Active discussions

Help end medical misogyny. Sign our petition.

Help end medical misogyny.
Sign our petition.

Sign the petition

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Make 9 year old learn to ride a bike?

259 replies

SherbettAnna · 26/03/2026 22:17

So DS is 9 now and hasn’t had a bike since he was about 4-5 (with training wheels) and he had a balance bike aged about 4.

We don’t live somewhere where he can just ‘ride his bike’ in the garden or outside the home. A bike wouldn’t fit in my little car so we would be limited to walking to a nice area he could ride to (I would walk him) once per week at the weekend. Wouldn’t be able to ride to school.

He isn’t bothered about a bike.
(He swims/ plays football x2 per week so it’s not like he’s not active).

I don’t know if I should spend money on a bike so he can learn to ride it eventually by practicing every weekend - only as I think he should be able to ride a bike.

YABU- Don’t get him a bike.

YANBU- he is 9 he should be able to ride a bike GO AND BUY ONE

All opinions welcome thank you.

OP posts:
FrenchandSaunders · 27/03/2026 07:41

My mum would have been 99 if she was still alive ... she used to cycle everywhere. I've got a lovely image in my head of her cycling to the local launderette with the front basket full of laundry 😀

I'd try and teach him OP, it is a useful life skill even if he doesn't end up cycling much. I'd worry his mates at secondary would take the mick if they found out ... that shouldn't matter obv, but it does!

likelysuspect · 27/03/2026 07:42

newornotnew · 27/03/2026 07:26

The fact some people can't do it doesn't mean it isn't a very useful life skill. Essential is a matter of judgement.

It's really helpful and fun to be able to ride a bike. It's a bit of a shame not to give a kid the chance to learn it.

Show quote history

Of course its useful, but that is not the same as essential, people use this word incorrectly

Essential is being fed, watered, housed, being able to pay your bills, having warmth, being clothed, being able to function to a large degree in society

I also notice, predictably, that any thread has to involve ageist comments, this one is no different.

ShodAndShadySenators · 27/03/2026 07:42

CassandraCan · 26/03/2026 23:17

Totally agree. Rest of Europe are all avid ride bikes: France, Italy, Denmark, Netherlands, Germany….the list is endless. Really bad attitude from the Brits yet again. No wonder we are a nation of unfit, overweight couch potatoes.

OP, yes get him cycling. It’s important for many reasons: meetings mates in late primary- up to late secondary-age; being independent before learning to drive; sightseeing as a family or when he’s a young adult with mates (loads of bikes to hire in London and European cities). Maybe it’s not a life skill like swimming, but it’s a skill that is easy to learn as a child and gives way to numerous opportunities

Show quote history

The thing is though, the culture around cycling in those places is very different to that of the UK. You don't see the attitude towards cyclists in the UK in Amsterdam, do you? I would willingly and happily ride bikes in the UK if the attitude was completely tolerant and there were decent cycle routes that are away from traffic-heavy roads. I used to ride my bike to work and was hit by vehicles plenty of times, and each time it was because the driver wasn't looking out for cycles, only other vehicles. It's not nice breathing in the fumes either.

I do enjoy cycling and think it's a marvellous thing: you get to where you want to be faster while getting some great exercise. It's a win-win, but not in the circumstances we have now. It's very much a good thing for kids to be able to do and I would encourage everyone to learn, but it's not in any way an essential skill. And that's a pity.

likelysuspect · 27/03/2026 07:46

ShodAndShadySenators · 27/03/2026 07:42

The thing is though, the culture around cycling in those places is very different to that of the UK. You don't see the attitude towards cyclists in the UK in Amsterdam, do you? I would willingly and happily ride bikes in the UK if the attitude was completely tolerant and there were decent cycle routes that are away from traffic-heavy roads. I used to ride my bike to work and was hit by vehicles plenty of times, and each time it was because the driver wasn't looking out for cycles, only other vehicles. It's not nice breathing in the fumes either.

I do enjoy cycling and think it's a marvellous thing: you get to where you want to be faster while getting some great exercise. It's a win-win, but not in the circumstances we have now. It's very much a good thing for kids to be able to do and I would encourage everyone to learn, but it's not in any way an essential skill. And that's a pity.

Show quote history

We will only cycle on traffic free routes, the rare time the route goes on a road for a while, supposedly designated a safe road or part of the route to connect to the next traffic free section its a bumpy, dirty, detritus strewn edge of the road, no protection from traffic which is bombing along, the edges of the road all have the drain covers/man hole covers in them to make it more uneven and is usually quite a heavy camber, very unstable.

Nomedshere · 27/03/2026 07:49

Im 66 and have never ridden a bike

TinselandTiarasRightNow · 27/03/2026 07:52

I paid 120 quid for someone to teach my kid to ride a bike at 8. It was such a good spend!

WhatNoRaisins · 27/03/2026 07:54

I think it's more dependent on where you live. My kids have little bikes and the park near us has an area for kids to ride bikes. I expect they'll stop when they grow out of this because like some PP have said we live somewhere that doesn't have any suitable cycle routes that you can do from our house, we'd have to transport the bikes by car. It's a shame because we are otherwise quite outdoorsy.

InterestedDad37 · 27/03/2026 07:54

I see it as a basic skill (though not essential) and have done it all my life. But it all depends on your circumstances. You don't just want it to gather cobwebs in a shed, or become a clothes-hanger in the hallway. 🚴

HoskinsChoice · 27/03/2026 07:57

BeeHiveStars · 26/03/2026 22:36

Yes, he really should know how to ride a bike and it's worth spending time on like you would swimming. Will he do cycling proficiency at school? He won't be allowed to take part if he can't ride a bike.

Actually, if we stop and think about it, why should kids know how to ride a bike? I haven't ridden a bike since I learned to ride a bike (about 50 years ago). It's not exactly a key life skill.

I'm with the OP. If he isn't anywhere where he's going to ride a bike, what's the point in learning?

likelysuspect · 27/03/2026 08:02

HoskinsChoice · 27/03/2026 07:57

Actually, if we stop and think about it, why should kids know how to ride a bike? I haven't ridden a bike since I learned to ride a bike (about 50 years ago). It's not exactly a key life skill.

I'm with the OP. If he isn't anywhere where he's going to ride a bike, what's the point in learning?

Show quote history

I dont think its a key life skill either but I do think there is a point in him learning because he may move somewhere where he can cycle to work (good luck to him), he may want to do it as a hobby, its good exercise etc

If he learns now, even if he never gets on a bike until he's in his 30s thats fine, he sitll has the skill

PurpleThistle7 · 27/03/2026 08:03

I never learned to ride a bike (too stubborn! Definitely everyone had a bike where I grew up) but it was important to me that my kids did so my husband took them out. He got a bike rack for the car as he needed to fit 3 on. To be honest, he’s the only one that enjoys it. Kids don’t cycle around here, we live in a very hilly city with lots of buses so kids walk or take the bus wherever they want to go. My kids couldn’t easily bike anywhere from our house so they drive somewhere to bike from outside the city.

they do bikability in p5 and the kids are usually about 50/50 with riding a bike. They have a stash at school as many kids don’t own one (living in flats with no garden so couldn’t easily store it anyway).

I have no idea what I’ve missed out on without riding a bike outside the trips with my family. I suppose it would be nice to do one of those bike tours in the Netherlands maybe? Otherwise I wouldn’t be riding a bike here in any scenario so it hasn’t affected my daily life at all.

Lovemuesli · 27/03/2026 08:04

BIossomtoes · 26/03/2026 22:45

Is it? I’ve never managed it and have managed to live a perfectly normal life for 72 years.

Show quote history

Me too. I've never had a bike and I'm 73.

Mangoandbroccoli · 27/03/2026 08:07

I think it’s our job as parents to teach our children skills that COULD become essential. At school we learn the foundation for so many different subjects so that we have the choice and ability for further study in those areas when older. Some will be useless and some will be essential. I personally can’t imagine not being able to ride a bike and feel it’s a skill that’s far easier to learn as a child. I think teaching it now is just part of ‘future proofing’.

FrauPaige · 27/03/2026 08:09

Does his primary not offer the Bikeability courses to help children to learn to ride?

MyUmberOrca · 27/03/2026 08:15

Riding a bike is a useful life skill for sure but how important it is for him will depend on where you live. I live somewhere where everyone cycles a lot. Adults & kids. My 15 year old cycles to school/park/town/cinema etc. If she didn't cycle it would be an issue because it seems to be the main way that everyone gets everywhere especially teenagers looking for independence. I appreciate that not everywhere is like that.

Heynow87 · 27/03/2026 08:15

I don’t think it should be schools problem to teach absolutely everything about life, parents need to take responsibility to teach their children life skills too. Cycling is not essential but life is much richer when you have more skills and experiences under your belt. We have a camper and use our bikes for transport when we stay on sites out of town. I’ve also used electric bikes to cycle around European cities. We also got our bikes out when there was a public transport strike in Rome and the taxis were all booked up.

SusanChurchouse · 27/03/2026 08:17

FFSToEverythingSince2020 · 26/03/2026 23:39

I can’t ride a bike. You’ve met one now. My abusive father tried to teach me how whilst verbally abusing me (he’d promise not to let go, he’d let go, I’d fall over, and then he’d scream at me for not “just peddling”). It made the whole experience so extremely unpleasant that I still can’t ride a bike. My ex couldn’t ride one (wasn’t essential to him), and my DH can’t ride one (AuDHD-related dyspraxia). So that’s three right there. My ex and DH have almost nothing in common except ADHD and lacking the ability to ride a bike.

Show quote history

Sorry to hear about how you were treated. My autistic brother (aged almost 50) can’t ride a bike either, never got the hang of it. I’m not sure he can swim either. I also suspect a dyspraxia of some sort.

HoskinsChoice · 27/03/2026 08:26

likelysuspect · 27/03/2026 08:02

I dont think its a key life skill either but I do think there is a point in him learning because he may move somewhere where he can cycle to work (good luck to him), he may want to do it as a hobby, its good exercise etc

If he learns now, even if he never gets on a bike until he's in his 30s thats fine, he sitll has the skill

Show quote history

But as you get older do you really need to 'learn', do you not just get on, wobble a bit then go. It's not like driving where it's complicated and can take hours to learn.

I'm not saying I'm right by the way, I'm just thinking it through and wondering why we put so much emphasis on riding a bike when some will never ride one and, if they do, it takes 10 minutes to learn.

deltapanda · 27/03/2026 08:26

I can’t get DS8 on a bike or two-wheeled scooter and have tried all sorts of ways, including paid instruction. Before, I probably would have thought it odd if a kid his age couldn’t ride a bike but I don’t judge now!

Our school bikeability course gives an extra session the day before for kids who can’t ride to catch up - there’s often a couple. So that will be crunch time for us.

likelysuspect · 27/03/2026 08:38

HoskinsChoice · 27/03/2026 08:26

But as you get older do you really need to 'learn', do you not just get on, wobble a bit then go. It's not like driving where it's complicated and can take hours to learn.

I'm not saying I'm right by the way, I'm just thinking it through and wondering why we put so much emphasis on riding a bike when some will never ride one and, if they do, it takes 10 minutes to learn.

Show quote history

Possibly, I dont know really. I learned as a child and bought my own first bike around 30 years ago so Ive had bikes of my own as an adult for most of my adult life. I ride for leisure but never once have I developed balance, Im very wobbly, Im not safe on the roads really. I have panic reactions to traffic.

I suffer with vertigo which doesnt help obviously!

Thechaseison71 · 27/03/2026 08:41

TheWildZebra · 26/03/2026 22:58

I’m actually staggered that people don’t think riding a bike is an essential life skill? How did you get around before you could drive? It’s so cheap and accessible. Need to go somewhere 2km away? Get on a bike. Buses aren’t running? Get on a bike. Traffic bad? Get on a bike. Can’t afford petrol today? Get on a bike.

perhaps it’s a generational thing - my mother also doesn’t cycle and she’s mid 70s. I’m late 30s and I don’t think I know a single person who doesn’t know how to ride a bike, and I’m hardly a cycle enthusiast.

All the kids seem to have their parents ferrying them around

TBh it was useful mine could ride bikes. Meant quick journeys felotlr them from air cadets and similar. DS used to ride his to meet mates and play football etc

Solasum · 27/03/2026 08:42

Several of my DS’s school trips have had cycling elements in them, and a child not able to join in would just sit and watch, not very fun for them

Iloveeverycat · 27/03/2026 08:44

Don't they do bike training anymore in primary school. They used to get you to go on the road too.

user1492757084 · 27/03/2026 08:44

Ask one of your friends who has a similar sized child, who can ride a bike, to help out. Meet a few times in a safe cycling space. It will only take two or three half hour sessions for your child to learn to ride.

His friend will be encouraging.
Then you can look out for a second hand bike and your son can practise and join in cycling activities.

5foot5 · 27/03/2026 08:45

likelysuspect · 27/03/2026 07:32

Not much common sense needed to know that being able to swim can save your life

Cycling, not comparable.

Show quote history

My comment about swimming to work was obviously meant to be flippant, well I thought it was obvious!

But you kind of illustrate my point about the Mumsnet obsession with swimming as a life skill. Yes, of course it is a great skill to have and, sure, I took DC to swimming lessons from an early age. In certain very rare circumstances it might save your life. But I would be interested to know how many of the people who die by drowning are actually non-swimmers who might have saved themselves if they could swim, or whether in an emergency situation in open water being able to swim several lengths in the public baths is not much help anyway. Indeed, it might often be the case that a non-swimmer. wouldn't have been in the situation in the first place.

Also if we are going to concentrate on life skills that could save a life, surely drumming in road safety must be right up there. And what about first aid?

But if we are to prioritise life skills I sort of feel that the ones that are very likely to be of important everyday use to you, e.g. driving and riding a bike, should be ranked above one that in very, very rare circumstances might possibly save your life. Or might not