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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want to rehome my dog

192 replies

Ubah · 20/01/2026 10:33

Please read before judging as I know a lot of people adore their dogs. I love my dog too but I think for his sake it would be better to rehome him. I work full time far from home so he is alone all day every day. I spend a few hours in the evening with him and when I go to bed he whines until I get up and sit on the couch with him again. This can go on all night so he is obviously having separation anxiety or something like that. Also he has the house absolutely ruined from weeing all the time. I don’t give out to him I just clean it up but my house is beginning to stink from him. I’m wrecked when I get home from work and in the morning facing a long journey and cleaning up after his night and day of peeing on everything is just too much. I think he deserves a home where he is in company most of the day and lives with someone who can take him out during the day. There are no dog walkers in my area so I can’t avail of that service. I can’t let him out the back while I’m away as I live on a main road and he would get knocked down. Also my teenager, 14 year old, doesn’t want me to rehome him even though she rarely interacts with him and spends every second week with her dad anyway. She doesn’t clean up after him but she just has a kind heart. I do love my little dog but I really think he needs something more than I can give him. He’s ten now and so may only have a few more years. Am I bad for thinking about rehoming him? Thanks for reading

OP posts:
Pinkbluegreeb · 20/01/2026 13:39

Ubah · 20/01/2026 10:40

From about 7 in the morning til 7 in the evening. It’s horrible I know but I don’t want him being knocked down by a car as the cars fly on this road

Leaving your dog on its own for 12 hours a day is disgusting and shocking. You should be ashamed of yourself.

At a very minimum you should be walking the dog before and after work. Letting the dog upstairs when you do to bed since you ditch it all day and leave it on its own.

There is no chance that there is no dog walkers at all in your area, you just dont want to pay for it and you are too lazy to look properly.

Mama2many73 · 20/01/2026 13:48

I think the options are you and dd work together to improve his life ie walking and interacting with him after school, and you do the rest , or you rehome him.

At the end of the day its what is best for him, not what you or your dd wants. Hes 10 he needs comfort and companionship not neglect.

Applespearsandpeaches · 20/01/2026 13:49

Cherrytree86 · 20/01/2026 12:57

Could you not give up your job, OP, to stay home with your dog? @Ubah

Please tell me you’re joking.

Cherrytree86 · 20/01/2026 14:44

Applespearsandpeaches · 20/01/2026 13:49

Please tell me you’re joking.

@Applespearsandpeaches

im joking, yes! Who on earth would actually seriously think a person should give up their job to stay home with a dog?? 😂

BuckChuckets · 20/01/2026 17:26

Ubah · 20/01/2026 10:44

Thank you. I have asked my teenager to help out and she says she will but never does. I know I will be judged by my family as they are such dog lovers and that has actually put me off doing something before now

Don't they judge you for leaving the poor thing locked in the house alone all day (and most of the night when you're asleep)?

Uhghg · 20/01/2026 17:45

Pinkbluegreeb · 20/01/2026 13:39

Leaving your dog on its own for 12 hours a day is disgusting and shocking. You should be ashamed of yourself.

At a very minimum you should be walking the dog before and after work. Letting the dog upstairs when you do to bed since you ditch it all day and leave it on its own.

There is no chance that there is no dog walkers at all in your area, you just dont want to pay for it and you are too lazy to look properly.

Yes she should be walking her dog before and after work but it’s unfair to judge her for leaving the dog all day.

She has acknowledged that it is cruel but apart from giving it up (which is what she’s planning on doing), she can’t help that her situation has changed.

There are were no available dog walkers in my area when I tried to get one and I looked for months.
OP likely also does not have the money for any dog day care considering her situation has recently changed.

Ihateboris · 20/01/2026 18:11

Whereabouts are you? I know a few people in my area who can't commit to a dog full-time, but would love to walk other people's dogs.

Ihateboris · 20/01/2026 18:12

Could you register with "BorrowMyDoggy"?

monty2020 · 20/01/2026 18:14

At the age of 14 your daughter should be able to take the dog out for a short walk. No wonder shelters are full and many dogs don’t get their forever home . Don’t believe for one minute there’s no dog walkers in your area .

SassyCrab · 20/01/2026 18:17

I’m in a very similar situation myself, I feel so bad as I’ve had him since a puppy and rescued from Romania, but since becoming a single parent to my 2 year old I just haven’t got the time for my dog anymore & due to that he misbehaves, toilets everywhere & it’s putting more pressure onto me. I defo think in this situation, rehoming will be the best option just be careful how you do it.

BornSlippie · 20/01/2026 18:19

There are no dog walkers ?

WiddlinDiddlin · 20/01/2026 18:22

You're not being unreasonable to consider rehoming home however there are steps you can take to improve things until that can happen.

You would be unreasonable to expect him to go into a kennels based rescue/shelter though. They're not nice places, even the plushest, nicest run options, will be very stressful for a dog.

  • Have him sleep in your room. That instantly ups the amount of time he has with company by a good 7+ hours.
  • See if there is any local person, teenager etc, who would come and let him out a couple of times during the day for cash. You might even get them to sit in with him and watch tv/use the internet. If you don't ask, stick a card in the shop window, ask on a local FB group, you don't know. Whilst a professional with all the insurance would be better if they don't exist in your area, then they don't.
  • Find a rescue that will support you rehoming directly from your home - lots of smaller independent rescues do this, so they will help to advertise him, and find potential homers, they may even do home checks and transport, but he stays with you until that home is found. If the home falls through, they provide the back up so he does not come back to you.

If he is toilet trained when you are actually at home you could look at building an indoor toilet area. To do this, get a puppy pen so you can separate it from teh rest of whatever room it is in, ideally..

Find a mechanics drip tray - amazon have these, they're available in a variety of sizes and are wide, shallow trays that are much bigger than a cat litter tray. Find one that fits the pen size if you're using one.

Line this with either disposable pads or washable ones (washable ones are around teh same price for 4 as a large pack of disposable ones costs!) - then cover that with some fake turf (washable in the shower/bath/hose outside, whatever option you have there).

Then spend some time over a weekend taking him to this area and rewarding him well for toileting there. And then hope that whilst you are out, he chooses to use this area. You may get lucky, if he is only toileting indoors bcause he has no choice, he might well.

Decent rescues are full up, they always are, and have waiting lists. Beware the temptation of selling him in the free ads or giving him away, people do use those to source free/cheap dogs for nasty purposes unfortunately.

ElsieMc · 20/01/2026 18:24

I took on two dogs from a situation similar to yours. The owner had split with her partner and went back to work fulltime. She found it hard to let go and did prevaricate but you have to go with your decision, stick to it and do it now.

Dont listen to others who have not stepped in to help you.

Its best to look for a breed specific rescue who can assess your dog giving an improved chance of a good rehome.

Ours was a successful rehome but it wasnt easy for us and the dogs who lost their home through no fault of their own.

Tulipsriver · 20/01/2026 18:24

It sounds like a tough situation all around. What breed is he? Have you spoken to rescues about his likelihood at being rehomed or even fostered? Some breeds are far more likely to get a new home.

If he was stuck in kennels for a long time it would likely be worse than being in the house alone all day. Many dogs really struggle, especially if they already have separation anxiety.

If he can't be placed in a family quickly, could you see if any local teens would visit him at home, for a bit of money, instead of rehoming (providing he's not likely to bite). Or see if any of your dog loving family would take him in?

FromTheBlock · 20/01/2026 18:28

OP is in Ireland and I can well believe that there are no dog walkers there.

I am a dog walker in England and my DP is from the west coast of Ireland, in a rural community. I’ve looked into whether or not I’d be able to set up as a business there if we moved over, and there really wouldn’t be a demand for it. It’s quite a cultural difference in how dogs in rural Ireland live - they spend a lot of their time outside (DP thinks I’m cruel for having my dogs in the house 🤣), and you certainly wouldn’t take your dog with you if you went to the pub. There’s no rule against it, but it just doesn’t happen, as DP says it would be frowned upon! Also properties are so spread out there that even if there was a demand for dog walking (which I don’t think there really is), there would be so much driving between jobs I don’t think it would be financially viable.

So I can well believe there are no dog walkers nearby. I’m sure it’s different in big towns and cities but not rurally.

Yes OP rehoming the dog would be the kindest thing to do.

ARingtoit · 20/01/2026 18:31

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take him to a proper rehoming centre and do not sell him. I dread to think what could end up happening to him if you sell him cheaply on some website. It sounds like a difficult situation so get him to a decent charity ASAP and stop letting him suffer.

Climbingrosexx · 20/01/2026 18:32

You have to think about how much he means to you and how much you would like to keep him. Dog walkers seem to be everywhere now so I'm sure if you look hard enough you could find one, if not what about day care? Can you not get home during your lunch to give him a quick walk? If you don't feel any of that is an option then maybe rehoming is the only way. I think it's heartbreaking but he is 10yrs old and without generalising maybe a retired person could give him the lovely life and company he deserves.

No judgement from me though, I was in a similar situation many years ago and I was considering rehoming my dog, selfishly I suppose I just couldn't part with her but eventually things changed for me and she ended up with lots of company and a lovely life without me having to give her up. If you don't see change on the horizon then rehoming is probably best but do it responsibly through a reputable rescue.

However you decide to move forward, please don't allow him to spend his final years lonely and anxious without the enrichment he needs and deserves.

WhatATimeToBeAlive · 20/01/2026 18:35

Christ, please re-home this poor dog, but as others have said go to a proper rescue. He must be so distressed, no wonder he's peeing in the house being left for so long.

raspberrieswithchocolate · 20/01/2026 18:49

@Ubah I think you should rehome your dog, given the circumstances. It's the best thing for him so long as you rehome him properly through a reputable rescue. Please, please don't rehome him by advertising for a new home or giving him away to someone who tells you they'd like a dog, etc. Who knows where he'd eventually end up, he could really suffer.

A rescue will do checks and find the most suitable home for your dog so he can live out the rest of his days happy and comfortable. The rescue will understand why you need to rehome, your current circumstances aren't at all suitable for your dog as he needs company, mental stimulation and exercise. Giving him to a good rescue to rehome is one last way you can show your love for him. I'm sorry you have to do this but I really think it's in his best interest.

caringcarer · 20/01/2026 18:53

Why don't you get a dog walker to walk your dog mid morning and spend an hour with dog? Why doesn't your teen walk your dog after school? Why are you neglecting your dog?

Isit2026yet · 20/01/2026 18:55

@Ubah it’s harder to rehome an older dog. Insist your teenager does more with him. Being home alone got 12 hours is better than being in a kennel alone for 23 hours at 10 years old.

SeaShellsSanctuary1 · 20/01/2026 19:05

Please rehome your dog. While not on purpose it is being extremely neglectful.

Circumstances have changed but you still have the responsibility to make the correct decision.

Jumpingthruhoops · 20/01/2026 19:05

YorksMa · 20/01/2026 11:05

Said with compassion, not judgement... I am a dog lover and have always had rescue dogs. I'm the kind of person who puts dogs first once you've made a commitment to them. BUT, if you really can't look after your dog, you have no choice but to rehome them - the current situation is cruel and neglectful, even though that is clearly not your intention. I would just say PLEASE do not do 'free to a good home' - those dogs often end up in very, very bad places and well-meaning owners have been conned many times. Contact a reputable rescue, such as Dogs Trust or, given your dog's age, Oldies Club. There may be a wait - rescues are overwhelmed - but that sounds like the best bet for your poor dog. And ignore what family members say, including your teenager. You took this dog on and you owe it a decent life.

You took this dog on and you owe it a decent life.

This! 👏👏 As it stands, this poor dog IS being neglected. Re-homing would be best thing for him - but I'd be doing everything I could before this was necessary. Poor boy.

fruitbrewhaha · 20/01/2026 19:07

I’d judge you for not rehoming this poor dog. He sounds desperately unhappy. Let him go.

lightnesspixie · 20/01/2026 19:09

Please rehome this poor sad lonely dog he deserves a life too! Sorry but this makes me so annoyed.