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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Let me spell this out very clearly for the hard of thinking

360 replies

KillTheTurkey · 13/02/2026 16:34

Men commit 99% of all rapes and sexual assaults.

Men (and young men) commit 95-98% of school shootings.

Men commit 90% of all violent crime in the UK.

These are not female crimes, and should never, ever be reported - or recorded - as such. It can safely be assumed in any of the above circumstances that a male person was the perpetrator.

OP posts:
Motheroftheb · 13/02/2026 18:00

Dollymylove · 13/02/2026 17:54

Im not quite getting the point of this post. Nobody is disputing that men commit the majority of violent crimes. We dont need lecturing by Nanny.
Women can and do commit violent crimes but whenever someone points that out, there comes a barrage of "yes but....."
It sometimes seems that some people wish to minimise the acts of violence by women, just to prove their point 😡

Why don’t you get the point? It’s pretty straightforward that when men commit crimes, they shouldn’t be reported as women committing them?

dadtoateen · 13/02/2026 18:00

KillTheTurkey · 13/02/2026 16:42

Yes they do, honestly please stop with the gaslighting. Men rape, men shoot, men commit violent crime.

If we are doing this….

women rape, women shoot, women commit violent crime…..

as much as men? Nope but they do 👍

Megifer · 13/02/2026 18:00

You can't reason with very stupid people OP.

Jamesblonde2 · 13/02/2026 18:01

Absofuckinglutely OP.

Plasticdreams · 13/02/2026 18:01

Pineneedlesincarpet · 13/02/2026 17:47

A recent poll suggest that 30% of men and 22% of women intend to vote Reform.

Are you saying that 30% of men and 22% of women don't "understand statistics, facts and evidence"? Where is your evidence for that statistic?

I’d be interested to hear more about this ‘poll’, Where was it taken and how many people took part. If reform released it as part of their campaign, I doubt very much it’s accurate.
Let’s say it is accurate then YES, I would say that 33% or men and 22% of women do not understand facts, statistics and evidence - because if you did, you would not vote for reform, obviously.
Look at the US and the absolute mong that is in power there. How did he get voted in? By men and women who are clearly very easily manipulated and have no interest in evidence, facts or statistics!

latetothefisting · 13/02/2026 18:02

RichardOnslowRoper · 13/02/2026 16:49

Yes, but my husband's lovely!
Also, a nice man fixed my car when it broke down.
Ooh and women are so bitchy! I hate my women co-workers.

Have I got all the usual responses?

you missed out "women can commit crimes too, you know, how about [insert example of female criminal who is notorious precisely because it is so very very unusual for a woman to be convicted of that type of crime, thus actually proving the point rather than disproving it]."

Also a subsection of the not-my-Nige category "there's just a few very bad apples out there ruining it for the rest of them" (completely ignoring all mathematical probability -given the extremely high percentage of women who have experienced, say, rape and SA, if only 1% or less of men were perpetrators they would have to be constantly attacking multiple women every single day for the stats to match up, which would be even harder given so many of them are already incarcerated!)

CurlewKate · 13/02/2026 18:03

KillTheTurkey · 13/02/2026 16:34

Men commit 99% of all rapes and sexual assaults.

Men (and young men) commit 95-98% of school shootings.

Men commit 90% of all violent crime in the UK.

These are not female crimes, and should never, ever be reported - or recorded - as such. It can safely be assumed in any of the above circumstances that a male person was the perpetrator.

It is impossible to spell this out clearly enough for those that choose not to understand.

YouHaveAnArse · 13/02/2026 18:04

Is this an anti-men thread or an anti-trans thread? Just so we're all clear.

I want to know whether we're using this info as a justification to not allow men to work in caring professions or not to allow trans women to pee in the same toilets this time round. For clarity, you understand. Cheers.

RichardOnslowRoper · 13/02/2026 18:05

YouHaveAnArse · 13/02/2026 18:04

Is this an anti-men thread or an anti-trans thread? Just so we're all clear.

I want to know whether we're using this info as a justification to not allow men to work in caring professions or not to allow trans women to pee in the same toilets this time round. For clarity, you understand. Cheers.

I am all for both of your suggestions.
To be clear.
Transwomen are men.

IkeaJesusChrist · 13/02/2026 18:05

KillTheTurkey · 13/02/2026 17:57

AIBU is an interesting place! The discussion has been robust, as expected. A couple of clarifications:

  1. I posted this in response to this week’s school shooting, where the perpetrator was initially presumed female by reports. My immediate presumption was that it would be a man or young man.
  2. Why was it reported this way, when we know that such crimes are not committed by women and girls?
  3. Might we now see a backlash against crimes committed by men being wrongly attributed to women?

So biological women have never committed a violent crime or a school shooting?

It was reported that way probably because at the time the authorities didn't care what gender the suspect was, they just needed to get a rough description out so that the local residents were aware.

TheMorgenmuffel · 13/02/2026 18:05

YouHaveAnArse · 13/02/2026 18:04

Is this an anti-men thread or an anti-trans thread? Just so we're all clear.

I want to know whether we're using this info as a justification to not allow men to work in caring professions or not to allow trans women to pee in the same toilets this time round. For clarity, you understand. Cheers.

Neither.
Its a "don't record male crimes as female crimes" thread.

Americano75 · 13/02/2026 18:05

ThejoyofNC · 13/02/2026 16:44

Maybe we should fill the women's prisons with men then? Seeing as they're just sat there empty.

Thing is, there are way more male prisons than there are female prisons. Demand and that.

persephonia · 13/02/2026 18:06

ThejoyofNC · 13/02/2026 16:44

Maybe we should fill the women's prisons with men then? Seeing as they're just sat there empty.

There are less women's prisons than men's because of the difference in offending rates. This causes issues with women being further away from family/children for visiting etc than men.

crazeekat · 13/02/2026 18:07

KillTheTurkey · 13/02/2026 16:45

Women don’t commit violent crime, on the whole. Women are in prison for lesser crimes.

I’ve clearly failed to explain this in simple enough terms. Still.

Was with you till this. Women really do commit violent crime. U just need to google. Yes definitely not to the same degree as men but they are still violent. They still murder.

AccidentallyWesAnderson · 13/02/2026 18:07

dadtoateen · 13/02/2026 18:00

If we are doing this….

women rape, women shoot, women commit violent crime…..

as much as men? Nope but they do 👍

No women can’t rape. The definition of rape is with a penis. Women can be charged with rape if they aid a penis haver (male).

Cheese55 · 13/02/2026 18:08

dadtoateen · 13/02/2026 18:00

If we are doing this….

women rape, women shoot, women commit violent crime…..

as much as men? Nope but they do 👍

But no way near on the same scale. No way near!!!

IkeaJesusChrist · 13/02/2026 18:09

Cheese55 · 13/02/2026 18:08

But no way near on the same scale. No way near!!!

That doesn't mean that they don't though does it?

Enterthewolves · 13/02/2026 18:09

ThejoyofNC · 13/02/2026 16:44

Maybe we should fill the women's prisons with men then? Seeing as they're just sat there empty.

69% of women are in prison for a non-violent offence, women are more likely than men to receive custodial sentences for nonviolent crimes than men, with longer sentences. Women only account for approximately 5% of the prison population.

DeftWasp · 13/02/2026 18:09

Cheese55 · 13/02/2026 17:50

Because men who rape women are now calling themselves women and thus recorded as a crime by a female.
The recent school shooter was described as a woman initially thus recorded as a crime by a female.
The point she is making is that these are not women as it is mostly men who commit these crimes.

That is sadly not a new phenomenon, there was the high profile case of the male rapist in Scotland who suddenly had a sex change and ended up in a women's prison.

Common sense seems to be lacking in that respect in my mind - men should be in mens prisons, regardless of self identification - putting a man in a female prison, particularly one with a conviction of violent crimes towards women is putting the female prisoners at risk.

Same as we men should not be in the women's loos regardless of how some identify - but it seems a very simple thing is very difficult to get sorted!

KillTheTurkey · 13/02/2026 18:09

YouHaveAnArse · 13/02/2026 18:04

Is this an anti-men thread or an anti-trans thread? Just so we're all clear.

I want to know whether we're using this info as a justification to not allow men to work in caring professions or not to allow trans women to pee in the same toilets this time round. For clarity, you understand. Cheers.

What?! Neither anti-men nor anti-trans.

Anti-violent men, though.

OP posts:
Pineneedlesincarpet · 13/02/2026 18:09

Plasticdreams · 13/02/2026 18:01

I’d be interested to hear more about this ‘poll’, Where was it taken and how many people took part. If reform released it as part of their campaign, I doubt very much it’s accurate.
Let’s say it is accurate then YES, I would say that 33% or men and 22% of women do not understand facts, statistics and evidence - because if you did, you would not vote for reform, obviously.
Look at the US and the absolute mong that is in power there. How did he get voted in? By men and women who are clearly very easily manipulated and have no interest in evidence, facts or statistics!

Its a yougov and statista poll (which I have not heard of so cannot vouch for accuracy).

Theres nothing "obvious" about a vote for Reform requiring that you don't understand facts, statistics or evidence. That's just your assumption and you know what they say happens to people who assume....

What facts statistics and evidence do you assume that you are required to have an inability to understand, as a Reform voter?

Megifer · 13/02/2026 18:09

YouHaveAnArse · 13/02/2026 18:04

Is this an anti-men thread or an anti-trans thread? Just so we're all clear.

I want to know whether we're using this info as a justification to not allow men to work in caring professions or not to allow trans women to pee in the same toilets this time round. For clarity, you understand. Cheers.

Its a fuck off with the simpering "women are violent too" when if you actually put all the violent men and women in the world together in a mixed group you'd be hard pushed to actually single out a woman thread.

MikeRafone · 13/02/2026 18:10

crazeekat · 13/02/2026 18:07

Was with you till this. Women really do commit violent crime. U just need to google. Yes definitely not to the same degree as men but they are still violent. They still murder.

woman commit 10% of violent crimes, whilst woman can be and do commit these crimes - its nowhere near at the rate of men. 30% of woman are in prison for violent crimes

Blushingm · 13/02/2026 18:10

KillTheTurkey · 13/02/2026 16:42

Yes they do, honestly please stop with the gaslighting. Men rape, men shoot, men commit violent crime.

Myra Hindley, Lucy Letby, Beverly Allier, Bonny & Clyde (a couple), Joanna Denny

TheMorgenmuffel · 13/02/2026 18:11

Blushingm · 13/02/2026 18:10

Myra Hindley, Lucy Letby, Beverly Allier, Bonny & Clyde (a couple), Joanna Denny

Now name all the men.