To be surprised at someone being pregnant at 44

[Onempretime7788]

I would have thought post 35 was rare

I’ve known more women have them in their 40s than in their teens.

I was saying more mid to late 30,s
I agree 40+ things can become a lot harder

I agree that I wouldn’t think it was odd if a woman had a child age 35-37. 39+ is riskier but it’s up to women to take that risk.

Wasn’t that rare considering lack of contraception. My gran was 40 when she had my mum… because mum was her 6th kid!

I’ve seen you commenting on all the older mum bashing threads. It’s not “great grandparent age” where I live and in my social circle at all. It’s average. And where I live it wasn’t ever unusual for women in their late 30s and 40s to have babies either because there was no contraception years ago. Of course risks are higher above a certain age but It is still biologically “normal” and happens naturally. My own mother had me at 39 no issues. Maybe you need to get out a bit more, perhaps experience meeting different people outside of your own neighbourhood and limited social experience?

I mean before then their parents are usually still working full time so can’t help anyway. Support isn’t about age but about circumstances.

Wouldn’t matter if my parents were 50 or 90. They live 400 miles away 😂

Luck had nothing to do with it. Lack of empathy for who? I think you’ve misinterpreted my post. Karma 🤣 I’m delighted I’ll have teenagers in my 60s because the alternative would be not having children of any age in my 60s.

@Toddlergirlymy in laws were in their 70s when DH and I were still in our 20s. So hardly great grandparent age for all!

I had the oldest mum in the class at school in the mid 00s (she had me at 35).

I had my eldest a few weeks after I turned 24 and would say I’m one of the youngest school mothers but look older. Many are late thirties/early forties.

Personally I wouldn’t want to have a child at 44. One of my friends mums was a grandma and had a baby at 48.

I had my DS at 37 and I was fairly fit. I cannot imagine having one at 44. I feel tired just thinking about it. Let alone 48 like a previous poster mentions 😂

Absolutely agree with you and @Strawberrryfields. I had no idea about these things and was shocked when I struggled, despite being (I thought) the ‘right sort of age’ for it. Only then did I find out about the struggles the other women in my family had had. Also, remembering my gran (in her 50s when I was little) and seeing my mum, who is her 70s at the same stage of grandparenthood, and the difference is massive. She absolutely wants to do everything she can to help, but is limited by being so much older and in poor health. It’s made me realise that if my daughter waited till her late 30s to start a family, I’d be ancient, and probably wouldn’t live to see my grandchildren at secondary school, never mind grown up.

No i dont think 70 is great grandparents age either ( well it can be but more 80+ ime)
But its not very common to have children in their 20,s when you are in your 70,s either.

I had my first at 37! Again IVF and then had 2 more naturally! In my antenatal class I by far was not the oldest. I know someone who tried for her 2nd baby at 45 and got pg straight away!

lol neither was at 29! Still needed intervention to have our son.

not Saying you need to try now if that’s not in your timeline but I get the other posters view but it nots always simple

I guess that will become more common? Having a baby at, say, 42, they will still be in their 20s when one is 71! God I feel old now… 😂

Agree with others, start trying ASAP if you are certain you want children and will be upset if you can't conceive. Of course there are many women who have children in their late 30s and even into their 40s, but many more are desperately disappointed (different if, for you, having a child is a nice bonus and you could live happily without). Not saying this to be nasty, but really, every month counts in your late 30s...

I'd say it's not unheard of but is very unusual. Each to their own but can you imagine heading for 60 with a 13/14 year old! Don't think a teenager would like a mother of that age either

A school friends mother had her at 45. We all thought her granny looked after her because her niece's and nephew were older than her.
To add to the mix, her mum was a widow, her husband killed shortly after her birth in a train accident.

They had a great relationship although not quite so with her grown up siblings.

Yeah not anymore.
35 was my personal cut off but it's surprising how many people were announcing over 40. Most recent someone I know at 47 has just announced (IVF) like 😲😩😬😳

SO not for me. But it seems so much more common.
No one thinks of the kids and the future these days just selfishly what they want themselves.

The mean age for becoming a mother in the uk is 31 years old in 2024. So there will be some over 44 year olds giving birth but they are outliers

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/livebirths/bulletins/birthsummarytablesenglandandwales/2024refreshedpopulations#age-specific-fertility-rates

I had my youngest when I was 29. On my notes I was classed as an ‘elderly’ multigravida 🤣

I had my first 3 in my 20s and my 4th at 44 😊 all natural.

Mind you - it took 2 years of trying hard for DD4, and about 2 minutes of trying hard for my older ones ....

For the record -
i'm not 'knackered'. She's 11 now and i def wouldn't want to be doing it again now obviously, i have my limits! but i've been fine. My periods have only just stopped in fact.

My GP and community midwife were unfazed. I actually asked her about it on the second visit and she laughed and said i was not the oldest in her books so chill out. She had 4 preg clients older than me.

I don't feel old at the school gates. To be honest there's such a mix of folk pick up the kids these days, mums, dads, aunts, uncles, child minders, older siblings, grans and grand dads that you don't know who's who anyway half the time! Two of DDs class mates have mums the same age as me give or take a few months.

yes! i had my 3rd at 29 and it said that 🤪

Agree So many grandparents now....and will be even more so next generation if trend continues...are simply not able to give the same support re grandchildren they would have chosen to because they are too old. This trend is creating older parents with young children to look after on the one hand and elderly parents who require support at the other end both at the same time.

Obviously a wind up post…. But you must be living under a rock if you think post 35 is rare.

I had my first at 27 and second at 31 and felt young, a lot in my antenatal class were near or early 40’s.

Just feel like adding that some people can’t help it if they have infertility, loss or don’t meet the right person until later on. Don’t judge.