Couple brags

[DallazMajor]

I may be just miserable and bitter but here goes.

it boils my piss when people refer to their OH as their “rock” and that they wouldn’t have got through “XYZ” without them.

A). Yes you would
B). How do you think it makes people who don’t have a partner feel.

Am I BU?

Comparison is the thief of joy in this case. Not at all fair to judge or compare.

I love to hear other people talk about their supportive relationships and I’m glad for them.
Are you single by choice or are you looking for a relationship but not found someone yet? This matters.
I hope you find what you want.

We had 2 couples over, who were both newly into their (2nd) relationships. We've been married for 45 years.
My god the amount of relationship showing off that went on. Very wearing

A. No I wouldn’t. Some situations my dh helped me through that no one else could.
B. I don’t care or give thought to anyone else’s relationship.

A. I once described my husband as the rock that my life is built upon. Its true. Without him it would have been a very different 28 years.

B. Irrelevant

I don’t think it would bother me but I don’t think I have ever heard anyone say it.

Heard at least four people say it about their dog.

I am happily long term single but most friends married.

A bit of a weird thing to say people cant express appreciation for their partner due to how single people might feel.

My mum died when I was in my 20s but I dont get furious with other people on every Mother's Day for daring to post about how much they love their mothers. I get it, even though it might hurt.

Your "triggers" are your responsibility to deal with, you cant expect the entire world to tiptoe around you and if you do expect that then be prepared for a life time of misery and offence I'm afraid

They’re just happy, surely, having presumably been through some hard times during the break up of their earlier relationships? Not ‘showing off’?

I would get through with my DH. I’m disabled and he’s my carer. I wouldn’t have a life without him, I’d have to lie in bed all day doomscrolling and waiting for an 18 year old to come over for 15 minutes and give me a microwave ready meal and my medication.

DH helps me get up and ready and takes me out, even if it’s just to sit in the garden on a nice day. He makes every day lovely. He is absolutely my rock. I would have zero quality of life without him.

Yes I’m being a misery. I’m fed up of having to do and cope with everything on my own. It becomes tiring yknow.

I mean I’m happy for them really. Honest. lol

It’s just one of those things people say. Why does it bother you? Are you reluctantly single? It’s the only thing I can think, and it does sound slightly bitter.

To turn positive comments about someone’s relationship into an assumed insult is quite the leap. Strictly speaking your option B should be ‘how do you think it makes people who want a partner and don’t have one feel’.

I am single (very much by choice - 28 years and counting) so don’t feel particularly envious of their situation.

You don’t have to be happy for them - it’s about you not being happy with your life

Sorry, I actually wrote “I wouldn’t get through without my DH” but it autocorrected.

YABU I think you’re focusing too much on the couple aspect. Anyone can have a rock and the rock can be anyone. Anyone can believe anyone got them through something.

My partner is my rock but he’s also my best friend and I don’t really have any other best friend or close friends, should I be jealous when people talk about their female best friends being their support network??? I don’t have a mum group etc that some people have.

My DH is my rock though. I’m a strong independently minded woman but we all need someone to lean on. For some that’s a friend or a sister or a mum. For me it’s my DH. I chose him exactly for those qualities.

How do you think it makes people who don’t have a partner feel.

People don't have to consider every nuance scenario before they speak. People would never be able to say ANYTHING of they had to consider X situation.

Its up to you to manage your emotions & your triggers, its not the responsibility of society to not upset you.

Learnt this after losing mum, its not up to people to stop talking about anything that reminds me of mum, Because if it was societies responsibility then itd be stupid. even asda needs to stop selling Lasagna because she used to love that! its up to me to manage that emotion.

Different scenario, same outcome. Im sorry that youre feeling this way; its not good, but only you can change it.

Don't bother me one bit how others talk about ther loved one, good for them.

Im single and very happy with my choice.

You 'may' just be miserable and bitter?

Ya think? 🤣

Sorry but your misery and bitterness is no-one else's problem or responsibility.

Id rather hear this then yet another story of a shitty relationship that the kids have been dragged into

YANBU in the sense that I suppose what they mean is "I'm so thankful I had DH/DP there with me" but it's just not the expression people use

they probably would have managed it alone as when you dont have a choice you find a way because humans are extraorindarily resilient. (In the vast majority of cases).

Is hearing their expression inducing anxiety about how you will cope with life's blows alone?

I’m long term single, and it doesn’t bother me at all. Good for them, there’s lots of lovely things about being single and self sufficient that I benefit from.

Besides, they’re hardly likely to write “Can’t bear the thought of spending another Friday fishing through the washbasket looking for This One’s skidmarked pants” on Facebook- it’s a very curated version of anyone’s life.

YABU because it shouldn’t bother you so much.

But I’ve never had anyone describe their partner/husband like that to me before.
I guess being in our early 30s, our generation doesn’t really feel that women need men.
I’d never describe my husband in such a vomit inducing way. If any of my friends did, I’m afraid I might start spontaneously throwing up! 🤮

I cannot bear people who say "we think x" or "we like y" all the time. They are two individual people with their own brains, not some Borg entity.

It makes me think they have zero personality/thoughts/opinions of their own. Probably also have a shared email and/or FB account too, ugh.

Why would someone else's strong relationship piss you off? It doesn't prevent you from being happy or doing exactly what you want in your life.

Are you the kind of person who hates other people's holiday photos?

The phrase 'boils my piss' absolutely disgusts me, so I suppose we're all different.

Everyone needs support of some kind at times in life. Whether it's from a parent, sibling, friend, partner - it doesn't really matter, but it's good to be grateful for the people we genuinely have in our lives.