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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Friend’s awful dress and my reaction

974 replies

SummerFate · 02/05/2026 15:28

A friend is mine is quite heavily into fashion and spends a lot on clothes. Some of her choices are quite bold and not necessarily what I would pick, but she has a good figure and is quite distinctive looking, so can generally pull off something a bit more “out there”.

However, yesterday she showed me the dress she has spent a fortune on for an event - and it’s hideous. Not “not to my taste” - objectively hideous. And my face reacted before my brain could tell it to keep quiet.

She could tell immediately that I thought it was awful and she looked really upset. She said straight out, “You hate it, don’t you?”, and while I tried to say it just wasn’t my personal cup of tea, it was too late. It was obvious I hated it. I said we all have different tastes, what suits her wouldn’t suit me and that I’ve seen things look amazing on her that I could never wear, but the rest of the evening was really awkward.

I’ve messaged this morning saying I’m sorry if I upset her and that I didn’t mean to, and that she shouldn’t let what I think affect her choice. She hasn’t replied.

How do I fix this? Do I just hope it blows over? I know I should have tried to hide my thoughts, but when she said she’d spent twice what I pay a month for my mortgage, I was expecting something amazing - I just couldn’t hide my reaction when I saw this monstrosity.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
32
WhatDoRacoonsSay · 02/05/2026 15:50

You did nothing wrong.
Why on earth does she expect her friends to like her clothes?

WhatDoRacoonsSay · 02/05/2026 15:51

SummerFate · 02/05/2026 15:48

Well, it’s your fault if she finds the thread and never speaks to me again 😄 But here it is:

Is your friend a Pantomime Dame?

PivotPivotmakingmargaritas · 02/05/2026 15:51

Yeah ….my face would have failed with that dress….

Sourandsweet1 · 02/05/2026 15:52

At the moment all this woman has done is not reply to a message the op sent her a mere few hours ago!!

Fairyliz · 02/05/2026 15:52

Gettingbysomehow · 02/05/2026 15:39

We need to see this monstrosity urgently. Well I do anyway 😂

You are not the only one.

EasternStandard · 02/05/2026 15:52

SummerFate · 02/05/2026 15:48

Well, it’s your fault if she finds the thread and never speaks to me again 😄 But here it is:

Wow that’s something. Yeh not many could hide behind an it’s great.

Merryoldgoat · 02/05/2026 15:53

Sweet Jesus that is vile and I like some out-there shit.

AccordingToWhom · 02/05/2026 15:53

There is such a thing as objectively hideous after all.

Usernamefuture · 02/05/2026 15:53

SummerFate · 02/05/2026 15:48

Well, it’s your fault if she finds the thread and never speaks to me again 😄 But here it is:

Oh now that really is something isn't it 😳

newornotnew · 02/05/2026 15:54

SummerFate · 02/05/2026 15:48

Well, it’s your fault if she finds the thread and never speaks to me again 😄 But here it is:

I would never in a million years choose the dress, but I think you've been very rude and judgemental towards someone you say you consider a friend.

It isn't even that out there, it's just ruffle-heavy.

Given you know she wears more unusual clothes than you, I can't understand why this dress made you shocked.

Sourandsweet1 · 02/05/2026 15:54

This reply has been deleted

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Riverpaddling · 02/05/2026 15:54

Is it made from nappy sacks?

InfrequentPropolis · 02/05/2026 15:54

Yes. That is objectively hideous. She should be thanking you for staging an intervention. Apart from anything else it looks aggressively flammable.

EmeraldRoulette · 02/05/2026 15:55

@SummerFate if it's any consolation I once went out with a friend wearing a coat that I thought was a dressing gown... a comedy dressing gown. It made her look like Big Bird from Sesame Street - oh my God, I'm cracking up as I type this - and I really thought I was doing a good job hiding my feelings

She was very wealthy and big on couture and normally has the most amazing clothes

Clearly, I didn't hide my shock properly because she made a joke about it as we were walking to the bar! I think that would be more of a normal response.

Anyway, I tried to hide my feelings and it totally didn't work

So yours slipped out, what can you do? I think a lot of people would react like that to that style of dress.

I started a thread too! Couldn't believe that was in style.

it was a long time ago, though. Oh dear, I've been on here for too long and I post too much.

I'm sure she'll get past it.

AccordingToWhom · 02/05/2026 15:55

Riverpaddling · 02/05/2026 15:54

Is it made from nappy sacks?

Or Quality Street wrappers?

shesarunnershesatrackstar · 02/05/2026 15:56

I’ve seen worse.

TroysMammy · 02/05/2026 15:56

Carrier bag chic.

SnappyQuoter · 02/05/2026 15:56

That’s… that’s quite something. Oh no. It’s like the dress Drew Barrymore’s character wore to her teenage prom in Never Been Kissed. Or something they’d dress an “ugly sister” in. It’s awful.

user1492757084 · 02/05/2026 15:57

Only a very tall, slender, tanned and elegant figure could look stunning in that dress. It is overwhelmingly fussy.

cordeliavorkosigan · 02/05/2026 15:57

It really does look like plastic! Did you feel the texture?
You've done nothing wrong, you didn't intend to let your reaction slip across, and that dress is, um... just wow.

JoyLoveJoyInOrbitNsoul · 02/05/2026 15:57

Over a toilet roll type dolly dress.

Createausername1970 · 02/05/2026 15:57

SummerFate · 02/05/2026 15:48

Well, it’s your fault if she finds the thread and never speaks to me again 😄 But here it is:

That's not quite as bad as I was envisioning, but it's definitely not something I would want to wear. It's got Ugly Sisters overtones.

Oh no it doesn't.
Oh yes it does.

Rhaidimiddim · 02/05/2026 15:57

I don't see that there is anything to fix. She asked your opinion, you gave it. A little mor sincerely and negatively that she expected. But you did nothing wrong.

You've compounded your blameless behavior by delivering the usual - and fully acceptable - "different tastes" defence and by reaching out to smooth things over.

She has responded with nothing. She's either sulking, dissing you to all your mutual friends, or rethinking the dress. Whatever, the ball is in her court now to teassure you thatbthings are OK, if that is the case.

If things aren't OK - well, you've lost a friend who didn't have the sense to separate taste in dresses from what really matters in a friendship.

KnowledgeableAvocado · 02/05/2026 16:00

Bloody hell. Nearly spat me tea out