To be sick of misogynistic aggressive male chuggers?

[Bearsdolovetrees]

I work near a major London rail station and get harassed by male chuggers constantly. They don’t take no for an answer, block my path, and walk alongside me even when I’ve asked them not to.

Two examples:

Today I said “no thank you” to a Stop the Knife fundraiser. He followed me, kept asking if I was sure, and when I changed direction to move away he said “wow, what an attitude you have.”

A few months ago a Shelter fundraiser blocked my path and kept trying to fist bump me. After I said no several times, he called me unkind and ‘not a nice woman.’ I complained to the charity and they said they’d investigated and had a word with him, but ultimately, “found no evidence” which is obvious as it’s their word against mine. Am I supposed to film my walk to the station every day?!

This is daily now: young male chuggers using forced compliments about my hair/earrings/dress to try to get me to engage. I’m pretty sure they’re not genuinely into my 50-year-old style — it’s just another tactic. And, yet, they’re always offended when I don’t fawn a thank you and I get some nasty comment.

I’ve tried being pleasant, being rude. Complaining seems to go nowhere. It’s misogynistic and intimidating, and honestly not okay behaviour from men representing charities. What can I do?! What do others do?

I haven't experienced this but I'm enraged you all have. I ABSOLUTELY hate those arrogant, aggressive, manipulative 'compliments' from men. Not that I get them anymore. But soon enough my daughter will have to walk that turd lined pathway of life and I'm furious.

I don't give to charities that use these tactics. In fact I don't ever buy from a cold sale.

I don't know if I fully agree, I think a lot of them like their job and the buzz of getting people to sign up, the manipulation.

Never interact, always look through them.

I give to chosen charities, never to any who think it is a good idea to harass me when shopping/walking. I even cancelled a long standing direct debit to a charity who had a table set up, harassing people as they left the supermarket.

Most of these street charity aggressors are scams anyway, out to get a penny out of the easily intimidated who are often vulnerable themselves. It's disgusting behaviour which only continues because they are being rewarded.

Why care? Everyone hates them.

I don’t engage at all. Treat them like they are invisible. I keep my eyes fixed straight ahead and just walk through them. I don’t respond, don’t react and couldn’t give a shiny shit if they shout things at my back as I steam past.

I've always behaved as though they are simply not there. Blocking people's paths, though, is outrageous and would make it very difficult to ignore someone completely, which of course is the intention. If possible, I'd try to move around them still without communicating. It's equally hard to argue with silence.

As for saying 'this person is not nice', I'll happily wear it.

"me no speak english"...sorted

What these people do should be outlawed, it's a disgrace. There was a big thread going on on a local Facebook page some months back about this. Someone started a thread saying they were sick to death of the local foodstore having chuggers on the way out of the store. You literally cannot avoid them, you have to walk past them, and yes they do largely target women. Over 45 usually. OR men and women over 75. I don't know if they just assume that women, and people over 75 will be more compliant. Around 46 weeks out of any given year there are bloody sodding chuggers on the way out of the store!

About 200 comments came onto the thread, and the vast majority of people agreed that they are an abolute bloody menace. A small handful of people came on with the predictable trope 'I hope YOU never need the help of these charities.' (Must work for the charities themselves, as they got so butthurt!) They were royally ignored.

They are DREADFUL, absolutely bloody hideous, and I fucking loathe them. I actually snap at them and say NO and carry on walking. I don't owe them fuck-all, and I am not made of sodding money! I sometimes pretend I am on the phone, but often just ignore them. No-one does it for nothing, and they get paid between £80 and £100 for every mug person they sign up!

I have not one scrap of sympathy, empathy, compassion for these people, nor do I feel guilty or bad for ignoring them and shunning them. I am so unbelievably fucked off with them, and I am sick to DEATH of constantly encountering them everywhere I go! And yes, the male ones are worse, and do target women with their ludicrous 'flattery' and 'compliments.' 🙄

And don't even get me started on every other bloody checkout I go to begging me for a contribution to 'charity...' And even the CHARITY shops ask you to 'round up' now. I spent £8.75 in a charity shop some months back, and they asked me if I wanted to round up to £10.00. I said 'no.' Not 'no, sorry,' just 'NO.' The woman at the checkout said 'oh, I see. Well do you want to buy some raffle tickets then' and I said 'no.' THEN she said 'would you like to take part in our weekly lottery?' I then said 'my God do you people want blood? I am spending nearly nine pounds on something in your shop that you got for FREE off someone! No I don't want to do the lottery, or raffle, and I don't want to round up!' She was like

I paid for my item, and haven't been in since. In December, the shop closed for business. Indeed, quite a few of them are now. I'm not sorry about this, as they have become massive begging bowls, preying on the vulnerable, and people who are scared to say no ... They used to be good places to get some nice, cheap items, but now charity shops are mostly rip off merchants who sell overpriced second hand shite (sorry PRE-LOVED!) and even sell some NEW stuff, which is very unfair on other retailers, who aren't getting lots of stock for free, and staff working for free. I would go into a charity shop (or two) once a week up to about a year ago, now I can't be arsed with them. Haven't set foot in one in 4-5 months..

.

Around here there are a lot of idealistic, naive, kindly students. It’s them who stop to chat to the chuggers and I feel so sorry for them. They’re skint and they really think that they ought to be giving their money to these grifters? They know no better though. Those Romanian beggars blocking supermarket entrances who get picked up by a Mercedes people carrier at the end of every day make a fortune in freshers week.

They are truly awful. Surprised it's still allowed to be honest. They never behave like normal humans!

Just ignore them. I had male and female chuggers every day where I used to work, I just got smart to dodging them.

They are! We had a lovely young Mongolian woman at my church. She was always very polite and smiley. 😊 She was at university here and has now gone home.

Meanwhile, I remember some chugger twat jumping out of the dark at me one evening while I was walking home via the high street. Took me a while to understand what the fuck was going on. I was too startled to feel scared, but I can imagine for some people that would have been very upsetting. 😠

Hold your hand up to them, like the stop sign, and say (very confidently), "Don't even think about it!" Has worked every time for me but if it doesn't for you then you are well within your rights to then say, "F* off out of my face!". And if you get any attitude off them, push the corners of your mouth up into a smile with both of your middle fingers.

I am almost certain they don't and they would be lucky to get one sign up a day, standing there for 10 hours. They're probably on commission only so it's barely legal work.

You make them sound more sophisticated and manipulative than young people who may lack the qualifications or abilities to get a better job. Most people only do it for about two weeks then quit.

Wonder how they'd react if you suddenly act scared and shouting for help, that you're being harrassed and followed by a stranger, and are scared for your life/safety.

When asked I occasionally go with "Done", and I just get a thank you

Totally agree, I absolutely fucking hate them.

They operate outside where I work, so you get launched on just trying to go in or out.

They definitely target women, and act like they're on some potential hook up.

I'm getting a bit old now, and have a good rage face, so when they inevitably say 'hey, you look like a nice lady!' I just say 'I'm not' while maintaining my pace and not making eye contact.

But honestly, it's harassment. It shouldn't be OK to target women in this way on the streets anymore. Total bullshit.

About 20 years ago I was jogging through the town centre desperately trying to catch the last post, and got 'Don't you want to Save the Children!' screamed after me when I declined to give them my bank details in the middle of the street.

I've never given them a penny since because of it.

Omg yes! I was in central London for work a few weeks ago and thought I’d treat myself to a mooch round Covent Garden in the evening. In about five mins got collared by three different chuggers who all start with some compliment. One said ‘wow, your skin is glowing, what is your secret?’ My skin is not glowing, I’m knackered. By the third I was fed up of being nice and screeched ‘leave me alone!’. After that I went back to my hotel as had had enough.

Why do they think I would give my bank details to a stranger to on the street? I hate the way they almost gleefully jump in to your space and expect you to stop. I did ask one particularly persistent one if he would like to give me his bank details first. I have stopped all the big charity donations and now give to individuals or small charities where I think my money will make a difference rather than paying for these chuggers on the street.

I think learning an offensive phrase in some little known language is probably the way to go. They won't know what you're saying so won't know how to react. If they do happen to understand what you've said, you've told them to fk off or whatever so it's a win win either way.

I shocked a chugger one day by telling him that I'd prefer it if the wild animals he was collecting for actually died because I hated them. I'm actually a huge animal lover, but it did shut him up. Tell the knife people you love weapons and belong to a fight club 😂

Street fundraisers have to behave in a way that suitably represents the charity and cannot misrepresented, mislead or be aggressive. If they are you can raise a formal complaint with the charity followed by a complaint to the Fundraising Regulator for charities in England, Wales and NI. For Scottish charities it would be charity then the Scottish Fundraising Adjudication Panel and then if still not happy with the outcome raise a complaint with The Office of the Scottish Charity Regulator.
I know most people don't want the hassle of raising formal complaints but these chuggers pull down the whole charitable sector and charities that employ these tactics should be held accountable.

Different approaches. Ignore and blank completely. ‘Fuck off/Get out of my fucking way’. Rude gesture without looking backwards. My glare normally has them quaking in their boots. I have also complained to my local council and TFL about chuggers on the street/TFL property.

I told one recently ‘I’m not 18 yet’, given that I am pushing 40 it really seemed to confuse him and he backed off. How can you argue with that?