To be confused as to why hiring a cleaner is seen as an indulgence?

[Gahr]

This is something that I see time and again on this site, and it is SO WEIRD. People seem to think that it is the height of luxury to have a housecleaner, and also seem to be strangely apologetic about it, offering disclaimers as to why they need one. Also, I've noticed that on threads when someone has a problem with their cleaning service, they will get several posts telling them to 'clean their own house'. Nobody would tell someone to 'service their own boiler' or 'fix their own toilet'! I don't understand it at all. I have a cleaner and I wouldn't be without her.

I'm not sure. People prioritise what they can afford. Some people choose not to spend their money that way and then look down on others who do, see the anecdote by a PP about her mother. I have noticed that the people on here who genuinely can't afford it aren't being snotty about it.

100% this! The first thing my nan (who would be in her late 90’s now) used to comment on was the cleanliness of someone’s house or how neat and tidy their kids looked. She was brought up in a block of flats where you would all “scrub the front steps” and if you didn’t, well you was just the talk of the wash house.

Yes, my annual boiler service is neither a luxury nor an indulgence. I'm happy to pay a credited expert.

You speak as if anyone could have a cleaner if only they could "justify the luxury" to themselves. People's problem with your inability to understand could perhaps be summed up as "what fucking planet are you living on to be unable to understand that having a cleaner is an unimaginable luxury for most" HTH 🙄

Mine gets £20 an hour … thats on the cheaper end. I wanted my friends cleaner but shes not taking on new clients as shes fully booked, shes £30 an hour and minimum of 2 hours.

i have a cleaner, i do think its a luxury but one im happy to pay for fortnightly, i cut back on a meal/takeaway a month instead.

I actually enjoy cleaning however we both work DH full time and me x4 a week and i don’t want to spend my days off cleaning when we have busy lives with the kids.

No we aren’t high earners, both public sector salaries (30-37k bracket) just a cleaner is our priority to free up time.

Where I live and amongst people I know, I’d say at least 70% don’t have a cleaner. I’m one of the lucky 30% that does and it’s definitely an indulgence. Both my parents and in laws wouldn’t dream of it but it’s probably partly generational.

Husband is quite embarrassed that we pay a cleaner (solid working class roots) but I tell him it’s either pay or or he steps up and does more and he doesn’t complain any more. We can definitely afford it though.

Because most people can't afford one op ,hope that helps and hasn't burst your bubble to much 🙈🤣

All of the above are luxuries. The difference is that you don’t need training to clean a floor or window as you do service a boiler.

ive never hired a window cleaner - I do it myself. Same with cleaning. And my car. Because I’m comfortable and able to survive but I’m also not going to throw money away at something I’m very able to do

Overall I disagree with what you say you see on Mumsnet regarding cleaners, OP. So I will say YABU.

Ok. That's your opinion. You say it's about priorities. However, I've known what it's like not to have the bus fare for work or to have to sit in the dark because I couldn't feed the meter. It's not always possible to prioritise having a cleaner.
Above visits to a nailbar and having Botox? Definitely.
Above decent food and living standards? No.

Of course its a luxury 😂 but a very important one. Cleaners dont just provide a clean home, they give you more time and improved mental health.

I obviously move in different circles to you op as no one I know has a cleaner, but a lot of people I know (including me) have been cleaners ourselves.

Who are you quoting here?

I was talking specifically about the person whose mother was criticising them for having a cleaner, while herself spending money on Botox.

There’s nothing wrong with having a cleaner but of course in the majority of cases it’s a luxury.

It’s a ‘nice to have’ that eases the load and saves time but if push came to shove and you needed to budget it’s not an essential. Like takeaways or meals out.

Some people will be better/ more thorough than others but cleaning isn’t beyond most people’s ability without any specialist training.

You clearly really appreciate having a cleaner but it’s disingenuous to suggest it would be impossible to manage without. You don’t need to feel guilty about it, just own it - it makes your life easier, you don’t want to do it, you can afford it - what’s the problem.

YANBU having a cleaner.

YAB a bit entitled to think it’s not a luxury.

One thing is for certain: nobody ever ever would say that to a man!

men are not expected to clean their own houses. Which is why i have w cleaner because it would fall
to me otherwise

Sorry, I was quoting someone who said I was 'in a perpetual state of confusion' Very rude.

Mine costs me £35 a month for 2 visits (as share cost with partner)
which is the same as a meal out or 2 takeaways a month.
or the cinema or a haircut etc.
basically any spending over bare minimum can be considered a luxury it seems!

...and I am talking about the economics of having a cleaner, which you claimed was about prioritising expenses.
I'm saying: it's not always possible.
That's all.

Cleaning is something you can do yourself. It’s expensive too, and something you can cut if you need to save money. Of course it’s a luxury. We’ve only been able to afford it in recent months. A lot of things are luxuries, like eating out and holidays.

I'm a size 6-8 lol. No fat jabs required.

I would say 8-10 years ago, all
my friends had cleaners but now I don’t know anyone that does, I can’t afford it so it is a luxury to me. Surely anything not a necessity is a luxury. Doesn’t mean we can’t chose to have luxurys, and some people are going to chose different ones to other, but they are still a luxury

Lollll this is the typical Mumsnet world perspective. FYI not everyone is on a six figure salary and can afford this - sorry to shatter your world view

My cleaner charges £20 an hour! That’s more than I was on when I first qualified as junior barrister.

She doesn’t over charge either, that’s the going rate where we live.

I think you’re BU not so much for the spirit of what you’re saying but the tone of it and the judgy nature of it.
Some consider it a luxury, some a staple household expense.
Live and let live. We’re allowed to think differently, especially as we all have different backgrounds, upbringings and personal circumstances (practical and financial).