To think the test must be wrong

[chillidoritto]

I am in a state of hysteria here. I am in the peri and on HRT. We haven’t been particularly careful because I didn’t think I needed to be.

Have been feeling tired, off colour and have had ridiculously sore boobs. Have just had a positive test.

Can the HRT hormones somehow affect the outcome of the test?! This is the hope I am clinging on to.

Anyone?

I was always warned when going to the doctor about contraception in my 40s.

The OP really needs people like you and @Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain. What a helpful response. Most women would probably assume that their fertility is pretty low at the age of 49. But unfortunately OP is now in this position. But it’s very nice and helpful of you to try and make out that she’s stupid.

My oldest DS, his friend at achool was a menopause baby. Parents had grandkids. Both mum and dad were in their 50s!
OP do what's best for you xx

How is that question helpful to the OP at this point?

Mumsnet is such a repellent place sometimes

So what?

It must be such a shock. Try not to panic because you don’t need to have another baby, you have options

These things happen, you won’t be the first, and you won’t be the last. I am 49 too and just can’t imagine. Speak to your GP and they can make arrangements if you choose to terminate (it’s what i’d do personally). My youngest is almost 18.

I’m so sorry but your hormones can have a “last hurrah” right at the end, making you extremely fertile for a brief window.

This doesn’t mean you have to have a baby, or that you are going to have a baby - rates of miscarriage are extremely high in this age group. But it would be a good idea to speak to someone about your options.

I genuinely didn't think people could have babies at 49 and 50. I would think statistically the chances of miscarriage are extremely high, otherwise surely it would be common enough. 47 is the oldest I heard if. Sorry OP you are going through this. It's a cautionary tale

But it’s very nice and helpful of you to try and make out that she’s stupid.

Wondering why doesn't mean that I think she's stupid.

Perhaps she wasn't properly advised.

Idk.

It’s extremely common, but many pregnancies at this age end in early miscarriage and as periods tend to be so irregular at this point of menopause, many women don’t realise.

I think extremely common is over exaggerating a bit. It can happen yes. But it really isn’t extremely common.

@diddlbut you don’t need to wonder why? OP is clearly distressed, and that’s all you could muster up. It’s like the posters who ask why someone had more children with a rubbish partner, it’s pointless and is usually a thinly disguised dig at the person.

Biologically speaking, we know that it’s common due to the way that hormones and egg release behave during the menopause. It is, however, very seldom reported as most women aren’t even aware it is happening.

Op, I apologise for my question & hope that I haven't upset you.

I had the opposite pregnant as a teenager... gp was terrible. I would go straight to BPAS !

To realise it could still be a possibility at 49, obviously. This question is at best ignorant and at worst heartless and dickish, so why bother?

@chillidoritto I have heard of hormonal conditions like PCOS causing false positives so please try not to panic and get to the GP to make sure, because it might not be what you think

I’m 48 and would be freaking OUT if I discovered I was pregnant, so I can imagine your panic, OP.

First things first, get to the doctor and find out how pregnant you are. You don’t have to proceed with this pregnancy. And early termination is fairly straightforward.

I too wouldn't bother with the GP. They'll do a urine pregnancy test and likely refer you to EPU for a scan/bloods if you aren't sure of dates. BPAS and other abortion services might offer a scan. You are under no obligation to to continue down that route if you decide not to though. They generally have counselling services if you wanted to discuss pros/cons etc. Not only is the risk of MC and genetic issues higher as we age, but also the chance of having twins- so all considerations. OP- do you have a partner or someone to talk with in real life? x

OP, please don't beat yourself up about this. Concentrate on what you want to do. If you decide not to proceed then you can access support very quickly.

Oh goodness, what a situation. Sending

I could quite easily be in this position but thankfully my DH had the snip. After child number 4 was born I informed him I would not be sleeping with him again unless he had it done.

Perhaps a similar conversation with your DH is required going forwards whatever you decide to do OP.