Partner doesn’t shower enough

[anonymous73181921]

my partner doesn’t shower often enough, I mean he can go days without showering and putting clean boxers on,
I’ve mention it so many times but his excuse is he doesn’t have time as he has the gym then work but there is time and I just lost it today and told him he’s being lazy and it’s off putting cos he smells.
he thinks I shouldn’t have called him lazy cos he really doesn’t have time but he does have plenty time.

Made me laugh outloud. I agree

Oh God, I’m not a very sweaty person so I can get away with missing a shower occasionally If I’m pressed for time, but if your partner is going to the gym regularly he NEEDS to shower after the gym at least, it’s none negotiable. His colleagues must think he stinks.

Why does he think it’s ok to go to work after the gym without a shower? It takes 10 minutes!!
You need to ask him why without shaming. If the conversation gets nowhere, I’d leave him.

He's not even showering for you babe.....

definitely if you don’t laugh kind of laugh and we do but I didn’t know the extent of the no showering brushing teeth

If he doesn't respect himself or you enough to shower, then no amount of "doing anything for you" would outweigh this. It is enough to give anyone the ikk..And as for the teeth, gum disease and halitosis too???

Presumably you’re not sharing a bed with this guy because that would be so so gross

Why doesn’t he shower after the gym though at least? He would only need to leave the house ten minutes earlier to achieve it. What exactly is stopping him? Is he getting enough sleep?

There's not a thing he wouldn't do for you.. other than respect your request for a basic level of personal hygiene.

He's not So Loving, because he doesn't brush his teeth or wash himself more than a couple of times a week by the sound of it at best, and if he loved and respected you he wouldn't want you to have to live with a man who was a filthy git.

Which is what he is. He is lazy, and doesn't respect himself, or you. If you find that appealing then go for it.

"there's not a thing he wouldn’t do for me" this is the most basic hygiene there is, clean showered body, fresh underwear and clean teeth. I feel sick just thinking about how bad he must smell.

I couldn't stay with him, all the good he does would never outweigh the not showering.

Dh is at the gym every morning, showers when he is there.

doesn't have time he says I’ve asked as he will do it sometimes like on days off work and yeah he does about 8/9 hrs a night

uggh no, but he’s only getting away with it because you let him. Only you can change the situation but you have to mean it. And follow through leaving him, if it doesn’t change. Once he realises you are serious, then it depends on how he values your relationship.

Now that you do know the extent of how diabolical his self-care is, just know that there is nothing unreasonable about refusing to continue to be in a relationship with this stinky child. Don't be manipulated into thinking otherwise.

If he huffs and puffs about having to clean himself (and by clean, we're not talking a quick rinse, it has to be the full body clean, with soap, everywhere... EVERYWHERE on the regular, eg daily, particularly if the weather is hot or he's been to the gym) then this is an indication he will try and swerve it if he thinks he can get away with it.

I think he's a lost cause. He's a whole grown ass man who expects a woman to shag him and complains when you don't, despite his stink breath and crusty knob.

Honestly, I stand downwind of people like him in supermarket queues and wonder who the hell hasn't told them they smell. It's mindblowing. Your bedroom must absolutely honk OP, how do you live with him?!

Is this some kind of sick joke?

There's not a thing he wouldn't do for you?

Are you mad? The man is disrespecting you on THE most basic level

There's not a thing he wouldn't do for you? Jesus Christ. 🤡🤡

Not to make excuses for him but could he be neurodivergent and have sensory issues ?

How can you bear to kiss him?

Raise your bar. 4 year olds avoid bath time and brushing their teeth not grown adults.

This is just utterly disgusting, please leave the filthy bastard, when women stay with men like this it signals their vile standards are actually ok, it's not it's disrespectful and rude.
Stop rewarding sub par males like this with relationships and sex, stop it.

I bet people at work have noticed he smells and they probably talk about him behind his back. Tell him that and keep telling him he stinks, until it sinks in and he gets the message.

Sorry but you just need to leave/ kick him out. This relationship is over.

YABU to stay with this skanky bloke.

He gets sweaty in the gym and doesn’t shower 🤮

How do you sleep with him when he’s grubby? Honestly imo showering daily is the bare minimum

I’m not surprised he stinks going days without showing and going to the gym

it takes literally 5 mins to have a shower, how can he claim he doesn’t have time?

So fundamentally he's a filthy so and so. I'd have to move out and end it.

Why are you with him?

He is disgusting and disrespecting you on a very basic level

It would be a deal breaker for me.
It takes 2 minutes to shower in the gym if you want to have a quick shower and have short hair.
I spend a lot longer but if I am in a massive hurry I can shower in two minutes.