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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbours trying to intimidate me over parking issues

272 replies

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 13:59

I live on a small estate where each house has a driveway that can fit 2 cars. There’s also room on the street, so every house can accommodate at least 3 cars. The driveways are single file, which means people sometimes have to move their cars around, but that’s never really been an issue. Just for context, I live alone, so it’s a bit easier for me. I’ve been here for almost 7 years and was quite happy until recently when my lovely neighbours moved away in November. My new neighbours moved in, we introduced ourselves, exchanged greetings when we passed by, and everything seemed fine. However, things took a turn in January when their son (they’re a couple with a son in his 20s) got a transit van for work.

At first, they parked both their cars in the driveway and the van outside their house, swapping them around like everyone else. But a few weeks later, he started parking it outside mine. I figured it was just a one time thing and didn’t think much of it, but then he kept doing it every day, sometimes leaving it parked there for several days in a row. The thing is, my front garden is small, so the van ends up blocking my living room window, and honestly, it’s not great to look at every single day. I didn’t mind him parking there every now and then, but I thought it was a bit inconsiderate to do it all the time while leaving their own window empty. It also meant that my guests had to park further down the road and walk, when before they could park right outside. It’s a public road, so I never told them not to park there, but I did politely ask if they could switch it with one of their cars. They said no because the drive wasn’t wide enough for the van, and if they parked it in front of their house, they’d have to keep moving it to get the cars off the drive.

They were parking one car on the drive and one on the road, so they didn’t have to move either of them. I explained that it blocked my view and wasn’t pleasant to look at all the time, but they just repeated that it wasn’t possible to move it. There’s a small lay-by in the next street (you can see it from both our houses, and you walk through a little alley to get there) that isn’t in front of anyone’s house, so I asked if he could park the van there, but they said it wasn’t possible in case tools got stolen, etc, so that was that, and I never mentioned it up again.

Honestly, it bugged me for a bit and definitely soured the relationship, but there wasn't much I could do, so I just tried to ignore it. Then in February, my friend decided to sell her car. It’s an old Toyota Aygo and was very cheap, so I thought I'd grab it as a little runaround. I live up in the hills which can be a hassle, especially when my car is in the garage as the local bus only comes every two hours, making it difficult to get around and manage work. The car has an MOT until next year, it's taxed and insured, and I've been parking it outside my house. My main car is on the drive. I won’t lie, it was nice not having to see a big van every day too so that was definitely a bonus. A couple of weeks after I parked the car there, my neighbour asked if it was mine. I said yes, and asked if everything was okay. They brought up the van and mentioned it was difficult for them since they had nowhere else to park. I suggested the lay-by again or said they could park outside their own house (like everyone else), but they weren’t happy and asked me to put it on my drive since I wasn’t using it every day. I told them no, sorry, but they have space outside their own house, and I’m parking my car in the space outside mine. I probably could have been nicer about it, but they didn’t seem to care when they were blocking my front window and making it difficult for my guests, so I didn’t have much sympathy for them.

Since then, tensions have been high, and they’ve asked me several times to move my car. Now, they’ve started to block my driveway with their van (not completely blocking it, but the back end is hanging over, making it difficult to get in and out), tossing rubbish into my garden, and just generally being rude and trying to intimidate me. The last time I talked to them was on Saturday when they jokingly threatened to tow my car away (I have cameras at the front of my house). They were laughing but I could tell it was a threat. I doubt they would act this way if I had a partner.

Am I being unreasonable for saying that if they keep this up, I’ll call the police?

OP posts:
Ohfudgeoff · 18/03/2026 14:54

Tbh neither of you or your neighbours sound great and both rather petty re: parking. Neither of you have the sole right to park a car on the road in a particular space. Anyone can park on a public street as long as they're being legal about it.

The litter thing - yeah that's isn't great either.

Put up a fence so the neighbours litter can't blow over or be easily dropped over.

Put up a hedge so you can't see the road from your window.

Smile and nod at the neighbours but don't bother engaging.

user1476613140 · 18/03/2026 14:54

I'll take parking issues over noise nuisance any day of the week!

Ohfudgeoff · 18/03/2026 14:56

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 14:16

Thank you that's a great idea. I've told them multiple times that the car is allowed to be parked on the road, but they just keep rambling on about the van. They could easily shift the van if they want to get the cars off the driveway (like everyone else has to) but they won't. It's really just laziness.

Lazier than getting a second car 'just because' ?

Happyjoe · 18/03/2026 14:56

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 14:16

Thank you that's a great idea. I've told them multiple times that the car is allowed to be parked on the road, but they just keep rambling on about the van. They could easily shift the van if they want to get the cars off the driveway (like everyone else has to) but they won't. It's really just laziness.

Not only keep log but record their voices on your phone when you can without being seen (as to not make them madder, not because it's illegal which it isn't) but catching the threats may be useful too.

Happyjoe · 18/03/2026 14:57

Ohfudgeoff · 18/03/2026 14:56

Lazier than getting a second car 'just because' ?

If I could afford it I would've got another car, just so I don't get a view and blocked daylight of a van that sits there for days at a time. They are entitled to do what they want, hey, so is everyone else.

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 14:57

babasaclover · 18/03/2026 14:46

@crispsbuttyyou have to admit you bought it to annoy them. No one has a spare car to use just in case 😂. That said if you’ve got footage of them throwing rubbish etc report them. That’s not on

Believe it or not, I actually know a few people who keep spare cars just in case. Nothing too fancy, just some cheap little runarounds. As I mentioned, I live up in the hills, and it’s always been a hassle getting around without a car (my job is 35-40 minutes away, and I’d have to catch 2 buses). Thankfully, my car has been pretty reliable for the past 5 years, but it’s getting older now, and things have started to go wrong over the last year or so.

I wouldn’t have bought one from a dealership or anything since they hike up the prices, but my friend was selling the Aygo really cheap, and I knew it had been well taken care of, so I thought it was a good deal. It’s an extra £17 a month for insurance and only £20 a year for tax. Repairs are v v cheap too. My mum will also use it when her car needs to go to the garage so it will be handy for both of us. Don’t get me wrong, I was glad I didn’t have to look at the van anymore, but that wasn’t the reason I bought it.

OP posts:
crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 14:58

bigboykitty · 18/03/2026 14:50

But you unfortunately started that process by asking them to move their son's van which was parked perfectly legally on the street outside your house.

Started what? I asked them a question, once.

OP posts:
crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:00

Ohfudgeoff · 18/03/2026 14:56

Lazier than getting a second car 'just because' ?

I’ve explained why I bought the car…

OP posts:
bigboykitty · 18/03/2026 15:00

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 14:58

Started what? I asked them a question, once.

Yes, which started the issues. It wasn't reasonable and you shouldn't have done it. Asking people not to park on the public highway because of your view is a dick move.

OriginalSkang · 18/03/2026 15:02

You sound ridiculous. Who buys a second car for when their main one has to go in the garage?! And you definitely started this by telling them where they could park on a public road!

TheDandyLion · 18/03/2026 15:02

You started the intimidation by asking them to move the van and they quite rightly said they didn't have to and you escalated it by buying a another car to claim a space that still isn't yours. Their behaviour now isn't acceptable but neither was yours.

whackwhackoops · 18/03/2026 15:02

Even if you did buy the car to stop them parking their van outside your window (when you asked politely once if they could park another one of their vehicles) then I say good on you. Unless people stand up to bullies they will continue to think they own the road.

Aslo, I would think that if they are worried about the theft of the van or equipment then isn't it more sensible to park it on their drive - that doesn't make sense to me!

WellThatsAlrightThen · 18/03/2026 15:04

Did you ask why they won’t park outside their own house?

JacquesHarlow · 18/03/2026 15:04

bigboykitty · 18/03/2026 15:00

Yes, which started the issues. It wasn't reasonable and you shouldn't have done it. Asking people not to park on the public highway because of your view is a dick move.

No it's not a "dick move", @bigboykitty .

Why are people trying to frustrate and attack the OP on this thread?

It's not hard to see where the van owning neighbour's mentality is coming from is it?!

So , let's recap:

  • Just because the van owner started to park there regularly, it does not form some unwritten covenant that he can park there forever. The OP is not inconveniencing him by choosing to park something close to her house which she has legally taxed and allowed to be on the road.
  • Just because the van owner is being belligerent, rude and intimidating, it does NOT mean it was caused by the OP. The OP is not here to accommodate others and their parking choices. If she chooses to buy a car and that changes his routine, he has a choice to suck it up and park outside his house, where there is plenty of room.
  • It is utterly BONKERS to me that people can't see the solution is clear - the van owner can park... outside his house!! It is not up to other houses to accommodate his right to a clear view. He bought the van, he can enjoy it in all its full glory right outside his window.

Why are people suggesting that @crispsbutty should somehow be meek, back down and move the car she's bought to another part of the street, just so that billy big balls with his van can continue to enjoy a clear space outside his front window?

This site is batshit sometimes I swear.

Passaggressfedup · 18/03/2026 15:06

You are paying tax and insurance on a car you don't need just to get a view out of your front window? Your choice but are you going to keep paying? Because the minute you stop, they will report it and if you get rid of the car, they rill make sure to park there, even if only to annoy you.

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:06

bigboykitty · 18/03/2026 15:00

Yes, which started the issues. It wasn't reasonable and you shouldn't have done it. Asking people not to park on the public highway because of your view is a dick move.

I believe it was a fair question, and a few others on this thread agree. You definitely have the right to your own opinion, no doubt about that. However, the key point is, I can't turn back the clock now. So does that imply that just because I "started the process," I should be threatened and harassed every time I see them? What do you think I should do from here?

OP posts:
SatsumaDog · 18/03/2026 15:08

They just don’t want a big van parked outside spoiling their view so decided to subject op to it. They can easily accommodate 3 vehicles in the space they have, they just choose not to. They are the dicks in this scenario, not op.

OriginalSkang · 18/03/2026 15:08

Maybe just sell the car you don't need and let them continue to legally park wherever they like?

JacquesHarlow · 18/03/2026 15:09

Passaggressfedup · 18/03/2026 15:06

You are paying tax and insurance on a car you don't need just to get a view out of your front window? Your choice but are you going to keep paying? Because the minute you stop, they will report it and if you get rid of the car, they rill make sure to park there, even if only to annoy you.

Username definitely checks out @Passaggressfedup : why ask all this?!

The OP is well aware of the cost of paying for and maintaining a second car.

She knows that as owners of a van which is taxed and insured, they can park their car there as soon as the second car moves.

BerryTwister · 18/03/2026 15:09

Obviously neither of you are breaking any rules, as pavement parking is open to everyone.

But most people like to be considerate to their neighbours. Just because something is legal, doesn't necessarily make it right.

OP's neighbours plonked a big van in front of her house rather than their own, blocking her view rather than their own. That is totally legal but also selfish. She asked them nicely not to do it, and they clearly demonstrated that their own convenience mattered more to them than a good relationship with their neighbour. Fine, that's their prerogative, but they can't have it both ways.

OP doesn't want her view blocked, and given that the neighbours have made it clear that they don't care about getting on well, it makes sense for OP to do what suits her best too. Why shouldn't she?

Both parties are thinking of themselves now. But the neighbours started it.

JacquesHarlow · 18/03/2026 15:10

BerryTwister · 18/03/2026 15:09

Obviously neither of you are breaking any rules, as pavement parking is open to everyone.

But most people like to be considerate to their neighbours. Just because something is legal, doesn't necessarily make it right.

OP's neighbours plonked a big van in front of her house rather than their own, blocking her view rather than their own. That is totally legal but also selfish. She asked them nicely not to do it, and they clearly demonstrated that their own convenience mattered more to them than a good relationship with their neighbour. Fine, that's their prerogative, but they can't have it both ways.

OP doesn't want her view blocked, and given that the neighbours have made it clear that they don't care about getting on well, it makes sense for OP to do what suits her best too. Why shouldn't she?

Both parties are thinking of themselves now. But the neighbours started it.

Wonderful post and completely sums up the order of things here.

ProfMummBRaaarrrTheEverLeaking · 18/03/2026 15:10

TheDandyLion · 18/03/2026 15:02

You started the intimidation by asking them to move the van and they quite rightly said they didn't have to and you escalated it by buying a another car to claim a space that still isn't yours. Their behaviour now isn't acceptable but neither was yours.

Edited

Asking your neighbour a polite "would you mind" = intimidation!!

I've heard it all now 😂😂😂😂

It would have been intimidation had the OP kept going on and on at them, made it difficult for them to move their vehicle, "joked" about having it towed, and chucked her rubbish into their garden, and....oh hang on. She didn't do that.

THEY did.

Letsbe · 18/03/2026 15:10

Could you afford to get a cheap van or even better bus and park that outside there house?

isthatmytrainleaving · 18/03/2026 15:12

OriginalSkang · 18/03/2026 15:02

You sound ridiculous. Who buys a second car for when their main one has to go in the garage?! And you definitely started this by telling them where they could park on a public road!

Do you think all garages either stock all parts or can get parts the same day? I sold a car that was problematic and that was sitting in a garage for at least 2 days every time something went wrong with it due to the age of the car. We had a second car but Dh needed that for his commute which was 40 minutes in the car.

A massive van parked outside your house does block the view far more than a car does. The question is why didn't they want it parked outside their own house? Yes they can park where they want but come on, common courtesy would tell you to park it outside your own house.

We moved to a house where no one can do this to us anymore after we had neighbours whose drive could fit 3 cars wide, who always parked their 2 cars on it, started parking in front of our house to try to intimidate us.

crispsbutty · 18/03/2026 15:12

OriginalSkang · 18/03/2026 15:02

You sound ridiculous. Who buys a second car for when their main one has to go in the garage?! And you definitely started this by telling them where they could park on a public road!

Who buys a second car for when their main one has to go in the garage?! I did, along with a couple of other people I know. My mum will also use it from time to time. We're not all the same, you know?

I didn't tell them where they could park, either. I just asked nicely if they could swap the van for their car. They said no, and I said okay. That was it.

OP posts:
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