To think that menopause talks at work might not be an entirely good thing?

[Wonderbug81]

We had a talk on menopause today at work. An outside speaker. About 10% of attendees were men (mainly younger) plus a mix of women of all ages.

The speaker went into a lot of detail about how debilitating perimenopause can be and the impact on work. She also talked through the support women can get both internally and through other orgs.

I know I should feel positive about all this but I couldn't help feeling that now people will just wonder whether any woman in their late 30s and above in our company (including me) is forgetting something or is 'off sick' because of their hormones.

I also feel a little uncomfortable that now, a lot more of my colleagues might now assume that if I am perimenopausal, I may have vaginal dryness and low libido among whatever else is wrong with me. Whether you have the symptoms or not it feels overly exposing and I have a couple of team members who would potentially exploit it as a vulnerability.

Please prove me wrong and tell me this is a positive move forward??

Has anyone said that the menopause talks at their company were compulsory/mandated?

OP said that around 10% who were in attendance were men. Unless she works in an extremely female dominated workplace then I assume the talk was just there for those who wanted to attend?

So are these menopause talks in the workplace mandatory usually ?

Ours aren't mandatory, there are specific training courses you can go on for things like 'how to line manage someone who has come to you and said their menopause symptoms are causing them problems'. There seems to be some guidance on reasonable adjustments you can suggest.

They are voluntary courses to sign up to though. This seems different to what others are discussing.

Large employer, very (old, senior) male dominated, very technical and specialised, hardly any women of any age. It's a joy to have a hot flush in that environment, I tell you.

I've not seen them mandatory anywhere.

This. People talk about Gen X onwards being the sandwich generations but elderly care was going on before that, women juggled that with childcare, housework, often some form of work, paid or voluntary
. My grandmother was balancing 3 kids, a full time job teaching & an ailing 90yo mother in hospital in the 1980s, the pressure was so much she had a stroke (she was OK thank goodness- and is still alive at 93, but it could easily have been different...)
I too have seen people say on here, 'My mother was often angry when I was a teen, we think now it was menopause etc' I mean, come on. Mothers of teens might have valid reasonably to be angry often..!

I personally think a lot of menopausal symptoms are exacerbated by stuff like UPFs and excess weight. There was less of this due to less sedentary lifestyles and UPFs in the past, and I think it's a mistake to assume women were as likely to have severe symptoms today.

I think it would be better if it was done with male health awareness too

so include the need for prostate checks, weight gain and health issues due to lowering testosterone that keeps getting lower, leading to high blood pressure, extra weight on the belly and erectile dysfunction

Wonder how the men like to have these issues discussed for awareness, with some 30yr old female colleagues present

all for awareness. The men would love it. Not.

I agree. Maybe just maybe women were angry because they were married to a useless sexist twat. Plus having to do the majority of all the crap, grunt work whilst their lazy dh say on his arse telling everyone that she was ‘menopausal.’

“DrumsPleaseFab · Today 07:36
I think it would be better if it was done with male health awareness too
so include the need for prostate checks, weight gain and health issues due to lowering testosterone that keeps getting lower, leading to high blood pressure, extra weight on the belly and erectile dysfunction
Wonder how the men like to have these issues discussed for awareness, with some 30yr old female colleagues present
all for awareness. The men would love it. Not.”

Absolutely! I think sensitive knowledge and awareness around menopause is important and i’m all for menopause champions. But i do think the pendulum has swung too far, particularly with very public discussion of what may or may not be happening to our vaginas (and the inaccurate “sexually washed up” subtext that comes with that). It makes menopausal women seem like accidents waiting to happen. I’m well into my 50s and post-menopausal now and absolutely love it. Could do with losing about 3 stone but honestly feel very confident in myself and powerful and enjoy sex more than ever now there’s no need to bother with contraception. I feel like i’m in a kind of prime.

@Dery i often feel like I am in prime too, but interspersed by the occasional day where I feel ancient AF 😁😁😁