AIBU to find it incredibly frustrating that there are basically no resources in the UK for people like me?

[Maybeasd]

I’m genuinely starting to wonder whether I’m being unreasonable or whether this is just a massive blind spot in the UK.

I’m a woman, adult, functioning perfectly well in life for the most part, but I’m very cognitively able and have always been. I’ve been properly assessed and this a known entity (I was not born nor raised in the UK for context).

The issue is I’m finding that there are only pathways if you’re struggling but not if you’re just curious. I’m not only talking about the NHS, even privately I haven’t been able to find someone who hits the spot.

I’ve looked into:
ND assessments (very binary, very impairment-focused)
talk therapy - after years of it total waste of time and money.

People in the US suggested to find a neuropsychologist but they have eye-watering costs, mostly framed around brain injury or rehab

It’s either you’re ill or you’re fine, stop asking questions.

I’m not looking for validation, labels, or coping strategies.
I’m just trying to understand how my mind works, and it feels like that’s somehow illegitimate unless I’m suffering.

So… AIBU to find this incredibly annoying?

😁

Have you looked into a sensory needs assessment? A quick google found many results such as this one. Occupational therapists operating privately often undertake additional training in sensory assessments/sensory integration. This one offers an understanding of processing and also coaching.

https://www.griffinot.com/adult-sensory-processing-assessment/

It reads like you find yourself quite unique and that might be why you are not getting what you need/want,

At its core I tend to find people boring (which is common for people like me) but I’m happy to socialise and can go and meet people and chat. It’s always a constant analysis if it’s worthwhile to engage or not.

Do you think that there may be some risks involved in building a narrative about why 'your brain' (which seems to be a distinct entity to 'you'?) is a fascinating subject?

Honestly, I have a - if it ain't broke, don't fiddle with it - perspective when it comes to tinkering with your notion of self.

This just sounds like a big brag 😂

Sounds a bit harsh but gotta say I agree. With such high cognitive ability, it can't be too hard to figure out how to look further into this. But sounds more like OP wants someone official to tell her how fascinating and exceptional her brain is. Honestly, we're all more interested in ourselves than other people are, so yeah, read books, find courses, study away and discuss your findings with your DH.

😂😂

You’re not the only one who doesn’t see any issue needing NHS involvement.

The Psychology doctorate qualification is NHS based with NHS placements so training is focused on NHS treatments. You would need someone who has undertaken or wants to undertake further research - probably in academia - with a view to publishing a paper etc.

Sure they find you fascinating and are devastated to miss out on your chat!

Sorry, but you actually don't sound that switched on. Good luck on your mission, but it's not something that any resources really need diverting towards.

Maybe you need to do a masters degree in autism? Not kidding, they actually exist. Usually aimed at those who want to support autistics in educational environments, e.g. the National Autistic Society runs a Post-graduate Certificate in Autism with Sheffield Hallam University. These courses might provide avenues for the kind of deep dive it sounds like you want.

You are the way you are due to an incredibly complex interplay between your genes, your environment, your experiences plus countless other things.

I can sort of see the attraction of wanting to boil it down to some sort of formula of what exactly has influenced which behaviours to what extent, but it's probably beyond even the experts, and I doubt would be that enlightening.

If you're looking at a more basic level eg "I dont choose to socialise much because I have sensory issues with certain environments" then I'd say that was for therapy to unpick.

I don't think anyone knows the cause of synaesthesia btw - it's fascinating. Several books you can read on it.

What 'triggers'? How do they 'work' - what do they do?

You have to be able to explain what ‘provision’ you think you need, though, and you’re being very unclear here.

If you’re curious about how brains work, why not do a university course on neuroscience? Cambridge seems to do a short course for example for anyone interested.

If you want to understand yourself only, and years of one to one therapy haven’t helped, perhaps the way to use your brain here is to work out/write down what specific questions you want answered - for example to find out more about synaesthesia happens in the brain. Then try to do that necessary research by talking to individual specialists who might know the answers and reading the right books.

But no one just wants to study you, because study has to have some benefit. There is no real answer to “why do I have great abilities and other people don’t?” People’s brains are hugely variable and we are all a magical combination of wild abilities and incredibly shortfalls and everything in between. It’s one of life’s great mysteries.

Agree with others that you are potentially best of asking yourself why you care so much about your abilities. It isn’t troubling you, but it makes you feel different? Do you actually want more stimulus? Are you bored? Are you lacking social outlets?

Basically no resources in the UK for people like you?
Just because you haven't managed to find them, doesn't mean they don't exist. Some good advice on here. Read it and plan your next steps.

You want nhs help because you are curious?

Maybe it’s us who need ‘counseling’ to understand the problem!

I’m not sure that OP is interested in other people’s brains. Just their own.

I haven't read everything but I think wanting an 'explanation' for how your brain works is going to be impossible anyway. How you react to things is a combination of neuroscience, diet, environment, upbringing.... it's not a simple formula that someone can tell you. I can't imagine what anyone would input into this situation that would be of help. You will always find social interactions a bit tricky, you will always find some sensory experiences to be unique to you (as per everyone) and you will work your way through your reactions to them depending on the day.

My daughter is ND (as am I and most of my family) and the therapy and resources we are accessing are to help her adjust to live in a world that isn't always ND friendly. It's not about studying her brain and working out why certain things are so difficult for her (or conversely, why she excels at other things), it's to help her navigate the world while maintaining her own mental health.

Given the proliferation of private provision of therapy/validation/assessment for self absorbed, introspective, navel gazing, financially able individuals I’m surprised you haven’t found someone to assist in your self-exploratory endeavours.

Buy books, start a degree, keep a journal. Maybe look outwards rather than inwards and think of what you can offer society rather than how it can validate your self belief.

I really agree with this.

The systems and services you have tried to engage with are reactive/fire fighting services that support the most vulnerable and those not really functioning

As you are functioning (by your own words, I don't mean that it's fair there's no services that fit you), you're going to have to be self directive about any further self development.

Podcasts, good university libraries (lots allow visitors as day guests), YouTube lectures etc are going to be your best bet for meeting this need.

Wishing you well OP. The world needs more people who are getting to know themselves.

I think the service you're probably looking for is a therapist or coach.

Tamara Russell might be a good one to look into if you're in London or happy to have online appointments.

I agree that you don't need to have an "issue" to look for answers but I do think that it makes sense for it to be self-paid if it's an issue of curiosity, the NHS is for health issues.

Thank you. I thought I was losing my mind. 😂