SIL thinks I have over reacted banning her from my house

[Happyhorse222]

I have recently taken on a potentially dangerous horse. My horses are stabled at my home.

SIL and her daughter (10) come round regularly to see my horses. Anyway...they came round yesterday evening. In weeks prior everyone has been aware I am taking this horse in to see if I can get him to any fit state or if I will need to retire him to the field.

I specifically told SIL to let me know when she arrives as I will come out as the horse is currently stabled and I need to be in there with her and my niece to supervise at all times while she says hello to the other horses and I told her with no doubt whatsoever YOU DO NOT GO NEAR NEW HORSE OR NEAR HIS STABLE AS HE IS POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS AND HAVING A SETTLING IN PERIOD. She has a form for not listening to me previously- like my Shetland bites, nope they decided he looked too cute to so went and pet him and he bit. Or no you cannot ride my horse because he isn't a novice ride, to her continuously standing with her daughter saying just let her on him, you're being mean, isn't your auntie mean. No, I just don't want your child to fall off and hurt themselves badly?

You can then imagine how it went next. SIL didn't let me know on her arrival and niece walked past stable popped her head in and new horse kicked the door and went down for a bite at her hair.

She came out screaming at me. I asked her to politely leave the stables and my house and not to come back until she could follow clear instructions not putting her daughter in danger.

My husband is completely on my side but his mother has been on the phone saying I have ruined his nieces experience with horses and I need to allow her back to save her confidence with horses.

I have said absolutely fuck off basically until they can actually listen to me around my animals and my property and now his mother, sister and my niece are DISTRAUGHT.

Stupid is as stupid does! Keep them at Fuck offs length! They so not deserve to be around these precious animals

Ban until they can listen to very simple instructions. I wouldn't dream of turning up at someone's house and not knocking on the door to greet them. Even if they have to walk past the stable, it's basic manners!

First poster has it in one! SIL clearly has no concept of the damage horses can do. I'm sure SIL and MIL would genuinely be distraught if the horse bit a chunk out of your neice's head.

I would stress that your horses aren't pets and you aren't running a riding stable, so it's not suitable for guests to visit and "pat" the horses. If you wanted to smooth it over, you could offer to take niece to an actual riding school or a day out on a suitable horse (which her mother pays for!).

If they want niece to have confidence around horses, aunt needs to

pay for riding lessons
get a horse
find someone with friendly horses and agree to doing as they say.

As you are not a service providing these things, you don’t have to do it.

Silly sil. Should save listened to you

tho security wise not good anyone can just walk to your stables and you not know about it

*have listened to you

Don't back down. Not your fault sil is a fuckwit.

How ridiculous of them to say you’re somehow ruining your niece’s ‘confidence with horses’ when what your SIL is actually doing is making her over confident with them. Horses, especially those you’re not very familiar with, need a wary respect. They’re big, they can kick, they have massive teeth. A stable is not a petting zoo and horses are not Guinea pigs.

YANBU. You have been very responsible and proactive

It is like people who refuse to ask if a dog on a lead is OK to stroke - they just do it !!!!!!!

They will get over it or not. These people don't seem to understand that a horse can and will kill you...especially when stressed. Jesus.

Possibly forward these comments to your SIL and MIL for comment?

I absolutely agree. If the SIL is this idiotic, i can totally see her being the type to sue OP if the DD/DN gets injured.

Good for u don’t bow down to them. Animals first before stupidity. Tell sil and granny to take them to a kids riding school and don’t come back.

Poor you, you’re not going to win with this crazy family.

Niece gets hurt - your fault
Try to protect her - you’re mean

more distance between you and them the better

😂

Yeah. They have absolutely no horse sense 🐎Good on you for protecting everyone, especially the horse, who doesn't get consulted and needs your help more than humans who can't follow safety instructions.