Do I ring him? Or sack him off?

[MissNameChage3000]

Supposed to be going on a date tonight. The man confirmed the restaurant last night (he booked the table) but didn’t specify the time. I messaged him saying let me know the plans tomorrow.

I have not heard from him all day. I messaged an hour ago asking whats the plan. He hasn’t been online for a few hours.

Shall I ring him? If we’re still going I need to start getting ready soon. (Shower makeup etc) but don’t want to come across as needy.

No

What job does he do? Maybe he was stuck at work, both DP and myself have jobs where we can’t just leave if something happens. We regularly have to change plans, so he may have been telling the truth.

Why are people so weird. He confirmed he'd booked it, didn't confirm the time then just stopped replying to you. He's got issues for sure. Hope you were able to have a good evening with a takeaway and netflix.

Lol

There are so many idiots on Mumsnet with such a low bar on men.You have done the right thing OP, sending solidarities.

I agree. Who needs someone who’s either disinterested and/or really bad at communicating

Deffo don't chase if he was keen he'd be in touch. Maybe he was just telling you what he thought you wanted to hear.

Dear OP. I'm sorry this man was so rude and uncaring in failing to contact you to say he was held up. It's unforgivable behaviour. Doesn't matter how busy he was. If his story is true (and who knows about that?), it would have been the work of a minute to text you with profuse apologies. But he didn't.
I'd take the view that you've dodged a bullet.

I hope you'll have better luck in future finding a really genuine & nice bloke.

Unless you’re in a coma, have been taken hostage or fallen down a hole, you can usually find 30 seconds to send a text message.

Like others have said, no dont ring, and dont go to the restaurant without a firm plan. Start a relationship as you mean to go on, be it a friendship, friends with bens, or something more.

It's too early for this lackadaisical energy.

I definitely think you've done the right thing. It's unlikely he was too busy to send you a message, but if he was, he ought to have apologised profusely ASAP and tried to make it up to you. I don't think he's worth pursuing.

Not many jobs where you couldn't even send a text.

Thank god I re-read the title of this post. It would have skewed all the responses. :)

Well done OP. Some here seem to have such low standards and non-existent barriers. Reading some PP replies...no wonder they get treated like crap. He could've nipped to the loo (if there's the vaguest possibility he was being truthful) and quickly text you, not that I'd believe for one moment he was being honest.
Onwards an upwards.

But you will ring/message each other to tell of the change not go dark leaving the other with no clue of where/what time?

Last couple of restaurants I went to you would have been classed as no show and possibly billed. The t&c of one I went to (expensive) charged you £250 a head if you cancelled less than 7 days notice or were a no show. He wasn't bothered if he was still at work at 8 and hadn't made any contact earlier in the day/week.

Absolutely not, and block

I’m amazed he even returned to give you a shit bullshit excuse tbh, I thought he’d just totally ghost. I think he got scared and chickened out.

No way did he book
and even if he did… no way was it a nice enough restaurant to have a cancellation fee. This would have been a Prezzo at best

Wtf is lovably incompetent??? 😂

So many women on here have a bar so low it’s subterranean.

Good for you op telling him to leave it.

Only takes seconds to text a reply. Bin.

Please don't let him reel you back in, if he gets in touch again. It might not be for a week or two, as he'll want the dust to settle.

If you do reply, you'll send out the signal that you put up with being second best.

He may like you a little, but liked the other Friday night plans that popped up more.

Good god what a load of drivel

If you read it back properly you will see that I didn't actually suggest anything.
Somebody called op pathetic and I was simply providing one possible reason (and my personal perception) as to why OP said what she said that explains why she wasn't necessarily being "pathetic", but that it might've been an attempt from her to make him feel guilty for leaving her to wait for him "all dressed up and nowhere to go".