AIBU to resent friend on UC living better than us?

[Sunshineandrainbows123]

I know I am being unreasonable but just need to rant and I’m aware that perception is different to reality. I’ve worked hard all my life, since I was 14, paid my way through uni to get a decent qualification and job at the end of it all. I bought a house with my partner but as with so many of us I feel like I can’t rub 2 pennies together. Meanwhile a close friend claims universal benefits, has minimum 4 holidays a year, 2-3 abroad, gets regular beauty treatments, a new car and is able to regularly take her children to the cinema, days out and buy them new clothes, trainers and toys. I feel like I took the wrong path sometimes - she doesn’t have to pay rent for the home they live in, or school lunches for her kids, there are so many discounts and opportunities afforded to those on UC that working families don’t get. I don’t know if it’s better to distance myself. I know I need to probably give my head a wobble.

I think your friend has another income she hasn't declared.

Do you mean 2006?

she doesn’t have to pay rent for the home they live in

Oh really? Does her landlord not charge rent then? Does she own her house so no housing costs?

Just with you saying she doesn’t have to pay rent hun.

Is it though?

Are you usually this gullible

Even if this were true, it's only temporary. She won't be able to claim for her kids forever and she isn't on the property ladder.

You meanwhile will be building a pension, possibly saving and will hopefully fully own your own home one day.

Fast forward a few years & her life choices won't look so great.

Im thinking OP has work ethic and morals...

Yes it is though

Never ceases to amaze me how folks know so much about other people's finances, I don't tell anyone what goes into my accounts as it's none of their bloody business and one or two acquaintances may start a thread about me as I'm a single Mother.

If you rent HA house that can work. If you qualify for motability it looks like you have new cars, but they are leased through the scheme. All sorts of ways to get very cheap short holidays if that’s your priority. But benefits won’t pay a mortgage. Unless you are also working, there probably won’t be private pension or significant savings for emergencies. And presumably there’s some sort of health issue for the motability car. And you are completely at the mercy of this week’s government.

I am certain that there is a sweet spot between working full time and not working which maximises both your income and your non-working time. A lot of parents at our primary school found they were better off reducing hours and getting the top up (plus bonuses like FSM). Just as some higher earners are better off taking less money home (reducing hours or increasing pension payments). The system is inherently broken.

Sounds like credit cards / loans / Klarna. Thank your lucky stars that's not you, as one day that all that debt will come home to roost

Well, why did you say in your first post that she gets that on UC?

Exactly. This is where benefit bashers don’t think their arguments through. Zero sympathy for the lot of them.

Sorry, you’re right. She does have to pay rent to a landlord but it is covered by the housing element of her UC I believe

To shit stir

It is almost never entirely covered especially private rent. Local housing allowance where I live is less than 80 pc most market rents

Shhh don't be stating facts now it doesn't fit in with op narrative

She must be getting help or not declaring money as I can barely afford a holiday on UC.

So she does pay rent then. Doesn’t matter where the money is coming from, she’s still paying rent.

It never makes any sense when people say people on benefits are living there rent free or they’ve got a “free house”. Free house 😂. I know you haven’t said those exact words but my god some people are clueless.

She could do voluntary work for an excellent cause if that's the issue. That'd be a win all round wouldn't it? She does her bit for society, and rakes it in from UC.

The irony of your post proving my point exactly!😂👏

🤣 it is honestly helpful to understand these things and for real life experiences to be shared. The aggressive nature of some replies is interesting

I disagree. In any given universal system there will be people who work the system. I would say it is impossible to cover every possible individual or family circumstance because there are so many variables. Where you live, child care, age, disabilities, tax regimes etcetera. Nothing to do with a 'broken' system that can somehow be magically fixed to be perfect.

You have to be earning incredibly low to qualify for FSM. Something like £7,500 per year. In England anyway.