Do you let your children scream?

[pleaseshutup]

Do you let your children scream?
Im talking about when they are playing, outside or in public spaces?
high pitched screaming or screeching?
If so why?
If not, why not?
Yabu: they are just children playing, leave them be.
Yanbu: they should be told to stop because it’s horrible for other people to listen to.

Both yes and no,

No I never let my children scream. If my child did scream it meant danger or something really bad happened.
I cannot tolerate it tbh.

Whats your definition of the screaming and shouting?Are you offended and complaining because you can hear them from your home, or because you think you get to decide who does what in public?
N. B. My dc quickly get told to wind it in when the screaming starts..

No.

No, screaming is awful. I let her shout if we're in the woods or on the beach (away from people) but I ask her to do indoor voices inside. She's only just 3 but Christ she's got a foghorn 😅

They need to learn to regulate. So there will be screeching and screaming, but they should be encouraged to calm down. It’s part of self control and self awareness.

I have two young DCs. My eldest age 5 is a screamer but my younger child isn’t. She does scream quite a lot whilst playing and just in general. She’s been referred for ASD and ADHD diagnosis and she doesn’t really have volume control, she is loud and if she’s playing she will scream sometimes. I can’t keep her inside the whole time so yes she will be loud in our garden and in public parks for example. The usual methods of disciplining don’t work on her and won’t stop the screaming anyway. To be honest I’m just happy that she’s happy and playing.

In a setting where it wouldn't bother others, yes.
In a setting where it would bother others, no.

Edited to add: I don't think perfection is a reasonable expectation of children, it's about what you'd be aiming for them to understand as the norm.

“Whats your definition of the screaming and shouting?”
My definition of screaming would be the same as most people’s, you know what a scream is?
high pitched, loud,
I didnt mention shouting although I would prefer if people were more quiet in general.
Screaming is different to shouting, it sets of my fight or flight response as a warning signal and also hurts my ears.

I’ve never heard my children scream!

Kids can scream happily, as you hear from the school playground or on the beach.

It sounds like it may affect you more than others - both in terms of the noise and your emotional response.

Some people are closer to fight or flight than others. Plus we change as we age.

No.

Are we talking about a short-lived scream of delight followed by a giggle, or prolonged screaming. I love the sound of the first, cannot stand the latter.

Not a fan of anyone screaming it just goes through me. Have always done my best to shut that shit down asap on the rare occasions my kids have started that.

You can only control you. It’s hard when others do things outside your control, but you just have to learn to adapt. I’m sure there are things I do that piss other people off!

If my children are being noisy anywhere that they might bother other people I tell them.

Nope. Any screaming is nipped in the bud. If they don't stop, we leave/go inside. They haven't screamed for a while though (older kids)

No, i managed to raise 3 children that didn't scream, all in their 30s now and i have never heard a single scream from them.

My children never screamed. Not because they were told not to, they just didn’t. But this did cause a conversation when they were older about screaming if they were ever in danger. Both of them are girls and neither of them knew how to do it!

No I absolutely hate it, it drives me insane. If mine make a noise in the garden I call them in. If I can't stand it the neighbours certainly shouldn't have to listen to it.

Mine was never a screecher or screamer thankfully.

Mine have never screamed in that high pitched way. I don’t know why though. I can’t claim to have trained them or taught them not to. They just never did it. I suspect it’s very difficult to ‘not allow’ for those naturally inclined to scream/shriek.

Hell, no. Was never allowed to scream myself as a child either. That ear piercing screeching goes right through me. Youngest is nearly seventeen so I'm way past all that shit anyway, thank fuck!

We were taught not to scream because it could cause people to think something was wrong. My mum always said you leave the screaming to a time when you really might need it to alert people that you are in trouble.

I absolutely hate the screaming that kids do nowadays. Parents and their “I can’t tell my child not to scream, it doesn’t work”.

Same here. I can remember DS having tantrums but not screaming.