AIBU - Mother’s Day for ‘women who have chosen not to be mothers’

[Hedgehoggin]

Scrolling through Instagram this morning and I’ve seen some Mother’s Day content - AIBU to think that ‘women who have chosen not to be mothers’ being celebrated on Mother’s Day is just bonkers?

Every year social media seems to have more of this desperate pleading to remember everyone else that there is celebrating actual mothers. It makes the people who should be celebrated feel awkward and small.

This picture does do not do that though.

Guys, it's an ai generated piece of digital tat. Not worth a brain cell worth of thought.

I’m not a runner by choice and would’nt expect to be ‘thought of’ or ‘celebrated’ on international runners day….

I have read the word 'mum' so much over the last two days that it's become almost like a babble word that a baby comes out with...mumumumumumumum 😆.

And their “choice” isn’t really a choice at all.

Does it really matter that one social media post from one tabloid newspaper professes to be ‘thinking of’ other women as well as celebrating mothers? Who cares? It’s not that deep.

Ummm what. Choosing means exactly that, that you didn’t want to be a mum. And that’s fine. It doesn’t mean you get a special Mother’s Day category. If you didn’t choose and it didn’t happen that’s obviously sad, but really this day is not about you. Being a mum is damn hard and it’s one bloody day! I don’t even want a big thing about it but sheesh can we not celebrate mums on one day?

This picture one of many, but also a good example of a total waste of time.

“Think of” what does that even mean? I have an acquaintance who lost her son 10 years ago.
Did I naturally wake up this morning thinking “oh Jane. She must be so sad today” no, I didn’t I’m afraid.
My own kids were there giving me breakfast and pressies.
Later I saw Jane has posted something similar and briefly thought “oh how sad”

what was even the point? It’s just a fleeting thought, it benefits no-one and serves no purpose. Some meme reminding me to do it is pointless laxivism.

There are two other categories in the graphic that could be aimed at people who are not mothers.

Why the big fuss over just the one?

I agree with this - let mums have one bloody day

And don’t give the crazies anymore ideas…….

It’s quite simple;

It’s “Mothers Day”.

It’s be nice to your mum day, and be appreciated if you are a mum day.

Honestly, no one is forcing anyone to do anything.

My DH and my DC are making me feel special today, and no one is going to take that away from me. It’s “my” day.

I am a mum, and it is the best thing I’ve done. I’m good at it, and honestly just f*ck off with undermining the contribution mums make to society, which is massive.

God forbid actual mothers, you know the ones who risked their own lives making humans and then likely did the donkey work of raising them get a day to themselves, those selfish cunts, what are they thinking!?

Oh wait youre the horribly selfish person for trying to appropriate their day so that you can virtue signal.

Women who have lost their children are still mothers.

I'm child free by choice and I think the 'those who have chosen not to be a mum' on that pic is unnecessary. I'm not a mother and that's okay - I don't need to be celebrated or acknowledged today! All of the mums doing their best every day to parent their children to the best of their ability - it's your day today. I hope all the mums today have a lovely day. ❤

Although my husband did get me a mother's day card from the dog, just as a bit of fun 😂

This is why it was often called Mothering Sunday, to recognize the work of mothering rather than affirming everyone’s sense of self or whatever this nonsense is.

It’s actually about celebrating your mother church, origin wise. A vicar told me about it and I was really suprised

But you hadn’t yet met your child before you decided to get pregnant and ‘risk your life’ so it’s not the heroic act you think it is lol

You haven't contributed more to society just because you're a mother! Nobody has said that mothers shouldn't be celebrated today, not once. People have said that this commercialised, over-advertised day can be really really hard for some people.

Some of those people have lost children, babies and pregnancies. Some people chose not have children because they have a chronic illness. Some people have very complex relationships with their own mother.

Just because it is now a day that has been brought into society in this way and everybody is supposed to just accept it, doesn't mean that people dont struggle with it.

My SIL chose not to have DC. She is an amazing DM and DGP to not only her step-DC (and GC) but also their two half siblings (who are essentially my DB's ex stepDC).
My DB was married to the bio mum for three years thirty five years ago. He took on full responsibility for her two elder DDs after she left him with 4 DC, only two of which were biologically his and ran of with OM (their bio DF had not seen them in years at this point). That lasted about ten minutes, but she never returned for her 4DC.
DB raised the DC alone until he met his DW (SIL) about thirty years ago. All four DC call her by her name but she is grandma to their DC. She has been there for every milestone and helped each plan their weddings.
DB and SIL are a wonderful blended family. You'd have no idea they arent biologically related to two of his DDs and that SIL isn't to any of the now adult DC.
I'd tell anyone to fuck off if they questioned why SIL will receive four sets of Mother's Day cards and gifts today or why she is celebrating.

I don’t see the big deal. Women who have lost their mums don’t necessarily have children, but it’s a tough day for them probably. Women who have chosen not to have children still have a mum out there to honour or not, and it’s a day for them to as someone with a mother. I can’t get worked up about this. Everyone who is alive has a mother. Regardless of whether they have children of their own.

Yes, I even referred to them as mothers in my post.

I've lost my mother, I am step mother and have chosen not to be a mother.myself. I couldn't give a fuck about Mother's Day.

Not everyone needs prizes all of the time.

As someone child free by choice, I don’t want to be included in Mother’s Day thank you. I doubt anyone else who is wants this.