The hatred and venom on here is too much

[femaleofsubstance]

This site used to be light relief anf fun. The odd bitchy thread but on the most part was fun to read and made me smile.

It's become so emotionally toxic and down right nasty. Thead after thread of micro aggresion.
Too much for me, i feel so drained after just 15 mins.
Just why?

The worlds is a shit place at the moment - I know most people are bumbling along ok but the Gov decisions are so pathetic and spineless -there’s nothing to feel pleased or happy about -or optimistic -internet/ techbros / SM control so much - and the Gov pisses about doing woke stuff and bullshitting and pretending that they’ve actioned stuff but anyone can see life isn’t going to improve and with this war it’s going to get harder.

That plays out into people’s grumpy posts.

and no one give me a list of all the Gov has done without also giving me a list of what they’ve failed at.

No I’m happy to judge others for the meaning behind the words they use. Spelling something wrong or using an apostrophe in the wrong place doesn’t have any meaning or bad intention behind it

I agree. I sometimes misspell words on MN. I often have to edit my posts. I just don’t judge people who use words like obtuse as doing so because they are being “spiteful for no reason”. It’s double standards

IME, the 'Mumsnet of old' was nowhere near as wittily hilarious as some people seem to think it was. An environment where people hold court whilst certain others treat them with a bizarre kind of reverence is odd to me.

The live chat facilities on AOL had siimilar dynamics only far, FAR more toxic. By comparison, the live chat rooms of old make discussion forums like this look like Mary Poppins' nursery.

This site just got far bigger and those dynamics shifted - and not all for the worse as far as I can see. You meet rude dickheads in every walk of life: public transport alone is worse than MN these days.

I saw some insta video the other day and it was of kids in the 80s saying something like are yoj telling me in future that we wont be plahing ojt in steet u til the kights go out, or fhat in the future we wont be knocking on doors but calling someone on a box (e.g. a phone)

This thread makes me think of that and think of the reverse, people who post awful comments on platforms like this would never be saying this in real life to their friends, family or colleagues. There is no way they would keep on repeating the same toxic negative rubbish cos their friends and family would have long ago told them to shut up sick of hearing about it and would have been out off by the endless negativity.

Dont get me wrong we had magazines and of course gossiped but my god the Internet and anonymity takes it to another level. If on sm platforms you could neber hide behind a username and it was always your real name...how much of what people say would still be said....

It would be nice if trolling, and toxicity could be removed and the Internet go back to being a useful tool it started off as

Most SM sites have their peak popularity lifespan and MN, in its heyday, had probably reached theirs hence the owners apparently wishing to offload. I think a load of what is posted now is pure click bait, automated or otherwise, just to drive traffic - so many generic MIL/dog/teacher bashing threads with identikit OPs and responses - it has become boring

Pretty much. I suspect that these days a good degree of content is also bot-generated.

A male friend of mine was beaten up in a random attack a few years ago.
He sustained serious injuries.
He has felt pretty unsafe since.

Ignore the haters and move onto to loving interests.

Adjust your settings

Fora and Forums can both be used for the plural. Though the usage is being increasingly separated between academic papers that use fora and Internet posts on forums that use, well, forums. Interestingly, referendum does not have this freedom to interchange. When you know exactly how many there are the plural is referendums, but when it is just a general plural it is referunda. This was subject to public debate in Ireland when we had two referendums in one vote. We were educated as a population.
Hope this is helpful and not micro aggressive.

You can avoid the toxic threads and go to the uplifting ones. There was one where everyone posted pics of their pets. Only the Internet can bring a hundred cute pets into you life before breakfast.

Possibly. It’s certainly true that one does not listen to what is said irl when it’s shouted because priority shifts to dealing with the anger and de-escalating the situation. The worst way to get your point across irl is shouting and abuse of anyone who disagrees with you - and equally, the more difficult you find life the more frustrated you are likely to get, so it’s a closed loop. And there is the internet which pretty much permits any degree of harpy like behaviour. Enshittification ensues.

People find it easier when they can hide behind something to truly say what they think, there are people on here who openly say they find trashing people entertaining and hilarious to watch someone's downfall. Imagine you actually saying that allowed to your family and friends tbh if someone said that to me id be stepping back from them...to take delight and find it entertaining to bitch about someone continually isnt the type of person I want to be around

@GoldBthehypo Nope. That is a complete fabrication. Nobody on MN is saying that they “find trashing people entertaining and hilarious to watch someone's downfall”.

Mumsnet is an information and advice resource for mums/ parents that offers topic based discussion on a range of themes beyond mums or parental topics.

Why would you go to a discussion forum and object to discussion if what you want is lighthearted fun? There are other places for that both on and offline.

Mumsnet posts are a mixed bag. Interesting to note one if not two on this thread I recognise for persistent unnecessary nasty edged comments in response to posts on AIBU or other topics. There will always be some whose default stance is aggressive or condescending and will target others, particularly those who are less so.

I’ve been on mumsnet for 20 years started when my kids were little. I don’t come on very often now, my kids are now in their mid twenties .

I think in many ways it’s less combative it used to be incredibly cliquey and lots of who’s your favourite poster threads . There was a breakaway group the mouldies ,I think they were called that set up a Facebook group to talk about other members , that caused mayhem!

Now I think sometimes it appears to be actually a bit tamer and softer in someways ,lots less cliquey but a bit more petty a lot of fault finding and nit picking .

I still like a browse and love the wit and humour and the support that women can often give each other .

Have tou seen every thread on this site to know that for certain? Because i have seen it.

Where have you seen it? Do you have a link?

I’ve obviously not read every thread, but I’ve been on MN from the very start and have not seen this once.

Hahaha you started a thread on MN about the petty nastiness, the bitchiness, the bullying.

Yes it is rife on here. But people can hide behind a made up name and goad and pick on people and argue with them to win some point that only they care about. (Probably sitting on their sofas with nothing else to do but upset a stranger somewhere who they can imagine isn’t a real person with real feelings).

Yes you are right and I generally agree that MN has become a not very nice place to chat and ask questions about things that are bothering you. It used to be, but not anymore.

I think it probably is, though I’m not, so I don’t know. I do remember passing a bar called Stramash in Edinburgh, and wondered if it was aptly named, but didn’t have the nerve to investigate.