Hens still havent paid me back?

[MyPurpleHeart]

I'm going away on a hen trip for my cousins wedding. When we booked it I paid for the brides share up front with the agreement the hens would pay me their share back. This was 6 months ago. We are a month out and despite me asking a few times, none of the hens have paid me yet. AIBU to ask for this to be paid within the next week? I have expenses for the trip which I was planning to cover with this that I cant yet. For context its around £400

Message each one separately not in a group chat. More difficult to ignore a direct message.

Sounds like they didn't really want to pay for the bride as well. Maybe say you'll have to ask her to pay for herself now since nobody wants to pay for her anymore. Maybe that will chivvy up some payments.

Tell them that unless you receive full payment by the end of the week you’ll have to start cancelling some of the aspects of the weekend ie move to cheaper accommodation, take away rather than restaurant meals.

Just tell them they have till friday if it’s not paid then the bride will unfortunately need to pay for herself.

Have they paid for themselves and not the bride? Or not paid for any of it?

I wouldn't say nobody has paid me back because they sly fuckers will be glad they're not being singled out and think safety in numbers.
Send a group message and saying you agreed X moths ago on this trip and costing but some people have not paid despite x requests previously. Lack of payment by X date will unfortunately mean the trip will have to be cancelled. Then whatsapp them individually asking for payment. This bit is key because some sly fucker is hoping X people have paid and youve lost track of who has and hasn't.

Huge, huge mistake not getting the payment up front. You might get it from a few people but you are definitely not getting your £400 back.

I would say something like this and to each person individually.

I would be a lot more blunt if I were you. If it's only £20 pp, they probably think it can wait.
I assume they have incurred costs as well?

I'd make it clear that you are £400 down, and that it's now been 6 months waiting their share. That you want the amount transferred by the end of the week, or the trip will unfortunately have to be cancelled. Then share a spreadsheet with all their names, and tick as they pay.

Hi everyone, as agreed, everyone still owes me £20 for their share of Jenny’s costs. I paid this upfront 6 months ago, so please can everyone do a bank transfer by this Friday 5pm latest. My bank details are: XXX. Thanks all!

Just say you're having to cancel the trip as you've been left out of pocket for six months and you'll get round to refunding everyone eventually.

And has anyone got any thoughts what to do for the hen weekend cheaply as clearly everyone is struggling with money

Oh and add the bride to the group for that if she isn't already.

I would get on to them straight away, say you're £400 out of pocket and that you need it immediately. It's only £20 to each of them but adds up to a lot for you. They probably don't even know no one has paid you back.

£20 each is hardly significant for each of them. I don't understand why they have not yet paid. Get at least one person to pay you, and then name that person as having paid and the rest as not having paid. Be very specific. Each one is hoping you think they have paid (or think they have paid, but haven't). Without pointing fingers, nothing will happen.

You just need to be really blunt now.

Check the cancellation policy! And cancel it if you can.

“Hi Everyone, thank you to those who’ve paid up so far. Can I ask those who haven’t yet paid to pay £ [amount] into my account [detail] by Friday latest. This is the amount everyone agreed to contribute to cover [brides] share and I paid it upfront 6 months ago, so would like to settle up. I have sent a few reminders, but if I haven’t received payments by Friday then there we may need to let [bride] know [that her hen has to be cancelled as her share hasn’t been covered] [that some people didn’t pay up and that she’ll have to pay the difference].”

the implied naming and shaming should encourage those who haven’t paid to cough up

Me too, I was just going to say to give it more time, they will lay eggs eventually.

Infuriating. You need a strong message now:'I paid for the brides share 6 months ago and noone has paid me back. I need the money so please let me have it by Friday.' Then another reminder on Saturday if necessary.

Make it absolutely clear that you are £400 out of pocket because of their behaviour. Each of them will be thinking individually 'oh its just 20 quid, I can pay her when i see her'. They need to be shown the bigger picture - you are £400 out of pocket.

Me three!!

I was about the say exactly the same thing. You are far more likely to get a response if you message them individually. In a group setting they can see that no one else has replied so it’s easy to blend in. If you message them one-to-one they can’t avoid you as easily plus it might give them the impression they’re the only one left that hasn’t paid.

Another vote for posting to say you are going to ask the bride to pay for herself, I wouldn't piss about with individual messages or chasing any longer.

This 100%

Just say they have until ** date to pay and then you’ll be asking the bride to pay for herself.

Personally I think it’s cheeky to ask to cover the bride’s cost even if others have done this previously. Life’s getting more and more expensive, fair enough if people are feeling the pinch.

Sent everyone a Paypal request with their share.