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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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14
Ereshkigalangcleg · 12/02/2026 08:09

Shedmistress · 12/02/2026 07:53

Yeah you did when you used the words 'equally reprehensible'.

Indeed.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 12/02/2026 08:09

SpaceRaccoon · 12/02/2026 08:08

I think the writer made the mistake because in their head, trans=victim, always.

I agree.

borntobequiet · 12/02/2026 08:11

SpaceRaccoon · 12/02/2026 08:08

I think the writer made the mistake because in their head, trans=victim, always.

Agreed. The writer, like the rest of society, has been groomed or duped into believing this.

ChickenCooper · 12/02/2026 08:19

@ThatCyanCat show me where I said I 'think it's hateful to have a word for female people that doesn't include male people and vice versa"? That didn't happen.

Shedmistress · 12/02/2026 08:38

ChickenCooper · 12/02/2026 08:19

@ThatCyanCat show me where I said I 'think it's hateful to have a word for female people that doesn't include male people and vice versa"? That didn't happen.

Dude this thread is not all about you.

You clearly have come to this without knowing anything about Canada, about what has been going on for the last decade in terms of 'trans' and are up in arms that anyone should want actual facts to be out in public.

There is over a decade's worth of info on the board linked below for you. What we are seeing now is the reality of lying to kids and when ideology meets reality, things often do no go well.

It isn't about 'hatred', if it was then we'd all go home and think 'let them fuck their lives up with puberty blockers and hormones, what do we care'. That is the opposite to what is going on.

Sex & gender discussions - women's rights | Mumsnet

Sex & gender discussions - women's rights | Mumsnet

This is a space for civil and mutually respectful conversation for discussions about sex and gender identity.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 08:40

Shedmistress · 12/02/2026 07:50

You could just post about the tragedy and the victims yourself, rather than complain about what everyone else is posting about.

I was hoping to find out more given that the thread is in AIBU, not FWR, and is called "at least 7 dead after school shooting in BC". I thought it might be a news and information focused thread....

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2026 08:40

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

That's quite a claim, when you look at the massive numbers of murders carried out by non-trans people.

Shedmistress · 12/02/2026 08:40

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 08:40

I was hoping to find out more given that the thread is in AIBU, not FWR, and is called "at least 7 dead after school shooting in BC". I thought it might be a news and information focused thread....

Well, go get the news and information you find and post it here.

borntobequiet · 12/02/2026 08:43

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2026 08:40

That's quite a claim, when you look at the massive numbers of murders carried out by non-trans people.

I think you mean “people who do not claim to be trans”.

Most of us are not “non-trans”, in the same way that women are not “non-men”.

Helleofabore · 12/02/2026 08:45

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 08:40

I was hoping to find out more given that the thread is in AIBU, not FWR, and is called "at least 7 dead after school shooting in BC". I thought it might be a news and information focused thread....

The incident has been very widely reported and analysed by media around the world. Why would you attempt to control threads discussing different aspects of the incident and the reporting to suit yourself? You have the internet at your fingertips if you cannot find commentary that you want to engage in. Yet you took to time to post your complaint here.

ThatCyanCat · 12/02/2026 08:46

ChickenCooper · 12/02/2026 08:19

@ThatCyanCat show me where I said I 'think it's hateful to have a word for female people that doesn't include male people and vice versa"? That didn't happen.

I've already quoted your absolutely disgusting post in which you made the equivalence, which doesn't get less disgusting because you're now trying to change the context. Nothing that has been said in this thread is equivalent to mass murder.

I am done with your time wasting and disingenuousness and frankly revolting false equivalences. Your tactics are not new.

CraftandGlamour · 12/02/2026 08:46

ChickenCooper · 12/02/2026 07:46

@ThatCyanCat you are incorrect in this post. I did not at any point say that 'women using the word "man" for a male person as equivalent to a massive shooting.'

I was calling out the trans hate on this thread in response to posters stating that trans people are mentally unstable and using words like cosplayers, nuthouse, madness, altar of stupidity, insane etc.

Do you descirbe all disagreement with your personally held views as hate? That doesn't seem particularly healthy or wise.

ThatCyanCat · 12/02/2026 08:47

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 08:40

I was hoping to find out more given that the thread is in AIBU, not FWR, and is called "at least 7 dead after school shooting in BC". I thought it might be a news and information focused thread....

I thought it might be a news and information focused thread....

It is. We are discussing why so many news outlets are spreading such overt disinformation.

nolongersurprised · 12/02/2026 09:01

W0rnout · 12/02/2026 07:21

One wonders if some posters ever stop to consider that the bile, vitriol , hate speech and lack of understanding that the transgender community face on threads such as this escalate MH difficulties and tragedy.

So - affirm me or I’ll kill you all?

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 09:02

Helleofabore · 12/02/2026 08:45

The incident has been very widely reported and analysed by media around the world. Why would you attempt to control threads discussing different aspects of the incident and the reporting to suit yourself? You have the internet at your fingertips if you cannot find commentary that you want to engage in. Yet you took to time to post your complaint here.

Darvo much?

One post is an attempt to control 15 pages?
Your gang pile on every such post and control the narrative of every thread where a trans person is involved.

I find the useful summary of reporting on Mumsnet with linked articles, share tokens etc a useful way of getting the news quickly and enjoyably. But not on this thread.

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2026 09:03

There are around 500 murders in the UK alone every year, the vast majority carried out by non-trans people. Yet this event needs two long threads on MN, both of which fail to focus on the tragedy of the deaths but go on and on about the fact that the killer was trans.

There are some really strange values around here.

Helleofabore · 12/02/2026 09:04

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 09:02

Darvo much?

One post is an attempt to control 15 pages?
Your gang pile on every such post and control the narrative of every thread where a trans person is involved.

I find the useful summary of reporting on Mumsnet with linked articles, share tokens etc a useful way of getting the news quickly and enjoyably. But not on this thread.

Edited

Darvo? Is that projection Jimmy5bellies?

This post actually clarifies that your intention was to shame others for discussing issues in a way you disagree with. Thanks for that.

Helleofabore · 12/02/2026 09:08

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2026 09:03

There are around 500 murders in the UK alone every year, the vast majority carried out by non-trans people. Yet this event needs two long threads on MN, both of which fail to focus on the tragedy of the deaths but go on and on about the fact that the killer was trans.

There are some really strange values around here.

When the public is being told that a female person has committed a crime that a male person has committed, yes, people talk about how they have been told misinformation.

People can still discuss this as being an issue while still feeling horrified that it has happened. Do you believe that at this time all that anyone should be doing is publicly performing their horror? Or is there room for all reactions?

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 09:08

Helleofabore · 12/02/2026 09:04

Darvo? Is that projection Jimmy5bellies?

This post actually clarifies that your intention was to shame others for discussing issues in a way you disagree with. Thanks for that.

You aren't discussing issues are you?
You are reiterating the same talking points as on every such thread.

I have sympathy with the need for accurate reporting and the "not our crimes" angle. However I also wanted to find out about the victims, the circumstances, the possible motivation, the community as a human tragedy has taken place.

Helleofabore · 12/02/2026 09:10

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 09:08

You aren't discussing issues are you?
You are reiterating the same talking points as on every such thread.

I have sympathy with the need for accurate reporting and the "not our crimes" angle. However I also wanted to find out about the victims, the circumstances, the possible motivation, the community as a human tragedy has taken place.

Jimmy... the internet is full of the information you seek.

If this thread is not giving you the information you seek, perhaps you should either find it and post it yourself here as has been suggested.

Many links have already been provided on these very threads you are disparaging as being not what you want.

CapacityBrown · 12/02/2026 09:12

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2026 09:03

There are around 500 murders in the UK alone every year, the vast majority carried out by non-trans people. Yet this event needs two long threads on MN, both of which fail to focus on the tragedy of the deaths but go on and on about the fact that the killer was trans.

There are some really strange values around here.

And what are the figures like proportionally wise?

We should look at the causes of these crimes, but as soon as a trans person is involved, let's forget about it and focus on everything else?

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 09:14

I have gone elsewhere and have now found that 3 12 year old girls and 3 11 and 12 years old boys died.

Helleofabore · 12/02/2026 09:15

Jimmy5bellies · 12/02/2026 09:14

I have gone elsewhere and have now found that 3 12 year old girls and 3 11 and 12 years old boys died.

Edited

Yes... it was on the media linked in the threads that you have been keen to claim is not focused on what you want them to focus on.

Indeed, our very own bbc has been reporting it.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/ce8w95knp55o

SpaceRaccoon · 12/02/2026 09:18

This is why this thread is needed - one hour ago from the Mirror, and you'd never guess it was a man that did it.

Not our crime.

At least seven dead after school shooting in British Columbia
CarefullyCuratedFurniture · 12/02/2026 09:22

That town is a tiny, tiny place. Everyone knew who the shooter was, they'd known him for years. The police /media description is a red herring.

He didn't own guns illegally- he lived in a rural community where hunting was normal. Probably most kids in that school can shoot and have access to guns.

Swipe left for the next trending thread