AIBU to think using their voucher only on their share was rude?

[Dinnerdrama]

We were invited out to dinner with friends at the weekend.They planned to visit a particular restaurant and asked if we’d like to go along.
We had a nice enough meal, couple bottles of wine, liqueurs. All quite pleasant for a Friday night.
When the bill arrived one of our friends presented a voucher and asked for the bill to be halved and the voucher taken off theirs. The waiter seemed slightly bemused and repeated back the request. Our friend repeated and clarified they wanted the bill split and the voucher taken off their half.
I almost died of second hand mortification. Is this not CF of the highest order?! I wouldn’t dream of doing this when I invited people out. If I was that skint, I’d use the voucher as a couple and
not invite others along.
For the record, I have been out for a meal previously with them where I have had a voucher and I had the voucher taken off the whole bill and split the remainder.
Cannot believe the brass neck, it has put me off going out with them again. Massively embarrassed on their behalf, not sure why, they didn’t seem to be!!

If they had paid with their debit card would also have been mortified?

It's just a different way of seeing it. If I was given a voucher for £50 at a restaurant and I then invited other people to come and eat at that restaurant I would put the voucher to the total before splitting it and it wouldn't occur to me not to because I would see the voucher as benefit to be shared across the whole meal. Wouldn't feel to me in the least that I was paying for anyone else.

If I wanted to get more of the benefit for myself I wouldn't invite other people out to the same meal.

But I understand people see it differently so wouldn't be too put out by someone doing differently although I would be surprised.

Yeah I don’t really see the issue. I mean I’d think it generous if they offered to split it but I wouldn’t think it ungenerous if they used it for themselves, I wouldn’t expect them to pay for me whether that be cash, card, or a voucher.

It is now pretty obvious it was a gift card and op expected this "gift" to be shared 😂

You’ve not answered why you think they should have paid £50 of your meal for you? I’m blown away that you think they are CF for not giving you a free meal, could you be any more entitled?

Absolutely don't understand why this is bad. They had a voucher for £100 and used it to pay for their meal, just like cash.

If they had been gifted £100 cash would you expect them to share that too? Why is a voucher different to cash?

Yes surely its just like they put down cash?

No you're being weird. Why should they pay for any of your meal? A gift card is no different to paying with cash or card. If it was a % off voucher then they're being weird.

Just imagine the voucher as their own cash though? I can’t see why on earth you think this is weird and “mortified for them.” I wouldn’t even bat an eyelid!

Nobody is paying for someone else. They chose not to share some of the bill being reduced. Which is their perogative but it's still a bit weird to ask people to go out together and then not share the reduced bill.

Anyway people are hugely entrenched in opinions on this. Don't think anyone's mind is going to be changed because they see it so differently.

I would find it unthinkable to behave how OP's friends did myself but not actually find it more than a bit odd if it happened to me.

I’ve been out with friends before and they’ve used a voucher towards their bit. I don’t see anything wrong with that.

Why are so many people pretending OP didn’t say this?

For the record, I have been out for a meal previously with them where I have had a voucher and I had the voucher taken off the whole bill and split the remainder.

Of course it’s not okay to accept someone using their voucher to pay for your meal and then not return the favour when you have a voucher. Gobsmacked how many think this is not exceptionally rude.

you think they should be mortified for using a gift card to pay? When its the equivalent of cash in this scenario.

maybe it helped them afford a treat.

I mean if they invited you on the basis of sharing the voucher or it was a discount of say 20% then fair enough.

your attitude is batty, like why are you judging your friends like this & why are you asking others to judge them, will it make you feel better?

It’s not “sharing the bill being reduced” they split the bill fairly and paid some of their part using a gift voucher instead of cash. I can’t understand how anyone can think that is unreasonable!

Why are you being vague?

The nature of this 'voucher' matters.

Also, were you invited, or asked if you would like to go to this restaurant as they were going?

The answers to these 2 questions is relevant to your AIBU.

It’s not a discount voucher, it’s a gift voucher! Money towards their meal has been gifted to them in a pre paid format. It’s not a ‘discount’. OPs reaction of being ‘mortified’ for them not giving her a free dinner is CFery

Did you order more expensive food than you would have - like going along with them

and are now sore they had a voucher and you got a bit conned?

because I can’t think why you’d be annoyed

Exactly. And weird that the OP won't clarify.

Edited to say, I missed her clarification! Apologies.

Yes this.
I just see it differently. And I suppose hold people to the standard of behaviour I would display.

I do not think it is entitled. I didn’t know they had a voucher. But I was very surprised when the bill came. Exact same scenario when we all went out for a meal, but when I had £100 voucher I deducted it from the whole bill and split the rest.
I clearly prefer generous and magnanimous people to hang around with. No problem to keep the voucher for yourself, just don’t invite others to join.

I shall continue to be discerning about the company I keep and display generosity of spirit among likeminded friends 😍

We get vouchers sent to us that are for a minimum of diners. It would be interesting to know what the voucher said.

I.e. get £20 off a table of four. The restaurant wants 4 mains paid for but will give a discount. They don't care if the bill is split and the discount applied in a certain way as long as the table covers 4.

May have explained the bemused waiter.

Even though she had previously “subsidised” (is this really how you think of treating friends?) them?

I have bought restaurant vouchers for relatives for birthdays and Christmas. The gift is to them I wouldn’t expect them to share it with friends. If it was in cash would you have expected them to share it?

Try reading all her posts!

Wow. How small minded of you.

Try reading my edit!