Acquitence went to kiss toddler

[sarahmaguire]

I went to an event and it was just a few people. I have a 2 year old and we are going through the tantrum stage and crying when he can't do something.

I took something off him and that caused a small meltdown. It was just before nap time so I was getting my pram packed to go home and was looking at him but knew that we just had to go. I would take a minute or two and was right next to him. She comes and takes him and put him on her lap, doesn't ask, and then starts to mock kiss him saying "everything is ok".

I instantly get him and put him in the pram, of which is a struggle because tired toddler = only one solution.

I put the pram down flat and get him as settled as properly whilst saying Im going, and she continues to get right in his face and mock kiss. I really don't know if she will kiss him but really I wouldn't get that close to someone's kid who isn't a relative/I'm not good friends with. It was close enough for me to put my hand there to make sure.

Aibu? She has a kid the same age. I don't really want adults putting my child on their lap either, unless family or paid care. J

Just to be clear I was comforting him as much a si could but you know your child and what's best in the situation. I was also flustered and the event was winding downn so not disturbing anyone.

Ah … it’s someone who is just here for an argument.

None of this happened.

She saw you were struggling and stepped in to help. Quite normal, even though you may not like it.
You're defensive and overreacting.
So YABU.

She didn't kiss him though? You've said she mock kissed him.

Imagine if it was a man

Irrelevant, because it wasn’t.

You ok with your child being kissed?

Also irrelevant, since she did not kiss your child.

This is a bit disproportionate.

She didn't ask. She could have said do you want a hand. I was standing just there watching him. No need for her to take him out of eyesight.

She sounds helpful and kind, you sound overwrought. Could you try to think of it as lovely that there are people around who want to help, and care enough to try to stop your child being distressed?

No it's not

YABU for the way you are behaving and reacting on here for starters.

You are massively over reacting to what happened. She probably shouldn't have stepped in it was an overstep,but your reaction is massively disproportionate. Do you always react with such intensity over something that ultimately is not anything to be this angry about? You need to get some help for your anger issues @sarahmaguire before you end up in some serious trouble.

It really is.

You like your kids being taken to sit on Laos out of your sight and kissed? Ok

She was trying to help. It really isn’t as bad as you’re making out.

If someone helped me out, by distracting my screaming kid while I sorted crappy pram out… I’d kiss her myself 🤣

she’s not just anyone , she’s not a perv , she’s a fellow mum with a kid same age , so she has the empathy you ve probably not used to

This did not happen, no one could be as stupid as you. The name calling was Infantile.

Since moving abroad i have never experienced anyone with this view that only parents should show young children affection! Its really culturally specific to certain groups within the UK and it's very normal for people - especially mothers - to be kind and affectionate to children of friends. I dont see your problem and it sounds like she was trying to help.

She took her to Laos with asking ??? No wonder your so annoyed

You see that this part of the board is called AIBU? That stand for Am I Being Unreasonable. You are asking a question, so you do need to be prepared for people to disagree with you, that's how it works.

How was he out of eyesight if you could see what was happening?

This post and posting style are very familiar. There was a thread about a month ago that was pretty much identical.

The interaction between them was harmless, sweet even. It’s your baby, your choice.

Yes it is. Do you usually call people names when they disagree with you?

Look everyone has said the same thing. So maybe you should stop and think (even if you don’t want to admit it to us) whether you overreacted.

She didn’t kiss your child btw. She made a noise/expression that is universally one of soothing and affection. I make that noise to my cat as well.

I think perhaps as a society we have swung too far. There is all this talk of a ‘village’ but we have also told young mothers that there is danger around every corner. For the most part there isn’t. For the most part people are simply trying to help. And mostly people are not in fact judging but thinking ‘Ah I remember that stage.’ It’s hard to believe that when you are in the throes of toddlerdom but this stuff happens. And in some ways having a village that soothes your child and corrects their behaviour is a good thing.

(The last I know is not popular but if my kids were acting up and I wasn’t immediately there or had picked up on, I wouldn’t mind someone correcting them gently. I would feel an immediate shame but I know that this is how a good healthy communal society should be).

She didnt 'grab' your toddler or 'kiss' him. She picked him up and tried to cheer him up and distract him by making kissing sounds. Are you always this difficult?

She didn't kiss him. You've said as much.