AIBU to think using their voucher only on their share was rude?

[Dinnerdrama]

We were invited out to dinner with friends at the weekend.They planned to visit a particular restaurant and asked if we’d like to go along.
We had a nice enough meal, couple bottles of wine, liqueurs. All quite pleasant for a Friday night.
When the bill arrived one of our friends presented a voucher and asked for the bill to be halved and the voucher taken off theirs. The waiter seemed slightly bemused and repeated back the request. Our friend repeated and clarified they wanted the bill split and the voucher taken off their half.
I almost died of second hand mortification. Is this not CF of the highest order?! I wouldn’t dream of doing this when I invited people out. If I was that skint, I’d use the voucher as a couple and
not invite others along.
For the record, I have been out for a meal previously with them where I have had a voucher and I had the voucher taken off the whole bill and split the remainder.
Cannot believe the brass neck, it has put me off going out with them again. Massively embarrassed on their behalf, not sure why, they didn’t seem to be!!

You aren't what you think you are.

Yes and they used it for a reduction of their meals

Not to me!

What is the difference?

Surely this should be

If you go clothes shopping with a friend and you each decide to buy a dress, would you expect her to split the gift token she got for her birthday with you, if previously you went shopping after your birthday and shared your gift token with her?

But if the last time we went clothes shopping, I'd shared my gift voucher with you, then it would be breathtakingly rude not to return the favour, yes?

Fuck me sideways!

WHAT SORT OF VOUCHER WAS IT?

If you’ve previously let someone else use their voucher to pay for your food. You don’t invite that same person out and refuse to use your voucher for their food.

-if it’s a % off voucher YANBU

-if it’s their own gift voucher, then that is the equivalent of money, and YABU in that situation

Voucher is the same as cash

im not understanding the problem

They were gob smacked as they know you and were listening to you telling your experience. They were feeding bank the energy and shock you were giving about the situation. We're reading the facts and think what's the big deal, why are you offended. They're you're friends, if my friends had a pizza hut voucher and we're eating in pizza hut good for them using it on their food. What would you of liked them to do? Tell you before you booked? Saved their voucher for another time? Used it off the whole bill? I genuinely don't understand your outrage. You don't sound like a very good friend to me. Plus you're telling people about it in real life and made a post on here about it. That seems excessive to me.
Maybe they're a bit skint and yet want to have a nice evening out.

Since you say that you have shared a voucher in the past I vote for your friends being unreasonable to not share.

However I also think it odd that friends did not tell you in advance what they were going to do. You seem to have said that your friends chose the restaurant because they had the voucher. I would have liked to have known in advance why they were so happy to splash out on wine and liqueur. A unshared voucher is for a couples meal.

yeah its cringe especially as you put your voucher to the whole bill in similar scenario.

I'd avoid going out with them for a meal again purely on the basis of avoiding 2nd hand embarassement 🤡

This is batshit. I’ve never known a social rule where if you have a gift voucher for a restaurant you shouldn’t dine with others as it would be rude.

She answered this?

If you'd been brought up with manners you'd realise you were being unbelievable cheap ;)

I did agree with you when I read your OP and it was referred to as a voucher. But from your further posts it seems to be a gift card which changes things in my opinion. If a gift card has been purchased for someone as a birthday present for example, I can see why that person would want to use it to pay for their meal and not subsidise the whole table.
I don’t think I would do this personally, but can see why others would. But I wouldn’t be offended.

Agreed

if you are referring to values - In my book it would be to speak to the couple directly - tell them how you feel and keep the friendship but instead you are taking a passively aggressive option giving them no chance to explain or know what you are peaved about - not a good value to act out in my book

so your values in this case are - don't
communicate openly but make moral judgements then behave aggressively passive so the people who you have a beef with have no idea why when you don’t want to eat out with them anymore

Your friends clearly need to ditch you and have better friends.
most of us are mortified for you!
imagine being gifted a voucher and a friend expecting to take a piece of it! How embarassing!

@Dinnerdrama if I was given a gift card to use then absolutely I would be using it on my meal, any left over can be taken off the rest of the bill before it’s split.

It’s my gift, not yours!

In fact, if they invited you to that specific place it was probably because they had a gift card they could use to get a freebie night out!

I don't take food from my friends' plates in restaurant, we all have our own. It's exactly the same.

I also don't agree with you that the voucher is not like cash. Except that it can only be spent in one place it's exactly the same as having cash in your pocket, or eating in the only restaurant in town that accepts a payment by Amex card.

I'm with you, OP. I think it's pretty rude of them

I already said.

Cash is cash, money you have to spend as you like. A voucher that says "£100 off the bill at Restaurant X" is exactly that, an ability to reduce the bill. I would not dream of inviting people to share a meal for which I had the ability to reduce the bill and not share that reduction. If I didn't want to share I wouldn't invite other people

Ah, I must be in a different headspace today as I cannot for the life of me understand what type of voucher this was - and it matters.

I think you are the stingy one. It doesn't matter that you have paid for them in the past. When I pay for someone's meal it's because I want to treat them in that moment, not because I want to keep a mental tally for them to repay in the future.