To ask if anybody actually enjoys parenting toddlers?

[huk]

Does anyone actually enjoy parenting toddlers? I’m actually miserable because of my toddlers behaviour, which isn’t me trying to ‘blame’ them; the responsibility for the behaviour ultimately lies with me but the crying and whining and screaming and inability to reason with them is just getting to me. I feel absolutely trapped in a screaming prison.

Yeah, OP isn’t the issue in this exchange.

Completely child dependent. Mine were all awful as toddlers 🫠. However I would watch other same-age children each morning at the Sure Start centre and marvel at how lovely and well behaved and cute they were. Mine were also v cute and now I look back at pictures I am extremely nostalgic…but omg the reality was the trenches. They were all feral, stubborn, prone to multiple tantrums a day, physically and emotionally intense. Two have been diagnosed as ND so maybe that was the difference, and I could see it at a young age but didn’t recognise it. It was relentless, both mind numbing and overwhelming at the same time. I can’t imagine teenage years being worse tbh but who knows.

Yes, loved it! They were cute and hilarious. Yes there was the occasional tantrum and the fussy eating, but they were largely fun.

Case in point proven again, other mothers piling on each other. It really does give motherhood a bad name. Enjoy your pack mentality, but your a bully, enjoy being that way, hope it makes you feel better.

I would go through the toddler stage 20 times over if it meant I could avoid the teenage stage!

My dd are 12 and 14 now.

Dd1 was hard work as a toddler, an absolute liability with no attention span who stopped napping at 18 months. Later found to be autistic. 1-4 was so hard and I regularly cried.

dd2 was a joy, very easygoing, interested in everything, quick to learn and made me feel like a good parent.

They were both v fussy with food to be fair and both had sleep issues but nothing unusual.

their personalities are the same now.

It is factually true, that I have been tutted and huffed at in public, I know several other people that have had the same experience because of typical toddler behaviour. That is a fact not an opinion. I was merely stating that if everyone was honest with themselves we would all admit that toddlers can be hard work, and mothers should be supportive of each other instead of judging. But as I can see by the comments that is not going to happen anytime soon. If the OP is finding dealing with a toddler difficult when alone, I think it is because subconsciously as a society we are conditioned to think a toddler can perhaps behave better than they can/should, if the OP can recondition her thinking that her toddlers actions are normal development milestones, then looking at it that way may make it easier to deal with, by removing the stress that they should perhaps be behaving differently. But hey you right I am a bad, terrible person for trying to think rationally about stuff.

I absolutely loved it. Hard work though.

But you’re still inferring things as truths that aren’t.

You thought toddlers were hard, OP does, many people do not so no we don’t have to “be honest” because our experience is different.
I don’t think OP has received a single judgmental post.
She said your post didn’t resonate with her and you doubled down and made it seem like she was lying and unkind.

You’re lashing out emotionally and frankly it’s bizarre, no one called you a terrible person but literally for the third time in one post and more than that overall you’re repeating that you’re the only one in the right and the only rational person. 🤦‍♀️

Again point proven. Mothers need to stop the pile on. This is why people struggle. Even rational posts are twisted about. People need to look at why the voice of reason is always made to look like something else. No one wants to hear it. No one wants to hear that typical toddler behaviour can be difficult. Everyone is looking for a quick fix. I am here to tell you there isn't one, the time will pass and things will get better. I won't be made to feel bad about saying that because it is FACTUALLY true!

Your opinions are subjective not fact, you've had a different experience to the OP so just leave it at that instead of telling her how she should feel about her own experience.

On FFS you’re quoting me and when I answer you I’m piling on. 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
You’re not the voice of reason you’re actually coming across as quite unhinged refusing to accept that several posters now just have a different opinion to you.

I loved the exploration with toddler stage (mealtimes were horrific though 😳). 8/9 I still fondly remember as The Shouty Phase - child shouting, not me!

OK we shall have it your way. We will just pretend that toddlers don't go through certain milestones and developmental leaps that are challenging to most parents that are listed in any parent/baby/toddler book that you may pick up. You've won congratulations! Perhaps the authors of those books should be sued for misinformation to the general public. Off to enjoy what's left of mothers day now. Enjoy feeling smug you won the argument bye bye 👋

I have loved ages 1-3 x 2. Youngest is still a toddler and is just heaven. I could keep him at age 2 forever.

Age 3 to 5 was however horrendous with DC1 and may well be with DC2 as well (they are quite similar characters). I would have a billion 2 year olds but age 3-5 with DC1 has made me firmly done with 2. It’s so child dependent.

Agree some toddlers are easy some are not, hang in there op, my first was soooo determined , temper tantrums aplenty really hard work , second child had one temper tantrum then never had another!
I could just say let’s go out now and lift the second one whereas the first would have had meltdowns at so many things. The only saving grace I would say op is she has done very well career wise because of that same determined nature and never gave me any concerns as a teenager (she must have got out all the anger in the terrible twos and threes ) 😃

Thanks all, I’ve had a challenging few weeks. She must have sensed I’d written this as she’s been delightful this evening and actually ate her dinner - woohoo. Feeling a bit better now. But man, it’s been a tough fortnight. I don’t know if I’m reassured by those who have loved it or if I want them to slip on an icy puddle.

I’m currently going through the same with my 2.5 yr old. Absolutely everything is a battle & the tantrums are ramping up.
He had a massive melt down this morning because he asked for cornflakes (which I gave him) then decided he didn’t want them & was so offended that I’d given him the breakfast that he’d asked for. I took them away, this caused him to shout & cry even louder asking for them back, he then proceeded to eat the entire bowl & asked for more 🤦‍♀️ why did we have to go through all that! Pre 8am.
Good job he’s cute & gives good cuddles after driving me literally insane most days.

I loved the toddler stage. Yes there were hard days, but overall it was wonderful

I was often tempted to sell my teens on Ebay though. It was horrendous. I honestly think you either get easy toddlers who are nightmare teens or vice versa.

They are young adults now and mostly delightful.

I found toddler years so much easier than teen years!

I found them absolutely fascinating. One of mine has ADHD and was a particularly interesting toddler!

I loved the baby years and the toddler years.

It was the teenage years that brought me to my knees!!

This is so refreshing to hear so many people loving the toddler years I always read how awful they are and felt like I was on my own for loving it! Give me toddlers any day. Such a fun and simple time.

The whole thing was never-ending torture. I loved the teenage years though.

I absolutely loved parenting toddlers, all 4 of mine were pretty easy right enough. I found it easier to just go with the flow and accept they'll make a mess etc, I was very much the cheery fake it til you make it mum. But it worked an absolute treat, no angry words, just happy calm chat. They're now 17, 15 and 11yo twins. They've told me that's exactly what they needed.

No I really disliked it and struggled a lot with just how loud, unreasonable, emotional and confrontational they can be!!

Mine was such hard work u til about age 4. very headstrong, would run off all the damn time but would NOT be restrained in any way. Lots of whinging and whining and being a general noisy pain in the arse.

Its hideous at the time but does pass relatively quickly (thank god)

one of the reasons I only had one child. Never again!