To feel weird about being second woman on sex chair

[TheBloomingDahlia]

I don’t think I am BU but interested in whether other people would just get over it.

Been with my boyfriend for two years, we don’t live together yet and he has just got some furniture out of storage after moving house. One item that he has recently mentioned is a curvy foam chair/sofa thing made for sex. I will add a photo of similar. Although he originally bought it new I think it’s fairly likely he has had sex with his ex on it.

I am not usually jealous at all but I feel really weird about this - I guess because it’s specially made for sex? And because it’s foam I feel like if it wasn’t covered it has probably absorbed some juices 🙈. Although surely any bacteria will be dead after two years. I just don’t want to be lying on this thing knowing his ex was in the same positions, thinking maybe she was face down in the same spot and we would be basically cheek to cheek!

These feelings are all new to me as I don’t usually think about exes and I’ve never been confronted with sex furniture/toys/accessories that weren’t my own or bought new. AIBU to feel weird about this? Would you just put a waterproof sheet down and try to get over it, or refuse to use it because you don’t want to feel uncomfortable during sex?

Definitely best not to get these two mixed up. That's much more of a niche fetish. 😂

Purple stick figure gets all the fun without much work.

I agree, same with car seats, bean bags, etc. Lots of places where sex "may" have occurred with "spillages". Do people expect their new boyfriends to swap their cars when they meet, what about a second hand car that previous owners may have enjoyed some "fun" time in? One of my boyfriends had a huge bean bag (cloth covered) that we used for a bit of "fun" often and it never crossed my mind who had used it before me, likewise boyfriend's sofas, cars, etc.

I think for those of us at the more vanilla end of the spectrum, the existence of a sex chair is an indication that sex, and sexual adventure and sexual experimentation, is going to play a much more significant role in the relationship than we would want. I like sex, I think sex is very important in my marriage, I have sex reasonably often (a couple times a week), but it isn't like a shared hobby where we plan and buy equipment and push boundaries. I don't want to feel like I have to perform sex and the thought of having sex in a dedicated chair that looks as if it's made for doggy style would make me feel quite degraded. We (my DH and I) don't really have kinks (I mean, maybe he has, but they aren't part of our sex life). If someone wanted the kind of relationship in which their partner was aroused by the thought of bending over a sex chair then they want a different partner to me. And that's ok!

Ha ha the whole thing would put me off! Buying a sex chair, ick!!

Please stop saying "juices"!! 🤢😆

The bed has sheets on it.

The sex chair is frankly ick. That one looks all velvety which is going to get covered in bodily fluids. Does it not have a peel off cover for washing? Because it should ...

1. Slightly disappointed this isn’t about an actual sex swing type chair
2. Buy a black light
3. If it’s absorbable material (ie not vinyl/leather) and you can’t just get the antibac out and you’ve checked it with the black light and it makes you want to vomit then refuse to have it in the house and throw away/ don’t sit on it/don’t have sex on it* delete as applicable
4. Dont have sex on it, just so that it’s got its own, reinforced point. Especially if it’s his own home where you don’t live and have no say on it remaining.
5. Sorry, I like bullet points but it wasn’t all meant to be but seems mn does it auto and I quite like it 😄
6. Oh, and if it’s the same colour as the one in the pic then it’s not very nice anyway so just say it doesn’t suit the decor.
7. ETA, as I’ve now seen it is your house and not his (I wasn’t sure in that before) then I’d just concentrate on points 3 and 6 and chuck it!

😂

Id be mortified having the removal blokes in and seeing that!

😂

I think it is Amazon delivery responsible for these developments.

No way would my grandparents have loaded and unloaded a purchase of that doggy-style sofa into and out of their car after a visit to John Lewis.

For me it's the thought of someone saying (or implying) that "This is my sex chair that I put women over to shag" that would be a turn off.

Same

I think I’d be quite bored with the restriction of positions 😄

Well I’ve heard it all now. 😳

I’d never heard of one until this week

Many sofas and car seats are also cloth and don't have removable covers for washing.

I'd only be grossed out with either if there were obvious stains on it, regardless of what the stains were, whether sex related, or more normally just drinks or food, or even sick/urine/poo etc. You never know what previous people have done unless you buy new.

Can any sex chair users explain to me why you can't just get on your knees on a bed, or bend over a regular chair or the arm of the sofa? I suppose it can get a tad uncomfortable after a while. But how many hours are people actually spending being railed from behind that they need a piece of equipment that takes up that much space in their house?

Yes. And it is also the same profile as a scrabble tile rack. So get a couple of long lines of them and play giant scrabble.

Agreed. Major turn off 🤮

What ever happened to a bottle of wine and a negligée?

Making me laugh. Remembering a date a few years ago who bought a foam thing to try out alongside a veritable ‘tool kit.’ I kept sliding down it and giggling too much which put him off and I’m quite certain it was the wedge that never came between us in the end 😂

I’m not a user, but I recently saw an advertisement for one. I have fibromyalgia, have constant pain. I physically can’t be in one position for long, I mean both sex and normal life. My hips and lower back are definitely the ones that suffer during sex. Something like this would definitely help me.

Yes. I’d not be keen. Juices or no juices.