DH wont leave

[Rainymay12]

Dh refusing to leave. I have asked him to leave, I have had enough. I work to pay all bills and get his card “here and there” to “pop to the shop” i do all house work, childcare school runs whilst he spend 7 days a week working for his Dad’s buisness of which he gwts a tiny wage and we see none of it. Recently his mother has been more than horrific towards me and he has been so so complacent about it, he is complacent about everything, the house needs replastering and lots of work outside, we need a new car we need a new lawnmower my tumble dryer is on the blink. Im spending yet another weekend solo parenting with no car. I asked him to leave at linch time. He laughed and said hes not leaving to be without the kids. Do I pack up with kids and go? This is nothing new ive had countless convos about things needing to change, with countless promises..

Useless she makes threads every few weeks about him, his family and him being at their beck and call & paid a pittance

She cannot do that now that the new Renters Rights Bill came into affect on 1st May 2026.

It's very difficult to evict tenants now, and her DH could still refuse to leave, it could take her Dad 2 years to get him out through the courts and cost her Dad thousands of pounds to do so.

If the house is rented surely it's your landlords job to fix the property, even if that is your own father.

Don't be asking your DH to leave, tell him sounds like along with doing no parenting duties he hardly sees his DC anyway, maybe remind him of this, especially if you're arguing in front of them.

He obviously likes where he works so he can kip on the floor at his parents business in return for working all hours and receiving only a "tiny wage".

If he still refuses to go will you father step in and tell him to go?

Well it depends if you rent or have a mortgage and whether you are married or not, also if he gets a tiny wage and works for his dad i bet he wont give you any maintanence, you cant ask him to leave a home if hes on the tenancy or if he owns the home and is paying the mortgage unless hes being violent, if you have a joint mortgage the house would be sold, can you afford to get another mortgage on your own?

So true. Ex tried various tactics to ‘bring me in to line’, such as threatening to go for custody, threatening to move abroad and so on. I never rose to any of it - grey rock method.

That's hilarious 😂

Get your Dad to come and change the locks and cancel his card.

Find your self respect.

@Rainymay12 Im spending yet another weekend solo parenting with no car. I asked him to leave at linch time.

But you just said he's a low earner. Given that cars are freakishly expensive now, how do you expect him to pay for a car?

It's becoming more and more common for men to work in low paid jobs. Your choice is to either accept that most men you meet won't have much money, or to remain single.

Complaining about your husband not having money is not going to alter those two options.

That's probably the worst advice you could possibly give her.

OP, whatever decision you choose, cut off immediate funds to your husband. Do not cook for him, nada. Gather resources, do your research, seek legal advice and take steps. You’re in a good position that your dad is the one that owns the house so there’s got to be some loophole. Someone suggested you take the children move in with your parents and your dad increases the rent within market value, my first thoughts is that seems like the least time-consuming approach to getting him out and this also sounds like a loophole which could work to your advantage, since you’re not kicking him out (technically!)

You need proper legal advice about the tenancy. It's the marital home - OP cannot change the locks or exclude him. If OP moves out, her dad will not be able to remove him without a lengthy eviction.

What’s the point in increasing the rent, he’s not going to pay it.

then he gets to stay in the family home
whilst OP and her kids squeeze into someone’s spare room?

do these ideas even sound good when people think of them?!

Because then you can evict on rent arrears rather than having to actually sell.

Up to ops dad if he then chases for a ccj for non payment.

This.

I'm horrified whenever someone suggests leaving the children with a negligent parent to show the other parent how hard it is. It's a horrible thing to do to the kids!

A. Mom leaving will feel like abandonment.
B. They're being left in the care of, at best, an incompetent parent, one who may not want them.
C. They could be injured, neglected, or verbally/physically abused. Or worse.
D. It will destroy any sense of security and safety they have. The mental trauma can't be emphasized enough.

Why would someone make their children miserable? Isn't their happiness and safety more important than giving the negligent parent a taste of daily life?

Getting out might be necessary, but don't leave the children behind! If the situation is too hard for a parent to live in, then how could anyone leave their children in it?

(I'm not directing my comment to @Rainymay12. She said nothing about leaving the dc.)

She’s doesn’t. A lawyer can’t do anything about the tenancy. It’s not a complex situation

This is nothing new ive had countless convos about things needing to change, with countless promises.

This is one of those threads where the OP wants her DH to change his behaviour but isn't willing to change hers.

Empty threats, countless promises, ultimatums that are never seen through.

Nothing is going to change.

If he is on the tenancy agreement he has every right to stay.

Go and see a solicitor. Your DH is not taking you seriously. A landlord eviction will take a minimum of four months. Are you still washing, cooking and cleaning for him?

The landlord can't evict him.

do you have a written tenancy ? If so you can end the tenancy and it means it will end to the both of you . Your dad can then just do one in your name . This would mean no change for you and the kids but he will have to legally leave . Off course this might drag as he might make your dad take you both to court but this is your safest bet . Unless he is abusive then you can and should contacted police and get him removed for your safety .

Why can’t the landlord evict him?

What if he decides to sell the home?

Yes it can , both of them and then do a contract just in her name .

I wish people would stop advising the OP to do things that are clearly against the law. Her Dad could face serious legal repercussions, if he did this. Some Landlords have been jailed for illegal evictions, others fined tens of thousands of pounds.

He can still evict them just takes longer

the new renters rights bill came in on 1st May which means he can’t evict them expect in a few circumstances which don’t apply.

OP can give notice, but it may still take a while to get DH out if he refuses to leave.

easier to start the divorce and negotiate housing as part of that.

He can only evict if he wants to sell the home. OP is not suggesting that, she is just expecting her DH to move out.