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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbours trying to intimidate me over parking issues

272 replies

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 13:59

I live on a small estate where each house has a driveway that can fit 2 cars. There’s also room on the street, so every house can accommodate at least 3 cars. The driveways are single file, which means people sometimes have to move their cars around, but that’s never really been an issue. Just for context, I live alone, so it’s a bit easier for me. I’ve been here for almost 7 years and was quite happy until recently when my lovely neighbours moved away in November. My new neighbours moved in, we introduced ourselves, exchanged greetings when we passed by, and everything seemed fine. However, things took a turn in January when their son (they’re a couple with a son in his 20s) got a transit van for work.

At first, they parked both their cars in the driveway and the van outside their house, swapping them around like everyone else. But a few weeks later, he started parking it outside mine. I figured it was just a one time thing and didn’t think much of it, but then he kept doing it every day, sometimes leaving it parked there for several days in a row. The thing is, my front garden is small, so the van ends up blocking my living room window, and honestly, it’s not great to look at every single day. I didn’t mind him parking there every now and then, but I thought it was a bit inconsiderate to do it all the time while leaving their own window empty. It also meant that my guests had to park further down the road and walk, when before they could park right outside. It’s a public road, so I never told them not to park there, but I did politely ask if they could switch it with one of their cars. They said no because the drive wasn’t wide enough for the van, and if they parked it in front of their house, they’d have to keep moving it to get the cars off the drive.

They were parking one car on the drive and one on the road, so they didn’t have to move either of them. I explained that it blocked my view and wasn’t pleasant to look at all the time, but they just repeated that it wasn’t possible to move it. There’s a small lay-by in the next street (you can see it from both our houses, and you walk through a little alley to get there) that isn’t in front of anyone’s house, so I asked if he could park the van there, but they said it wasn’t possible in case tools got stolen, etc, so that was that, and I never mentioned it up again.

Honestly, it bugged me for a bit and definitely soured the relationship, but there wasn't much I could do, so I just tried to ignore it. Then in February, my friend decided to sell her car. It’s an old Toyota Aygo and was very cheap, so I thought I'd grab it as a little runaround. I live up in the hills which can be a hassle, especially when my car is in the garage as the local bus only comes every two hours, making it difficult to get around and manage work. The car has an MOT until next year, it's taxed and insured, and I've been parking it outside my house. My main car is on the drive. I won’t lie, it was nice not having to see a big van every day too so that was definitely a bonus. A couple of weeks after I parked the car there, my neighbour asked if it was mine. I said yes, and asked if everything was okay. They brought up the van and mentioned it was difficult for them since they had nowhere else to park. I suggested the lay-by again or said they could park outside their own house (like everyone else), but they weren’t happy and asked me to put it on my drive since I wasn’t using it every day. I told them no, sorry, but they have space outside their own house, and I’m parking my car in the space outside mine. I probably could have been nicer about it, but they didn’t seem to care when they were blocking my front window and making it difficult for my guests, so I didn’t have much sympathy for them.

Since then, tensions have been high, and they’ve asked me several times to move my car. Now, they’ve started to block my driveway with their van (not completely blocking it, but the back end is hanging over, making it difficult to get in and out), tossing rubbish into my garden, and just generally being rude and trying to intimidate me. The last time I talked to them was on Saturday when they jokingly threatened to tow my car away (I have cameras at the front of my house). They were laughing but I could tell it was a threat. I doubt they would act this way if I had a partner.

Am I being unreasonable for saying that if they keep this up, I’ll call the police?

OP posts:
Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:46

nomas · 18/03/2026 15:42

So they can park their van on their drive then? Why is this OP's problem?

She doesn't own the space outside her house though. She cannot dictate who parks where in the street – and neither can her NDN. It all seems unnecessarily petty.

BruFord · 18/03/2026 15:46

Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:40

OP mentioned they said the issue for them is that they can't swing their cars off the drive easily if the van was outside their house. Whereas it sounds like OP could still get hers off the drive without an issue.

Honestly, if a neighbour asked me to move my vehicle from a legitimate parking space outside their house because they didn't like the view I'd just laugh and think they were joking. Because, really, who does that?!

@Passingthrough123 The OP also has the right to park a car in that space though, doesn’t she. They can’t “reserve” it for their van.

The real issue is that they have three vehicles for one house so the van has to be parked elsewhere-wherever they can find a space. It may need to go in the laugh that the OP mentioned or further down the street.

ErlingHaalandsManBun · 18/03/2026 15:47

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 14:38

I didn’t get the car to stop them from parking there. I bought it as a little runaround, so I’d have a backup if my main car ever needed to go into the garage (which it did recently for over a week, making it difficult to get around and commute to work). My friend was selling it for a really low price, so I figured it was a good deal.

The fact that it kept them from parking there and blocking my view was just a nice bonus. I only asked them once, not several times either like you suggested. And I didn’t say they couldn’t park there. I politely asked if they could swap it with one of their cars, which I thought was reasonable. They declined, and I didn’t bring it up again.

They, on the other hand, have asked me multiple times to move the car and got nasty when I said no.

There was another post, identical to this only a little while back with someone having a neighbours van parked outside their house on the street. Saying exactly the same as you, so the same situation. The poster was asking AIBU to buy a cheap runaround to park on the road outside my house to stop them parking the van there? This was not you?

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:47

Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:40

OP mentioned they said the issue for them is that they can't swing their cars off the drive easily if the van was outside their house. Whereas it sounds like OP could still get hers off the drive without an issue.

Honestly, if a neighbour asked me to move my vehicle from a legitimate parking space outside their house because they didn't like the view I'd just laugh and think they were joking. Because, really, who does that?!

I don’t think you realise the size difference between a car and a van. The van fills up the whole window and blocks any view or natural light. It’s very, very different.

OP posts:
Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:47

BruFord · 18/03/2026 15:46

@Passingthrough123 The OP also has the right to park a car in that space though, doesn’t she. They can’t “reserve” it for their van.

The real issue is that they have three vehicles for one house so the van has to be parked elsewhere-wherever they can find a space. It may need to go in the laugh that the OP mentioned or further down the street.

Well she's reserving it for her runaround now, so it's never going to be resolved!

Howmanycatsistoomany · 18/03/2026 15:50

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:15

I’ve explained why I bought the car in my previous reply (sorry, not being rude, but a few people have said this so I’m just repeating myself)

You don't have to justify your decision to buy a second car OP.

I had a batshit neighbour in my first house - the day I was moving in she appeared at my door to tell me off for parking in front of her house 🙄She parked right in front of my house every single day while leaving not quite enough space for another car in front of hers. So I parked a street away and didn't say a word but when I got a company car I kept my old car taxed/MOTd and insured and parked it outside my house but positioned just so that she couldn't quite fit her car in front of her house. It stayed there until I moved about 12 months later. Worth every penny.

Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:50

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:47

I don’t think you realise the size difference between a car and a van. The van fills up the whole window and blocks any view or natural light. It’s very, very different.

I do appreciate the size difference, but if the road where it's parked is at the end of a driveway that's the length of two cars one in front of the other, I'm really struggling to see how it manages to fill up the whole window and block the light. Unless it's far bigger than a transit, like a removal lorry?

ChangeAgainAgainAgain · 18/03/2026 15:51

nomas · 18/03/2026 15:43

Why should she make her own life harder by having to move cars around when there is a perfectly good space outside her house?

Honestly the misogyny here is off the wall.

She wouldn't need to move cars around, since apparently she bought this car to use only when her main car is being repaired, so she could just park it behind her main car, which obvioudly wouldn't be there any time she needed to use it.

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:51

Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:41

If it truly wasn't your intention to buy the car and park it out front to annoy them, why not park it on your driveway with your other car?

Hold on, they can park their cars anywhere on the road, but I can't? And if I do, I'm just being petty and trying to get a rise out of them? Come on. This is very one sided.

OP posts:
ItsNotMeEither · 18/03/2026 15:52

If your second car truly is as you say, a backup, then surely it could go on your drive, then your every day car behind it. You say the driveway fits two cars. You wouldn't need to rotate your cars very often.

But, it's clear you like leaving it out the front.

Honestly, I kind of don't blame you, but, now you're in a bit of a situation. The question is, do you really want to resolve it?

If you want to resolve the issue, put both cars on your drive. If the neighbours park a car out the front of your place, fine. If they put the van out the front of your place, then put the back up car back there for a week. Repeat. The neighbours will eventually work out that if they put a car there, then all is fine, but if they put the van there, then they lose the spot for a week.

That said, you don't own the road and they are within their rights to park there. But, you really don't want this to escalate, so try to find a way to rub along together.

MyDeftDuck · 18/03/2026 15:53

Keep a diary of everything they do, say, imply etc. Whenever they chuck rubbish over take a photograph before putting it in the bin and take regular photos of your vehicles…..any damage that appears overnight should also be noted.

Although you can’t technically stop anyone from parking outside your property these neighbours do sound like they’re trying to intimidate you.

Do nothing to intimidate them.

If matters escalate you will have details of dates, actions, damage, threats etc .

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:53

ErlingHaalandsManBun · 18/03/2026 15:47

There was another post, identical to this only a little while back with someone having a neighbours van parked outside their house on the street. Saying exactly the same as you, so the same situation. The poster was asking AIBU to buy a cheap runaround to park on the road outside my house to stop them parking the van there? This was not you?

Someone else asked me that but no that’s wasn’t me! At least I’m not the only person dealing with crappy neighbours so that makes me feel slightly better. I’ll try and look for the thread now.

OP posts:
Uglydumpling · 18/03/2026 15:53

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:45

No that wasn’t me. It’s a shame someone else is going through the same thing. Neighbour disputes aren’t nice.

It was exactly same Issue with van and they were asking if they were out of order for getting cheap car and leaving it outside their house

firstofallimadelight · 18/03/2026 15:53

I’m guessing your estate is similar to mine, a small front that goes straight onto the road? So when he’s in front of your house he’s practically onto of your front window? No one on our estate parks outside someone’s house with out asking

latetothefisting · 18/03/2026 15:56

Tableforjoan · 18/03/2026 14:03

Keep a log of their behaviour.

Remind them that as long as the car has tax and mot you can park it there legally on the road just like they park their van or car.

That if they keep making threats and littering in your garden you will report them.

Added to this, depending on where they made the "joke" about having your car towed, I would tell them that was caught on camera - they don't have to know that your cameras don't have sound, for example. Will make them think twice about

No idea why people on this thread are being so interrogatory towards op - I doubt they would like a big van outside their window everyday! They are clearly the arseholes - they had multiple options for where to put their van but chose to inconvenience op rather than themselves.

If the son has his own business I'd be tempted to create an anonymous email address and leave a few bad Google reviews if he's listed as well (nothing mentioning his van but stuff like "did a really poor job" or "never returned my calls") but I'm a petty bitch....

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:56

firstofallimadelight · 18/03/2026 15:53

I’m guessing your estate is similar to mine, a small front that goes straight onto the road? So when he’s in front of your house he’s practically onto of your front window? No one on our estate parks outside someone’s house with out asking

Yes that’s right!

OP posts:
Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:57

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:51

Hold on, they can park their cars anywhere on the road, but I can't? And if I do, I'm just being petty and trying to get a rise out of them? Come on. This is very one sided.

You've misunderstood me. You're obviously getting harassed by them and it's upsetting you, so if I were you, I'd just let them crack on with the van and park mine both on the drive. But that is just me, because I prefer the quiet life and the view wouldn't bother me.

PrettyPickle · 18/03/2026 16:01

Is it a works van? My husband was only allowed to bring his works van home if he parked it on a drive due to the insurance. If its a big company, ring and ask for their fleet dept, do not give details and just ask if company vans have to be parked on a private drive over night?

GertieLawrence · 18/03/2026 16:01

I don’t blame you at all. I’d have bought the car JUST to park it there.

If I were in your situation, I would be very overt about recording things, I.e. I’d have an old fashioned notebook out in the front garden making notes if something happens, and I’d make a song and dance about taking photos of rubbish etc where they could see me.

Im not suggesting you do this because it might escalate further and that’s something only you should risk, but I’d be putting the wind up them.

BigAnne · 18/03/2026 16:04

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:47

I don’t think you realise the size difference between a car and a van. The van fills up the whole window and blocks any view or natural light. It’s very, very different.

Is the van unsightly?

WallaceinAnderland · 18/03/2026 16:08

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:56

Yes that’s right!

Maybe you could buy a second house for those times when your neighbours are annoying you.

WishingIwasyoungerandslimmer · 18/03/2026 16:08

Passingthrough123 · 18/03/2026 15:40

OP mentioned they said the issue for them is that they can't swing their cars off the drive easily if the van was outside their house. Whereas it sounds like OP could still get hers off the drive without an issue.

Honestly, if a neighbour asked me to move my vehicle from a legitimate parking space outside their house because they didn't like the view I'd just laugh and think they were joking. Because, really, who does that?!

Yes, anyone can park on the street so long as they don't block a drive.

But why is the van owner choosing every time to park in one particular spot, right outside the OP's house? Why are they not sharing the love and parking it outside other neighbour's houses as well?

They are doing it because the OP is a woman and the neighbour believes he is entitled to do what they want and she should just put up and shut up. I'm sure they wouldn't treat their male neighbours the same way.

To those questioning the OP's decision to get a second car and park it outside her own house. Why not? She doesn't need to justify why she needs another car. Her money, her choices. As some of you have said, anybody can legitimately park outside her house. Even the OP herself.

So stop with the snide remarks about the OP. It's just so ridiculous.

Lavenderandbrown · 18/03/2026 16:09

Puhhleez…of course people buy second cars for many reasons. I have a “spare” car my husband has 2 spare trucks. All of our cars have been owned for a long time. They do different jobs…convertible for summer /work truck / car for out of town visitors etc. @babasaclover this may be unsual to you but it very common.

op sounds to me like you followed MN advice and tried to talk with them. They declined to move thier ugly work van from your window to their own because they thought they didn’t need too. And when talking didnt work you foiled their CFery and bought another car. I disagree swap the cars regularly and carefully so they can’t try to get in the space.

Well done you.

CitizenofMoronia · 18/03/2026 16:10

WallaceinAnderland · 18/03/2026 16:08

Maybe you could buy a second house for those times when your neighbours are annoying you.

oh here we go, so now its second home shaming as well as second car shaming?? people have second homes!