I’m an affair baby

[wildgreyseas]

I don’t know how to process this information.

My parents had always, always maintained that their marriages had ended long before my mum got pregnant.

Anthony this is technically true, it’s come to light that they were both still married when they started seeing each other. Both in very unhappy marriages that were all but over, but still legally married and not separated. My mum was in an abusive marriage, so I kind of view that a little less harshly, but I feel sick to my stomach to think of it. It’s awful. The hurt they caused, and I’m a physical representation of it. I can’t even look at them.

And just how would that have made your half sisters lives any different? Their Mum is what made the difference to them growing up & her still the way she is decades later, not your & their Dad. Who was an involved father & contributed financially, generously.

Very

I don't think you're awful, but I do think you're kind of making this all about you. You will never know exactly what happened back then, but the outcome was happier lives for your parents. Your dad supported your half sisters well and you say yourself he was very involved in their lives.

You are the result of the love between your parents and you should be happy with that. Stop creating this drama and recognise that sometimes shit happens in relationships.

OP it sounds like you’re transferring your own hurt from the betrayal of being cheated on & your hurt & anger is being projected onto your parents.

therapy to heal your own wounds would be more beneficial for you. Keeping their relationship separate from your own life experiences.

I think your looking at this in terms of everything is black and white
your mum was abused and my guess is your dad’s marriage was over before your mum came along