I squirted my hungover husband in the face with water

[Hormonallyblessed]

Im 8 weeks pregnant with DC #3 and really struggling with pregnancy sickness, tiredness and headaches - i agreed my DH could go out last night with work colleagues for his leaving do while i picked up DCs, took them swimming, fed and bathed them and put them to bed (and cleaned up then straight to bed myself).
He got back drunk at 1am and didnt get up in the night when 1 DC fell out of bed and then when the other DC needed covers pulled up then later wet themselves. All this i can deal with.
This morning kids wanted to get up at 6am and DH completely refused to get up. Said he wasnt getting up and to leave him alone. I said no way he had to get up with us as im on the verge of vomiting and he needs to be with us to help. He kept refusing. Kids tried to get him up he refused. Told us to fuck off etc. So I took my Evian water bottle and squirted his face and upper back while he was in bed. This made him sit up (he was furious) but he then lay back down so i squirted him again and said id keep doing it until he got up. He did then get up.
I'm not planning to apologise. Was this unreasonable?!

Disagree. They end because a) the trust has been broken somehow
b) usually the man can’t deal/cope with the kids he’s made or has had them too young! (Both can interlink)

You knew he was going out...is staying out till 1 a one off? It was his leaving do!!

I really think you should have left him too it this morning as a one off tbh

From the sounds of it you're both mental! You'll blame pregnancy hormones, he'll blame being hungover.

Does not sound like a nice environment for the kids.

You are both unreasonable.
You for agreeing it was ok to go out then squirting him with water for not getting up.
Him for swearing at you.
What was the pre agreed plans around who was getting up the next day etc?

Why would you even want someone who was drunk at 1am dealing with the DC in the night or getting up at 6am with them.

It wasn't some random night out but his leaving do from your OP. You should have predicted the 1am drunk return and not being able to get up with the kids even if he had agreed to the 6am getting up with the kids.

So you were actually planning to stay up late drinking??

But then you’re saying it’s wrong for OPs DH to do it because apparently you can’t do that when you have kids??

Presumably the teen hadn't been out drinking till 1am on their own leaving do. If they had they wouldn't have been going to school, would they?

I agree which is why OP never should have thought it was a good idea for him to wake up and parent his kids after less than 5 hours sleep.

She is BVU and I’m glad that you agree on that.

So you are totally fine with your partner squirting water over you because you are not complying with their request, and all because you think the request is reasonable? Ok then.

You're honour, my girlfriend caught me cheating and threw a milkshake over my head. THAT'S ASSAULT! I want her charged!
Yeah, good luck getting any cop to take tipping a milkshake on someone's head or squirting them with water as 'assault'. I feel embarrassed for you. Try educating yourself before posting. 🤡

God this is a right bloody shit show from all around and on all levels.
If he’s a shit husband don’t be with him, and don’t have even more children with him; nothing gives you an excuse for being abusive.

Imagine you replace ‘squirted with a water bottle’ with spat at, or punched. Granted, squirting with a bottle isnt quite as severe but it’s still malicious, and abusive.

Er...... Wow, you are some nasty person. Firstly you 'agreed/allowed' him to go out on his leaving doo? How nice of you, he must have been very grateful that you allowed him to go out.
People have a drink when celebrating, nothing wrong with that. So he got in at 1am, went to sleep. After 5 hours kip with no doubt a well deserved hangover, you verbally and physically assault him then wonder why he told you to fuck off?

You have issues OP.

If the roles were reversed, peeps on here would be telling you to leave the bastard, take him for everything you can, get your ducks in a row etc.

Controlling and coercive behaviour rings a bell too.

Your first port of call should be to realise YOU were the catalyst in this situation, I think more than a apology is required for assaulting your hubby.

Feeling rather sorry the poor sod had to deal with this, are you abusive often to your hubby?

A responsible adult is capable of going out and make sure he can look after his children and pregnant wife in the morning.
Dont make excuses, its not ok to get this drunk.

Put simply, OP, you have two people struggling with sickness, tiredness and headaches. One because they're pregnant, the other because they got themselves pissed. I'm assuming you both felt equally rotten. But you have DC who need immediate care and attention which at least one has to provide. Mumsnetters are by and large defending the one who got themselves pissed.

Did you read the part where I said I work for the police. I have charged people with common assault before. It does happen….. do you not feel silly saying that to someone that does that for their job? 😂😂😂😂😂 again - embarrassing.

Yep, it is assault. Wish I had known that in a previous dreadful relationship when my 'D'P threw water over me in bed, soaking both me and the sheets, pillows and mattress. It was awful.

LOL you need to educate yourself before posting, have a google. you can be charged with assault for throwing a milkshake over someone or repeatedly squirting water at someone

but you are probably that person who thinks they can throw whatever they want at people and get away with it because they are female.

FYI I think that poster who works for the police knows far far more than you do

PutTheScrewInTheTuna · Today 10:58
God this is a right bloody shit show from all around and on all levels.
If he’s a shit husband don’t be with him, and don’t have even more children with him; nothing gives you an excuse for being abusive.*
Imagine you replace ‘squirted with a water bottle’ with spat at, or punched. Granted, squirting with a bottle isnt quite as severe but it’s still malicious, and abusive.
Totally this. Op you sound like you’re dealing with a lot and your house is out of control. Now wasn’t the time for him to step up but in general if you need him to step up you both need to talk rationally, he needs to not use language like this in your house(kids shouldn’t hear their dad tell their mum to fuck off), and he needs to be fully in with all the kids. Your kids will be the ones that suffer if you both continue to be these parents.

Going out, even for a leaving do, doesn't mean getting drunk so severly that he is abusive in the morning. Let's have some standards.

He is an adult with 2,5 children. OP covered evening and night, but she is close to vomiting in the morning, so he can't take that time off as well.

Really sorry to hear that 😢 hope you’re doing better now. It’s abusive behaviour and unacceptable x

Yeah, sure you do. And you randomly waste taxpayer's money and charge girls/women with tipping milkshakes/water/drinks in people's faces? Sure. Pull the other one.

👏🏻!!

No, I didn't address the assault. I addressed the point that the request was reasonable. The DH failed to adjust his behaviour to meet the responsibilities resulting from his involvement in creating several pregnancies.

He went out on his leaving do (which you agreed to), was drinking and didn’t get in til 1am. Of course he wasn’t going to be up dealing with the kids in the night or at 6am to start the day.

If I agreed to my partner going out on his leaving do, I’d know to not expect any input with the children til later today, and we’re all entitled to a night out. If you knew you wouldn’t be able to handle the kids due to pregnancy sickness, then you should have talked about that, and he either didn’t go out, agreed not to drink, get home earlier etc, but it doesn’t sound like you did any of that. You agreed he could go, then acted abusively.

You aren’t the first woman to be pregnant and cope with sickness. You were out of line to do what you did. Obviously he shouldn’t tell you to fuck off, especially for the children to hear, but really what did you expect when you did what you did.

Presuming he is usually a good partner, then you should have just dealt with the children and left him to sleep it off. And if he’s not a good partner, why have another baby? It sounds like a shit show and I feel for the children.

What police officer is going to right the reason for charge: "tipped milkshake over plantiff's head".

FFS. Even if it's technically assault, no constable worth their salt is going to even bother with that charge.

I didn’t mention milkshake. You did. Again - stop embarrassing yourself when you know NOTHING, clearly! Maybe ask a cop when you see them next, or better still.. commit the crime and find out for yourself 🤡🤡