AIBU to find my husband's constant undressing at home annoying?

[saamantha19881]

My husband has asked me to post on here to guage opinions.
The minute he gets in the door he takes his top off, often- his trousers too and will just be wearing pants. He says it is more comfortable.

I'm starting to find it really annoying, once in a while if it's really hot it makes sense. But it is literally all summer and winter. It means he can't ever answer the door, just pop into the garden or grab something from the car. And to be honest, I just don't like it.

Apparently it is completely normal (his dad did it too) and he thinks I would be surprised because everyone does this in their own homes??

So not especially relevant to the Op

I’n be astonished if his family were ok with this exhibitionist behaviour.

You being a naturist @Myli1 basically defines your mumsnet personality. It’s all you seem to post about!

My household is me (adhd) hubby (asd) and older teenage son (AuDHD w pda). We cover up if visitors here. I will wear decent level of clothing if son is around, if it’s just me and hubby we wear as much or as little as we want. Son with PDA struggles with demands, including wearing clothes some days. So we have a rule that he can wear what he like so long as it is a) not skin tight to make me uncomfortable, and b) he covers up of goes to his room if we have visitor. He usually wears boxer briefs so if he’s walking round he will put a towel round his waist.

my point was if OP’ husband thinks it’s normal because of the way he was brought up, then that’s normal for him.

Respect works both ways. I agree if it makes others uncomfortable that there needs to be some compromise. But OP seems to be completely oblivious to to discomfort her hubby feels wearing clothes, like the hubby said it was normal in his family home. All
I said was some ND people struggle with clothes as their body regulates different to NT folks. I didn’t say ALL ND people don’t wear clothes. I just meant it’s more common amongst the ND populations to have sensory issues, including temperature regulations surrounding clothing.

Some people like being naked (although if he was fully naked that would be different) but wearing pants round the house..really don’t see the problem. I get being annoyed if you have to be answering the door all the time, but I don’t get why else it annoys you. I wouldn’t care if my partner went around in pants, I love him and his body and if he’s most comfortable like that why would I have a problem with it?

I don’t see why he can’t just wear comfy shorts and a t shirt if he’s too hot ?
I don’t know where you live but my house is definitely not warm enough yet to be walking round in underwear.
And even if it was warm enough we would be wearing comfy cool casual day clothes

I can see why someone would change when they got home but I've never known anyone who sits around in underwear! Surely he could put shorts on?

I wouldn’t like that at all . Change into your comfies but sitting there in pants is weird .

Both my adult boys do this. They are autistic and have sensory issues with clothes. They are also both intolerant to heat and are always hot even in winter.

Personally I don't think sitting around in just underwear is at all a good look (for men or women!) and with the abundant amount of nice lounge wear available it's simply not necessary! 😏
It's a fact that many men don't 'wipe' when they have peed, they simply 'shake it' so there is bound to be residue on underwear which frankly is not something that should be placed directly onto soft furnishings...that's why it's called UNDERWEAR!! 🙄
To some this obviously might come across as 'snobby' but surely if those living in close proximity to you are not comfortable with it, if you have any respect for them at all DON'T do it, BUT more importantly, from a hygiene point of view, it's a definite NO! 😱

Yes I think it would be fair to say that. As an under-represented minority I do like to bang my drum about it a bit! 😀

Even if it really is shoe horning it in to a thread where it’s pretty irrelevant. Like this one!

Well it’s fairly relevant here because the whole thread is about sitting at home naked or semi-naked.

He would never even leave the bedroom if he wasn't wearing some form of top and bottoms, would never even walk around top less at home either
Same as my Dh and also my two adult sons in their own home.

You really don't like it and therefore he should play Nice and agree to not do it so often - or maybe at all. Your home is a shared space and you have your rights too.

Where other members of the family are uncomfortable!! Whereas you live with a fellow nudie!

Ugh!
my husband puts on pjs- sleeps in the buff though
he shouldn’t be sitting on sofas just in pants. He will sweat directly onto the upholstery

I say he should at least wear pjs or a light dressing gown / kimono style thing (male kimono could be comfortable and light?! Plus give him some Shogun sex apppeal ;)

If his dad did it then that's likely why he does it. If it had bothered him while he was growing up he would never have done it as an adult. Do you have children - if so, depending on their age, what do they think about it or do they just accept that it's what dad does? Behaviours are usually traced back to parents and their parents - like hereditary - because dad did it it's normal to him. Similarly, men will usually treat their wife how their dad treat their mum (rightly or wrongly) because of conscious or unconscious influence in the family home. In some homes there was a dominant parent and a submissive parent and depending on the dynamics will reflect in the children as they move into adulthood.

It's part of the old adage - if you spot something in someone's character you only have to look at the parents for answers.

Is DH a dominant male who fights for his rights to be alpha male or can he be swayed into seeing things from yours and your children's perspective? Imagine their friends coming round - what would happen?

How about a nice light authentic kimono in good quality material? Or a poncho or thobe or kurta? Something with few seams, from a hot country, for men.

Bloody hell, how embarrassing 🙈

Ex-H IMMEDIATELY changes into T shirt and shorts once home

I’d say @MaryBeardsShoes dad was skirting a fine line to sexual harassing his daughter by wandering around his home stark naked all the time

I could see a loose tshirt and shorts or loose jogger pants, but no thank you to the underwear/no top. To me, that's just strange and a bit of a cliche, tbh.

My DH is sat on the sofa now wearing just underpants and shorts. He does have socks though, so more than half dressed.

My ex-husband used to do this, and to be honest it made me very uncomfortable. For a start, it meant I’d always have to open the door and he’d have to scurry upstairs, if the kids suddenly wanted to pop over the park I’d have to go etc-plus, I just didn’t like it. I would never in a million years walk round in my underwear!