AIBU to feel insulted.

[Leftoutthewill]

Mum died April 25, previous will stated that any estate was to be split between me and my sister. We should have been in line for a share of a 285,00.00 estate. My sister and her husband have taken responsibility for everything for my mum for the last 17 years, shopping, appointments caring for dad as he was dying, taking her on holiday, having her at Christmas, sitting with her at hospital for emergencies, helping her sort out bills, things going wrong with the house responding to her care alarm all thr while living 20 miles away. In the end she kept falling they took her to live with them and cared for her 24hours a day, eventually this became too much and she spent the last couple of months in a care home.
We just went every now and then and until recently we'd not seen her in four years.
My sister is executor of the will and chose to go through a solicitor. It turns out the six month probate finished on 12th February and I've recently had a letter to say that I'm due to receive some money but not detailing how much. I never received a copy of the will so have contacted the solicitor and have discovered that my sister has been left the majority of the estate and I'm left wih £10,000. She gets around £260,000
Apparently she changed her will about 12 months before she died, she has capacity according to a capacity assessment and its all legal and above board. Apparently there is very little I can do.
I feel like the solicitor should have written to me to explain about the 6 months probate but apparently the will was public information and was downloadable months ago. Apparently he onus is on me to find will and pay to download it then take action. I should surely receive more of a share?

Are you taking the piss? You obviously didn’t give a shit about your mum, just her money. Consider yourself lucky to get £10k. I’d have left you nowt.

You didnt see her for 4 years, how on earth is that an ok relationship?! You are an entitled deluded piece of work.
My extended family live 350 miles away and I go and see them at least 3 times a year. This is aunts, uncles, cousins and great aunts. I won't receive any inheritance and would never expect to but I love them and want to see them so I make the effort.
You couldn't get off your arse to go 50miles, but managed to get to the funeral and no moaning about not getting more money christ you're vile human.

If you thought caring for your mother was something to show off about, you know what you could have done.

All your posts are relentlessly horrible. Are you thinking about it even slightly, given the response you're getting?

This!

And so did you. You chose not to see your mum and not have a relationship. Why do you feel entitled to more when you didnt even go and see her. As you said you made your bed now you have to lie in it.

I thought so, but reverses aren't usually this consistent (they usually fold once rumbled) and now she sounds drunk.

Exactly!

I think @Leftoutthewill should understand that £10k is a good deal for someone who didn't see the deceased for years.

My sister contested our mother's will. They had been no contact for 25 years, mainly my sister's choice in that she expected my mother to grovel. She tried to demand more than 60%. My mother had left her £20,000 in the hope that would satisfy her. Ha bloody ha. It went to mediation in the end as the strain of it all was too much. I ended up with about 85%. I will never forgive her for the lies she told, the hurt she caused and the damage she did. Interestingly she did not contest my father's will 20 years earlier.
You sound like my sister, OP. I strongly suggest you go and find a large cactus, sit on it,and then swivel. Repeatedly.

You are very lucky to get 10k to be honest - think I’d feel bad enough to give it to my unselfish and devoted sister.

This. Where were you when your mother needed care etc? It’s okay for you to not be involved, you have a right to that as your own person and choice fair enough, but you can’t have have your cake and eat it 🤷‍♀️

I think people are reading the thread wrong. It seems to me OP was the scapegoat child and had no traction in being an equal player in organising care. Now golden child - overbrimming with virtue - has the inheritance. I get it OP.

How did you manage the massive reach for that?!

Nah. OP refused to help when asked. You ever heard the tale of the little red hen. You reap what you sow.

You openly state that your sister and her husband cared for your mother (and your father) for over 17 YEARS prior to her death. You also state that you hadn't even gone to see your mother in the care home in over 4 YEARS. Why on earth are you so baffled that your mother changed her will to benefit the people that actually CARED for her when she needed help? I feel like you're extremely LUCKY to be getting even 10K as you didn't really deserve anything.

You are entitled to the inheritance you mum deems she wants to give you. Your DM could have left it to a cat shelter if she wanted.

She saw what your sister did for her, and in sound mind made a choice. Your sister might not have even known until after.

Sorry for your sisters loss. RiP

until recently we'd not seen her in four years.

id think that was a bit more than a blow, you lived 50 miles away and left it 4 years without a visit...

It was easy for you to say fuck it, ill sit back and not help with the care for 17 years

now though its you somehow that is insulted

wow I think I’ve read it all! How much time and money do you think your sister spent looking after your parents? I see that she’s just been partially reimbursed for it and you should be happy you got anything.

My reply was a reference to the previous reply. Check up the reply chain paying particular reference to the phrase “of her own accord”.

You deserved nothing let alone £10k!

if your parents had had to pay for the care your sister and her family provided your share of the estate would have been about 10p. So if you have any dignity don’t start an argument, take the £10000 and be grateful your mother was a more forgiving person than most would have been under the circumstances. BTW the only insult in this situation is the callous attitude you showed towards your parents by not even visiting

I think this is a reverse btw , don’t understand why but there you go.

But if she was struggling and asked you for help, why didn't you do anything?

Did you quote it?

Seems like you got exactly what you deserved and so did your sister who did all the work. Be grateful you got anything at all.

So you admit you barely did anything for your Mum, she was difficult in your words and you though "fuck her. You've made your bed" BUT you still expect a decent share of her estate?!
What planet do you live on? Because I think £10,000 was generous for someone who clearly didn't give a shit about her own Mother. Difficult or not - you couldn't be bothered, let your sister do it all for 17years yet wanted a generous payout?!
Get over yourself. You're being ridiculous.