Catholic guilt?

[Felixfox]

I only went to catholic school for 3 years (first 3 years of school) and I am CONSTANTLY feelingly guilty . Is it the school or just me? It was a terrible place. I remember one of the fathers coming into our classroom just as a pupil was leaving as he was feeling sick. Father promptly sent him back to his desk for us all to pray, this boy was physically sick but we had to carry on with the prayer. His parting shot was a question. To a bunch of 6 year olds. Do you all pray before bed at night? We all mumbled yes. To which he replied,’Good, because otherwise you will go to hell.’ It scared the crap out of me. V complicated story with parents and my brother and I going there. My mother was a nun and left
’God will never forgive you’ and so maybe to usage some hideous and unfair guilt from that was to send us to a catholic school. The point is, I am nearly 50 and I still feel guilty all the time about pretty much anything. Will it go? I’ve tried counseling. What do I do? How do you leave a part of yourself behind?

Read the gospels. I think the Virgin Mary is mentioned...6 times? But the RC church has constructed a vast mythology around her: for eg, being assumed into heaven uncorrupted (and her girdle/belt dropping off en route to become a 'relic') etc. Her home in the Holy Land actually took flight and flew to Loreto, where it now stands too. And the fact that she acts as an intercessor between the Christian and Jesus? Where is that stated in the Bible? Loads and loads more.

The saints? Where in the Bible are the saints mentioned? Well, they're not, because by defnition they tended to be martyred Christians. But look at the whole massive mythology about saints and miracles (since Christ).

Can I mention the issue of contraception in the Global South ?

Please don’t make unfounded criticisms of institutions you know nothing about.

I have several RC and ex-RC friends and I worked for a long time in an RC School and was witness to the teaching by clergy there. I've also done an MA which involved looking at the influence of the RC church on art history (amongst other things).

Plus - I've read Marina Warner's 'Alone of All Her Sex'. I recommend it.

I think English people have some deeply weird ideas about Catholicism. I remember being very struck by Tony Blair not converting till after he left office, and realising that some of the thinking around it suggested a lot of people still see Catholics as vaguely seditious and ‘controlled from Rome’.

I’ve certainly heard much odder ideas from some C of E evangelicals.

Whatever the nuns did during my education (cradle Catholic turned atheist), at least no one expected us to think Genesis was literally true.

I don't think any of this shows that you are informed about the reality of the RC Church in the UK in 2026.

There is plenty of evidence that God exists to name a few examples: the cosmos, fine-tuning of the universe, origin of life, design in biology, the historical record of Jesus, people's personal experiences, morality, consciousness .... you need more faith to believe there is not a God than to believe there is one.

@RedTagAlan post above should have been a response to your message.

There is plenty of evidence that God exists to name a few examples: the cosmos, fine-tuning of the universe, origin of life, design in biology, the historical record of Jesus, people's personal experiences, morality, consciousness .... you need more faith to believe there is not a God than to believe there is one.

That's right.
As I understand it, though no expert, there are two strands to Christian denominations. Firstly, there are the religious texts; secondly, there is the manmade interpretation of these teachings, which changes in the light of societal changes.

None of those things require the existence of a deity ...

Please do not live your life burdened with this guilt which has been imposed by warped minds. Just get out there and be kind. If there were to be a deity who is checking your every thought and move I am sure that kindness would get its vote - or maybe not?

My views are coloured by the fact that my grandfather was an orphan and was brought up in a catholic boys home - need I say more?

Alan, I really think you don't know anything about Christianity. That's because you're stuck in your head. Christianity is not about literal facts. It's about spirituality and metaphors. I don't think you do spirituality and metaphor. You're a literal, facts are facts person.
I recommend you stop being so angry, go online and search out some good things abpout Christianity, perhaps some brave individuals llke Maximilian Kolbe, who volunteered in a concentration camp to be killed in place of another man because the other man had a family. That's was heroic and inspired by his religion, but also a bit tragic, so look at Christian charities and education and what they achieve. Ask AI what benefits a sense of religion can bring to people's lives.
Don't talk about it, just think about it. Eventually you may find yourself a little more understanding of another pov. It may make you feel calmer.

Your post almost sounds like you are making it up. I went to Catholic schools in the 80's and 90's and don't recognise this atoll. The schools were almost too lenient. I remember when I made my first confession the priest told me what I said wasn't really a sin, but to say a couple of hail Mary's anyway.

There are so many examples of christians doing wonderful things, which are sadly more than offset by them doing bad things. So the christianity is good does not hold water as a concept. It is a bit of both.

The problem with christian and other religious charities is that they carry an evangelical aspect - not quite as bad now as in the Victorian missionary era, but I think kindness should come without strings of any kind. Never fill a Christmas shoebox - they are sponsored by evangelical right wing American fundamentalists who sneak a religious tract in.

I have no problem with understanding metaphor - my problem is that religion is not taught to chidlren in that way - it is taught as fact, which is essentially dishonest.

As to spirituality - I have never yet heard a credible definition of this.

As someone who worked for a brain injury service I know what makes us who we are.

'There are so many examples of Christians doing wonderful things, which are sadly more than offset by them doing bad things.'
I don't think I could agree with that.

'The problem with Christian and other religious charities is that they carry an evangelical aspect .' Again, this is a claim but I don't agree this is always the case, or may not be bad if they do. There may well not be any strings attached.

'it is taught as fact, which is essentially dishonest.' I don't sense any dishonesty.

'As to spirituality ...'; you don't need a definition; it's an experience.

"As someone who worked for a brain injury service I know what makes us who we are." Really?😳A big claim! Most people admit the limits of human knowedge!

You've stated your subjective opinions, which is fine, but there's no evidence for them, and you haven't persuaded me of anything.

I think that works both ways!

Our brains do make us who we are. Someone who might once have been kind and thoughtful can turn into a cruel person if certain parts of the brain are injured. There are endless studies about personality and behaviour changes following brain injury. Ask the families of the victims how their loved ones can change into a different person. It is very sad, but it is a fact.

it is taught as fact, which is essentially dishonest.' I don't sense any dishonesty.

Have you ever witnessed a school RE lesson especially in religion based schools at primary level, where the teacher preface the lesson by: "This is just a story ... none of it is actually true ... but there might be interesting things we can learn from it."?
Certainly never happened in my Cof E school!

lol!! 😂 I remember making up sins to tell the priest in confession! X

You've misunderstood me. I'm saying that the strongest interpretation for these things is God. Any naturalistic explanation is theoretical and in my opinion requires greater faith than theism. For example the leading naturalistic explanation for fine tuning is the multiverse theory (entirely theoretical) which is a concept that was proposed to explain fine tuning itself. The evidence for fine tuning infers a universe extremely finely calibrated to allow the existence of stable cosmic structure and life and therefore more strongly supports a theistic explanation. As such when the other commentor stated there is no evidence for God, I gave examples which show that evidence is everywhere you look.

I am sorry about your Grandad but your understanding of Christianity is incorrect and this has led you deeper down the atheism path. Do not reject theism because you have an incorrect bias. Do not allow bias to influence your worldview towards favouring naturalism because at the end of this path lies nothing but emptiness and pointlessness. A Christian is not going to be perfect otherwise there would be no requirement for repentance. Christians try to be better and all fall short of the glory of God. Christianity emphasises inner transformation - for followers to imitate Christ so to grow in love, humility, morality and forgiveness. Christians are all on their own individual paths along this transformation journey and whilst other people may injure you or those you love, you should not let it deny you the opportunity to grow closer to God.

I think you need to spell out the connection between your post, the RC Church and guilt. It's not obvious to me at all.

I am not an atheist.

The connection lies in the fact that the OP has had guilt foisted on her by a religion that sees humans as in some way more than a collection of atoms/cells when in fact who we are and how we behave is not wholly under our control.

Lovely post, Olifleck, but your meaning may not be clear to people who are not used to this type of discussion..
Are you by any chance saying that there has to be an explanation for certain things about the world, for example the harmony and design of nature, the origin of the world, as well as the historical figure of Jesus, and people's experiences of God?
I think you may be saying that the simplest explanation for these things is that there is a God or Divine Creator.
If on the other hand, there is not God, as several posters here are asserting strongly, they you need to find another explanation, and that's very hard to do. You mention that there is something called the multiverse theory, which is just a theory, stating that the universe is naturally fine tuned, but this theory does not really work and there's still no explanation as to how this came about.
Did I understand you correctly?

Thank you for posting this because I do find it painful to see some people's deepest beliefs and values trivialised, mocked or misrepresentrd by a minority.

But perhaps partly under our control?

By knowing that religion is a load of bollocks.

There is no evidence of any God or Gods.

Post a link to a paper or article that proves that any God exists.

And there is no faith at all required to be an atheist.