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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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No, Dubai.. we’re not jealous. We’re just exhausted by the algorithm shoving endless, braggy content down our feeds during what might be the start of a world war, one that already involves British people on the ground.

549 replies

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 06:51

I’m venting here, as a former expat sick of being pushed content from influencers who know nothing about the realities of living there under terms that don’t involve government cash to push a blindfolded, tone deaf narrative.

Dubai is the ultimate symbol of moral compromise, a glossy façade masking hypocrisy. Nowhere else do you see people who once mocked or feared Muslims flocking to Muslim lands to live comfortably off their wealth.

Certain professions thrive in their own sheltered bubbles, teachers, for example, rarely look beyond their privileged expat circles.

Parents who gush about loving their children casually employ underpaid nannies, often Filipina women who’ve left their own children behind. The usual defence? “She earns more here than back home.” Conveniently ignoring the exploitative system that brought her there. Hypocrisy in full view.

In a supposedly Muslim state, the same rules of faith vanish when profit or expat comfort is at stake. Alcohol flows freely, prostitution thrives, gambling exists, pork is sold, and dogs fill parks, all justified under the umbrella of “keeping expats happy.”

Many defend the government’s heavy control as if to prove their choice to stay is right. They need that illusion. Meanwhile, the state ensures expats feel “safe” because their satisfaction is profitable.

What influencers call “hate” toward Dubai isn’t jealousy. It’s frustration, frustration at how proudly expats flaunt a lifestyle while belittling their home countries, still benefiting from UK systems without paying a penny of tax. It’s tone-deafness wrapped in sunshine and skyline filters.

I know because I lived there. I arrived with good intentions to work hard, save, go home. But within a few years, I was buried in credit card debt, battling an eating disorder, and clinging to delusions just to survive mentally.

It’s easy to adopt the spin/ the narrative of safety, success, and superiority, because the system is designed to make you believe it.

People are tired of the influencer nonsense: clickbait, fake engagement, pretentious “Dubai life” hype. Every smug clip of a sunset or a skyline feels like rubbing salt in collective anxiety, especially while the UK faces uncertainty, fear, and political messes. The contrast feels cruel.

Dubai isn’t a real place, it’s a business model. A well-oiled corporation with immaculate branding and impeccable control over perception. It’s proof that humans will do almost anything for money.

They’ll mute moral conflict, ignore exploitation, and call it “success.”

Expats boast about how “safe” Dubai is compared to the UK, but that’s a narrow kind of safety, street-level safety, not emotional, financial, or existential safety. Is your job secure? Is your mental health stable? Are your rights protected? Safety for whom, the western professionals or the migrant workers living without basic freedoms?

In my view most expats won’t return home. Some can’t afford to. Debt, or the fear of losing status keep them trapped. Others left with problems they can’t face back in the UK. Many still defend Dubai fervently because admitting the truth would unravel years of self-justification.

It’s not far from a cult, everyone repeating the same comforting lines while ignoring what’s right in front of them.

I spent just over three years there. My profession wasn’t part of a protected bubble, so I met people from all walks of life. That distance gave me perspective. I changed, and yes, I too once repeated the same scripted defence to friends back home. It was easier to mask my unhappiness than face it.

Rant over.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Girlwithavibe · 06/03/2026 09:18

Almost everything that is posted on socials including Dubai or random snaps are SMOKE & MIRRORS
I am not on any social media ! And once u come off u can see how algorithms work even when your scrolling news !! It's actually scary 😟

CruCru · 06/03/2026 09:18

Strawberryfruitstarburst · 06/03/2026 07:17

You need to get off social media or delete your cookies and refresh your algorithm.

”We” are not all being bombarded with this rhetoric.

I was going to say something a bit like this. I have heard of influencers but I am yet to encounter one. If you get a load of these people on your Instagram feed then it is because you watch some of them so it feeds you more.

Damdamdamdaaaam · 06/03/2026 09:19

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 08:49

…the focus of this post is about the influencers. Which is backed up by my frustrations based on my own lived experience there. I do not follow influencers. I am not actively searching influencers, yet they are pushed to my feed. Are you one of the “influencers”? Is that why you’re so hurt by the views expressed in this thread?

You literally said above that you are srarching for that content. So of course content like that will be on your feed!
Honestly, you must be trolling.

And no I am not one of the influencers😂 I also have lived in experience there, still have many friends and some family there so I don't need to search insta for "news" like a sucker.

Jlom · 06/03/2026 09:20

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 08:49

…the focus of this post is about the influencers. Which is backed up by my frustrations based on my own lived experience there. I do not follow influencers. I am not actively searching influencers, yet they are pushed to my feed. Are you one of the “influencers”? Is that why you’re so hurt by the views expressed in this thread?

Influencers are just marketing people selling you stuff. Their job is advertising. It is the equivalent to getting angry when your 'lived experience' of a washing powder doesn't wash quite as white as the advert claims.

Usernamenotfound1 · 06/03/2026 09:22

Rattletattles · 06/03/2026 08:56

I lived in Dubai for a few years, I didn’t love it, I didn’t hate it, maybe because I knew it was a 4 year stint. However we did enjoy our time there, and I can see why people do love it and either want to move there or never want to set foot there again.

I do agree with you on the influencer thing, but its not just Dubai, its gotten out of hand everywhere, I tune out now to brands using influencers and nepo babies, and to be honest the Dubai Brit influencers getting thei moment in the Daily Mail, are very much the low hanging fruit when it comes to influencers.

As for migrant workers, it’s always used as a moral stick to criticise the UAE. I currently live in a very rich country which is full of undocumented Filippino nationals, who came here voluntarily on ‘holiday visas’, with the plan to stay so they can support their familes back in the Philippines, they cannot travel home, ever, until the day they decide to go home for good and get themselves deported. I spoke to one lady who was here 23 years and had never been home to see her kids, she was trying to organise the same for her university educated daughter to allow her support her own children in Philippines. So the criticism of the legal employment of migrant workers in Dubai is unjust, it should be a criticism of a country that encourages overseas workers as the only way to survive.

I think the difference is that in the case you state, undocumented workers stay out of choice. They can go home, they can leave the country, they can apply for visa’s and ILR eventually (usually).

the women I have dealt with- and it’s always women- cannot leave. Their employers hold their passports and dictate when they leave the country. They don’t have access to funds or resources, or legal assistance to leave their employers and go home.

I admit I do not know the consequences in Dubai and UAE if you leave your employer without permission and attempt to leave the country with no passport or documents. But some of these women I have met wait years until they are trusted enough to be taken out of the country with their employer to somewhere they can abscond and seek asylum.

that’s not “employment” or overstaying because they have a better life.

SnickerboaHoppfallera · 06/03/2026 09:22

mrbluebirdonmyshoulder · 06/03/2026 07:20

I'm also stunned at the amount of repressed hatred there is towards Dubai influlencers.

OP - I have to ask - did you compose that original post yourself?

Tangential, but why would a well written post not have been composed by an eloquent, and evidently emotionally invested, OP? Why insinuate that it might not be? People can still write, you know.

And OP, although I have not seen any of the Dubaicentric activity you refer to on my own socials, I agree with the sentiment that Dubai is morally abhorrent. The whole charade would not be possible without the shameful reliance on fossil fuels upon which the commercial centres of the region depend (and are built upon). I don't think it would be possible for anyone who genuinely cares about human dignity and wellbeing to participate in the lifestyle which lures the ethically corrupt.

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:27

Damdamdamdaaaam · 06/03/2026 09:19

You literally said above that you are srarching for that content. So of course content like that will be on your feed!
Honestly, you must be trolling.

And no I am not one of the influencers😂 I also have lived in experience there, still have many friends and some family there so I don't need to search insta for "news" like a sucker.

You’re not getting it. It’s really not that difficult.

I search for content about Dubai because I’m genuinely curious about the current situation there. Instead, what I get are influencers pushing a fantasy. I don’t follow or seek out influencers and their fantasy life, I’m simply looking for real updates on what’s actually happening in Dubai.

OP posts:
Naunet · 06/03/2026 09:28

ahemrepeat · 06/03/2026 09:02

I'm in Dubai. Call me all the names you want - I don't really care.

The government is doing a good job of keeping people safe. Part of that is keeping people calm. There are around 10m residents in the UAE. People are far more at risk from mass panic than the air attacks at the moment.

I think they're pushing it a bit into the unbelievable but it's been working so far with the majority of people. If that means people get annoyed at clueless influencers - fine by me.

Edited

But the problem is, we know you're not allowed to say anything bad about your government, so how can we trust anything you say about it?

Flamingojune · 06/03/2026 09:29

SnickerboaHoppfallera · 06/03/2026 09:22

Tangential, but why would a well written post not have been composed by an eloquent, and evidently emotionally invested, OP? Why insinuate that it might not be? People can still write, you know.

And OP, although I have not seen any of the Dubaicentric activity you refer to on my own socials, I agree with the sentiment that Dubai is morally abhorrent. The whole charade would not be possible without the shameful reliance on fossil fuels upon which the commercial centres of the region depend (and are built upon). I don't think it would be possible for anyone who genuinely cares about human dignity and wellbeing to participate in the lifestyle which lures the ethically corrupt.

Completely agree, although i'm sure some potty for dubai types will be along shortly to tell you to calm down

YorksMa · 06/03/2026 09:30

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:33

I can’t just switch my algorithm and PP’s are suggesting, when the whole reason I’m on there is to research Dubai and understand what’s happening, to see how things might escalate. It’s not just about social media; it’s mainstream media and other news sources too.

That ‘switch your algorithm and pretend it’s not there’ attitude is the same as turning a blind eye in real life. If you don’t see it, it’s as if it doesn’t exist.

This is said with kindness OP, but you can follow what's happening in the world and remain informed without doing constant deep dives on social media. I agree with others that you need to either close the apps or work on refocusing your algo because this sounds like it's affecting your wellbeing and mental health. I understand how easy it is for this to happen and how powerful it can be because the same thing happened to me some years ago, although on a different subject. Taking care of your mental health and regulating your news intake isn't being blind to the world or ignoring it - it's how most people interacted with world events until very recently.

Damdamdamdaaaam · 06/03/2026 09:30

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:27

You’re not getting it. It’s really not that difficult.

I search for content about Dubai because I’m genuinely curious about the current situation there. Instead, what I get are influencers pushing a fantasy. I don’t follow or seek out influencers and their fantasy life, I’m simply looking for real updates on what’s actually happening in Dubai.

I am getting it. You are not.
You are searching for Dubai content, influencers have Dubai content so algorithm will give you that. It's really that simple.

Searching for news on SM in itself is problematic

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:33

Jlom · 06/03/2026 09:20

Influencers are just marketing people selling you stuff. Their job is advertising. It is the equivalent to getting angry when your 'lived experience' of a washing powder doesn't wash quite as white as the advert claims.

You’re joking, right? Being mis-sold washing powder isn’t remotely comparable to being lured to Dubai.

OP posts:
justasking111 · 06/03/2026 09:33

I haven't seen influencers in the press, on the news or on twitter about the war out there so I'd stick with those.

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:35

Damdamdamdaaaam · 06/03/2026 09:30

I am getting it. You are not.
You are searching for Dubai content, influencers have Dubai content so algorithm will give you that. It's really that simple.

Searching for news on SM in itself is problematic

Why are you so offended on behalf of people whose job is literally to lie and manipulate others online for quick cash?

OP posts:
bittertwisted · 06/03/2026 09:39

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:33

You’re joking, right? Being mis-sold washing powder isn’t remotely comparable to being lured to Dubai.

How does one get ‘lured to Dubai’
do you just trot off with a jaunty hat and a cat to make your fortune Dick Whittington style?

RosePetals86 · 06/03/2026 09:39

Agree completely OP. I have had to laugh how many have said how safe it is there and while also hopping on the first available flight out 😂 ok buddy!

Damdamdamdaaaam · 06/03/2026 09:40

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:35

Why are you so offended on behalf of people whose job is literally to lie and manipulate others online for quick cash?

😂 I am not offended on their behalf. I am more baffled by you not understand that searching for dubai content will give you.... Dubai content....
They are walking ads. 🤷 Simple. No one with half brain takes them seriously

SkinnyLatteExtraHotPlease · 06/03/2026 09:40

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 06:51

I’m venting here, as a former expat sick of being pushed content from influencers who know nothing about the realities of living there under terms that don’t involve government cash to push a blindfolded, tone deaf narrative.

Dubai is the ultimate symbol of moral compromise, a glossy façade masking hypocrisy. Nowhere else do you see people who once mocked or feared Muslims flocking to Muslim lands to live comfortably off their wealth.

Certain professions thrive in their own sheltered bubbles, teachers, for example, rarely look beyond their privileged expat circles.

Parents who gush about loving their children casually employ underpaid nannies, often Filipina women who’ve left their own children behind. The usual defence? “She earns more here than back home.” Conveniently ignoring the exploitative system that brought her there. Hypocrisy in full view.

In a supposedly Muslim state, the same rules of faith vanish when profit or expat comfort is at stake. Alcohol flows freely, prostitution thrives, gambling exists, pork is sold, and dogs fill parks, all justified under the umbrella of “keeping expats happy.”

Many defend the government’s heavy control as if to prove their choice to stay is right. They need that illusion. Meanwhile, the state ensures expats feel “safe” because their satisfaction is profitable.

What influencers call “hate” toward Dubai isn’t jealousy. It’s frustration, frustration at how proudly expats flaunt a lifestyle while belittling their home countries, still benefiting from UK systems without paying a penny of tax. It’s tone-deafness wrapped in sunshine and skyline filters.

I know because I lived there. I arrived with good intentions to work hard, save, go home. But within a few years, I was buried in credit card debt, battling an eating disorder, and clinging to delusions just to survive mentally.

It’s easy to adopt the spin/ the narrative of safety, success, and superiority, because the system is designed to make you believe it.

People are tired of the influencer nonsense: clickbait, fake engagement, pretentious “Dubai life” hype. Every smug clip of a sunset or a skyline feels like rubbing salt in collective anxiety, especially while the UK faces uncertainty, fear, and political messes. The contrast feels cruel.

Dubai isn’t a real place, it’s a business model. A well-oiled corporation with immaculate branding and impeccable control over perception. It’s proof that humans will do almost anything for money.

They’ll mute moral conflict, ignore exploitation, and call it “success.”

Expats boast about how “safe” Dubai is compared to the UK, but that’s a narrow kind of safety, street-level safety, not emotional, financial, or existential safety. Is your job secure? Is your mental health stable? Are your rights protected? Safety for whom, the western professionals or the migrant workers living without basic freedoms?

In my view most expats won’t return home. Some can’t afford to. Debt, or the fear of losing status keep them trapped. Others left with problems they can’t face back in the UK. Many still defend Dubai fervently because admitting the truth would unravel years of self-justification.

It’s not far from a cult, everyone repeating the same comforting lines while ignoring what’s right in front of them.

I spent just over three years there. My profession wasn’t part of a protected bubble, so I met people from all walks of life. That distance gave me perspective. I changed, and yes, I too once repeated the same scripted defence to friends back home. It was easier to mask my unhappiness than face it.

Rant over.

Interesting to read your views, some of which I totally agree with but why did you begin with 'former expat' & not 'economic migrant'

popcornandpotatoes · 06/03/2026 09:41

I don't give two shiny shits about influencers in Dubai. It is not in my algorithm, I don't think about it or know much about it. Let them crack on, they've made their choice. I have more sympathy for the people who didn't ask to be born in the middle east becoming victims of another horrendous conflict.

PipMumsnet · 06/03/2026 09:43

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We understand that discussions like this often get heated but we'd like to remind you that Mumsnet is here to make parents' lives easier. While we encourage healthy and robust discussion, we hope that everyone can respect each other in their choices and express their views without resorting to personal attacks or troll hunting. We're sure you'd all agree that we all need all the support we can get.

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surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:43

bittertwisted · 06/03/2026 09:39

How does one get ‘lured to Dubai’
do you just trot off with a jaunty hat and a cat to make your fortune Dick Whittington style?

I’ll admit, your comment made me chuckle.

I’m sure I don’t have to explain that those “lured” are often expatriates seeking high-paying jobs, are enticed to move to Dubai with overly rosy promises of wealth, luxury, and easy living, but are then faced with harsh realities like sky-high costs, debt traps, isolation, and exploitative work conditions.

OP posts:
Abhannmor · 06/03/2026 09:46

For alphabetical reasons Ireland sits near Iran and Iraq at the UN. I once read a book by an Irish diplomat who was based there. He noticed that whatever their differences most Arabs and Iranians had one thing in common : they despise the Gulfies. The latter are regarded as front offices for oil companies and the west in general, rather than as real nations.

Many of the borders around the Gulf were drawn by a woman called Gertrude Bell actually, when the Ottoman empire was carved up iirc. Eg Kuwait. Like the OP I think I'll save my tears for the Filipina nurses and Indian labourers.

OldieButBaddie · 06/03/2026 09:46

CruCru · 06/03/2026 09:18

I was going to say something a bit like this. I have heard of influencers but I am yet to encounter one. If you get a load of these people on your Instagram feed then it is because you watch some of them so it feeds you more.

Just pay for ad free Instagram
I was about to delete mine but I thought I'd try it and it is a game changer

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 09:47

Damdamdamdaaaam · 06/03/2026 09:40

😂 I am not offended on their behalf. I am more baffled by you not understand that searching for dubai content will give you.... Dubai content....
They are walking ads. 🤷 Simple. No one with half brain takes them seriously

Edited

…is that not the point of my post? My frustrations with the Dubai fantasy content being relentlessly pushed by influencers.

OP posts:
TheClangyClunk · 06/03/2026 09:50

If you limit your social media searching to reputable journalists presumably eventually the influencer posts will drop off or at least be outnumbered? It doesn't seem that complicated.

Swipe left for the next trending thread