Is this fair?

[notgivinga]

One of my nieces was getting married later in the summer, but last week it was all called off.
she had a hen party booked abroad and everyone going has paid nearly £300 as a deposit which has now obviously been lost.
she has now written in the group that she is so sorry but they all need to pay a cancellation fee of just under £100.
Do you think this fair. Just as an aside the wedding is off as she was texting other men.
BTW it’s not me going but my daughter

This makes no sense. You lost a deposit when cancelling, that’s the point of a deposit. You don’t pay a cancellation fee on top of a deposit. CF.

They should get together and bring a class action against her for emotional distress, outfits and the loss of Prosecco!

Well the OP said it was called off because the bride was texting other men. So I’d say it’s definitely her fault and she should suck up any costs.

Not enough info. Who booked it? If it's the niece then no don't pay.

I missed that she cheated? What an awful person. And so entitled. I bet she added her own cost of the holiday in to all then hens too.

Poor bride.

the best thing to do is still go as a holiday, minus the bride obviously.

Not sure why the girls cant go anyway.

But no, not fair

This!

Does no one watch Martin Lewis? This is why you get travel insurance As Soon As You Book, to make sure you’re covered in case your holiday is cancelled in the lead up. I work in the travel industry, the deposit is paid upfront to secure a booking but likely the remaining cost is payable now because the group are into the non-cancellation period before the holiday, so at the very least a fee will apply. This is completely legit and standard for package holidays, the company will have paid the flight, hotel etc. And it’s not a case of ‘if the company can resell the holiday they should refund’ that’s just not how it works. Martin Lewis did a video exactly on this issue only a couple of weeks ago.

It sounds like the OP is asking who should have to stump up the cancellation fee morally if it’s the brides fault it’s not now going ahead. And that’s a different question.

Surely she should be paying that for being an unfaithful cow? Karma?

Not fair at all.. I wouldn't be paying this no way.
She has a complete disregard for everyone by the sounds of things.

Short answer: No, it isn’t fair — not even close. And you’re right to question it.
Break this down clearly and calmly, because situations like this can get emotional and messy very quickly.
What’s reasonable — and what isn’t
1. The £300 deposits
Everyone who booked the hen party chose to go, so losing the deposit is unfortunately one of those things. It’s disappointing, but it’s part of the risk when booking group travel.
2. The extra £100 “cancellation fee”
This is where it becomes unreasonable.
A cancellation fee should be:
Paid by the person who cancels, not the guests
Part of the organiser’s responsibility, because she was the one who arranged the trip
Not pushed onto others, especially when the cancellation is due to her own behaviour
Your daughter and the others didn’t cause the trip to be cancelled. They didn’t break up the wedding. They didn’t text other men. They didn’t make the decision to call everything off.
So why should they pay for it?
They shouldn’t.
3. The emotional layer
Your niece is probably embarrassed, overwhelmed, and trying to deal with the fallout of her own actions. Sometimes people in that state panic and try to shift costs or responsibility without thinking it through.
But that doesn’t make it fair.
What your daughter can say (calm, polite, firm)
If she wants to respond without causing drama, something like:
“I’m really sorry things have been so difficult for you, but I’m not able to pay an additional cancellation fee. The deposit was already a big loss, and the cancellation wasn’t caused by any of us. I hope you understand.”
This keeps it:

• Kind
• Clear
• Non‑argumentative
• Boundaried

My honest take Your daughter has no obligation to pay another penny. If the niece insists, that’s her being unreasonable — not your daughter being difficult. Firm message she can send Hi, I’m really sorry things have been difficult, but I won’t be paying the additional cancellation fee. I’ve already lost the £300 deposit, and the cancellation wasn’t caused by any of us who booked. I hope you understand, but I won’t be contributing anything further.

It's not their fault the wedding is cancelled. I assume the 300 plus 100 is still less than the total cost if they went?

I can’t believe she’s got the nerve to ask for that money. Your niece needs to learn that her actions have got consequences and, in this instance, it means she should be paying the cancellation fee in full. I was dumped once many years ago and my ex immediately said he’d pay the cancellation fee of our holiday (50% of the total)

I’ve never forgotten that. No quibbles or anything.

Absolutely fucking not.

The wedding was called off due to her being unfaithful. None of what’s happened is the fault of any of the guests that were going on the hen do, who have already shelled out enough money that they’ll be losing.

She’s a CF and I would in no way shape or form, be guilt tripped into paying something I wasn’t liable for, just because some family members might get ‘upset’. I’d be telling them to direct their upset at the person who caused it. Not the innocent guests who’ve already lost money because of her actions.

Also, how much is the bloody cancellation fee if everyone is being asked to chip in an extra £100 each?!

(And like other PP’s, I’m struggling to see why there would be a cancellation fee, when the loss of deposits should cover cancellations)

If they have all lost their deposits how is there also a cancellation fee? Is the fee legally chargeable and recoverable in the uk if it is a foreign holiday?

From what I've read on the Love Holidays website, the flight costs are charged in full, then there is a £75 cancellation charge. So presumably, the flights were £325pp?

All the girls booked on the trip should go anyway, as sometimes the cancellation fee can exceed the initial deposit. I imagine your niece is not that popular at them at the moment.

You all go and have a break up holiday.

It’s just £100

nevermind. She’s saved all the money she would have spent on the stupid hen do

The bride one hundred percent should be paying the entire cancellation fee. It’s one of those situations where you need to throw money at a very awkward situation to make it go away.

You can’t possibly say to people ‘So…girls…I have been texting other blokes so the wedding is off. I know you have already paid a significant amount of money towards the hen do, which is now not happening, but I need you to pay even more money to NOT go.’

She’s bonkers or very thick. I would not pay in a million years. She needs to face the consequences of her actions. If that were me I would work my ass off and pay all the hens back what they had already forked out.

Just don’t cancel it and don’t go???

I would be asking her for the £300 the cheek of her . Wow

I am surprised you say she will probably pay it so as not to upset the family.

I would really encourage my dd to tell this cousin to fuck off. The audacity in asking for to pay the cancellation fee on top of losing these women 300 pounds each, is astounding to me. There is no amount of peace I would care about keeping in the face of such cheeky fuckery.

Oh wow how cheeky is the ex bride to be she should be reimbursing the hens in full she was the one who fucked up the holiday.