutella)

Dd is 16. I would always offer something if she had friends round.

Im such a foodie and like to feed people. I would have been mortified if she was at mine and only ate crisps. However I would have also expected my own child to make them food as the host. This could be the problem, if the teenager couldn’t be bothered and the parents assumed they would sort it between themselves

You have guests and you offer food. Pretty basic, really. 🤷‍♀️

If my 17 year old has friends over she will make them stuff, it’s only a pizza or noodles or a sandwich. The parents probably thought they had fed themselves while they were out , but obviously their child was too lazy to make something so offered snacks instead . 17 🤣🤣🤣

This. I know with my DD when she has friends to visit, I have to remind her to offer them snacks and drinks. She isn't a big eater and offering food to other people doesn't seem to be on her radar. 🙄