To want to rehome my dog

[Ubah]

Please read before judging as I know a lot of people adore their dogs. I love my dog too but I think for his sake it would be better to rehome him. I work full time far from home so he is alone all day every day. I spend a few hours in the evening with him and when I go to bed he whines until I get up and sit on the couch with him again. This can go on all night so he is obviously having separation anxiety or something like that. Also he has the house absolutely ruined from weeing all the time. I don’t give out to him I just clean it up but my house is beginning to stink from him. I’m wrecked when I get home from work and in the morning facing a long journey and cleaning up after his night and day of peeing on everything is just too much. I think he deserves a home where he is in company most of the day and lives with someone who can take him out during the day. There are no dog walkers in my area so I can’t avail of that service. I can’t let him out the back while I’m away as I live on a main road and he would get knocked down. Also my teenager, 14 year old, doesn’t want me to rehome him even though she rarely interacts with him and spends every second week with her dad anyway. She doesn’t clean up after him but she just has a kind heart. I do love my little dog but I really think he needs something more than I can give him. He’s ten now and so may only have a few more years. Am I bad for thinking about rehoming him? Thanks for reading

Life changes to be fair to both of you it seems the responsible thing to do. However at 10 he will be hard to rehome. Have you looked at dog walking services or even the site ‘borrow my doggy’ for volunteer dog walkers near you who may be able to break up his day.

You absolutely have to do something. This situation is really cruel. No wonder he is weeing in the house. Either your dog loving family need to step up, or you need to find him a new home.

What breed is he? Is he generally well trained? Is he good with kids? All these things will impact how easy it is to rehome him.

There will be dog walkers in your area. But I don't think paying someone to walk him for an hour a day will solve the problem.

It sounds like he's on his own for at least 20 hours a day. And never walked. That's no life for a dog.

Will any of your family members take him? If not, contact a breed specific rescue.

If there are genuinely no dog walkers near you, is there a doggy daycare near your work?

Sadly you are right in that you need to re-home your dog. Find a good rescue and let them find the dog a new home. My neighbours foster for a rescue. They have had a succession of lovely dogs, all of which go on to great new families. Many have been given up due to relationship breakdown. My dog is also a re-home and I am still in touch with his previous owner. It's really sad for you but it's the right thing to do.

Your poor dog is left alone for 12 hours a day, then spends an hour or so with you and then is alone again all night. Jesus.

Im not normally an advocate for people rehoming their dogs but in this case I’d say it’s in the best interests of the poor dog. He deserves a home who will love him and spend time with him. He must be so sad and lonely.

We all know there are dog walkers everywhere. OPs situation is beyond dog walkers. This is a traumatised dog that needs rehoming ASAP as a PP has said. This is an emergency.

OP, don’t even have another discussion with your kind hearted DD, just do it. Get the ball rolling today and keep us updated please.

You will get trounced on here, but the dogs well being is what is important!

Near us there is a dog day care where they pick up the dog, take it with other dogs to run around a secure site and bring it back. We don’t use the service as DH home based, but it’s great for people in your situation. Depending on your needs dog can be out of the house 3 to 6 hours. I would look into something like that. Is there anyway you can WFH any days of the week? In your shoes I would be up walking the dog before work no matter my commute. I would also stop access to phone, pocket money etc for DC if they didn’t walk dog. What time do they leave for school? Could they walk dog before school? If dog was walked and alone from 08.00-16.30 that would be bad enough but better than current life.

I can fully understand you feeling like rehoming him would be the best option and it sounds like it would be. My only concern is his age, it could be hard for him to get a new home at that age.
Something has definitely got to change though and if there's absolutely no way you can give him a better life yourself, then rehoming him probably would be the kindest things to do. Being alone all day every day for that length of time just isn't fair at all and if it's something he's wasn't originally used to, I'm not surprised he's struggling.
You say your family are dog lovers, would none of them being willing to take him? Or even help out through the day with him?

Said with compassion, not judgement... I am a dog lover and have always had rescue dogs. I'm the kind of person who puts dogs first once you've made a commitment to them. BUT, if you really can't look after your dog, you have no choice but to rehome them - the current situation is cruel and neglectful, even though that is clearly not your intention. I would just say PLEASE do not do 'free to a good home' - those dogs often end up in very, very bad places and well-meaning owners have been conned many times. Contact a reputable rescue, such as Dogs Trust or, given your dog's age, Oldies Club. There may be a wait - rescues are overwhelmed - but that sounds like the best bet for your poor dog. And ignore what family members say, including your teenager. You took this dog on and you owe it a decent life.

Also an excellent suggestion

Would a 10yr old dog get rehomed though?

It's a terrible situation. I always have two dogs so they are company for each other when I go out, but I am in a lucky situation that I work from home every afternoon and I have full days working from home too.

I too live in the middle of nowhere, and there are dog walkers everywhere. I am sure there must be someone. Are you on NextDoor? I am on my local one, and there are dog sitters / walkers aplenty.

I agree it is probably gone too far, i was just reacting to there is no dog walkers comment which irritated me a little bit.

Yes you must re-home him. It’s cruel the way he’s living now and I have experience of teenagers not doing their bit to help but objecting to re-homing. My (now adult) daughter has very recently re-homed her dog due to changes in her life that were unlikely to alter in the future. She was heartbroken but her dog is now living with someone who is home all day and gets to spend every day running around and playing with other dogs. They also send her videos so that she can see that she’s made the right decision. I’m sure your dog will settle quickly with somebody who is home a lot and can give him all he needs. Don’t feel guilty or let anyone guilt trip you as it’s the right decision for your dog and you.

https://www.oldies.org.uk/ - Oldies Club is a small, foster-based rescue that specialises in finding new homes for older dogs. No dog should be left alone for that long, sorry - they are social animals and he must be desperately unhappy.

Can he not sleep in the bedroom with you to save you going down to the sofa?
And yes doggy day care, my friend used that for her 2 dogs when we were in the office a lot more.

OP is a single parent, I doubt she has the money to fork out hundreds of pounds a month for doggy daycare, or she’d have looked at that option already. It isn’t a child’s responsibility to take care of a dog her parents chose to get - and as DD spends some weeks living with her dad, it wouldn’t be a solution even if she was willing to do more when she was around. Life circumstances change, and this dog has separation anxiety and needs a home where somebody can consistently be around to give it a dog-friendly routine.

@Ubah i would 100% rehome in your situation

don't let what others think or their potential judgment stop you

we had to rehome ours, and were very worried about what everyone would say or think. But the dog is in a better place with a better life, and as soon as she was gone the stress, the weight of it all just lifted

and a few years on everyone has forgotten about it!

Dont get me wrong, i cried many tears over the dog. It's hard, letting them go. But if they will be better off, and you, don't hesitate

Are you saying that your only options are trying to rehome an ageing dog with SA and house training issues or leaving it outside all day? Rescues are crammed at the moment. Why would your dog get run over if it was outside?

You need to rehome the dog and as soon as possible. Having done this myself for different reasons, I know it is a hard decision. Its harder to be the dog though. You dont need judging, you need support to see this through.

Don't leave it another day.

Thank you for making those points I was just about to come on and say the same thing. I don’t know if people have read my replies to other posters or not but I wasn’t working full time when I got my dog. A few years ago I separated from my ex and had to move to a different area. I lived at my other address for 20 years so knew a lot of people there. I don’t know anyone here and I have actually enquired about dog walkers and day care even though as a now single parent I can’t afford it but i have looked into it. I live in a small rural place in the south of Ireland and I have been told there is no day care of any kind for dogs in the area. As @ComtesseDeSpair said my teenager is with her dad every second week about an hour from where I live and when she is here we are on the road to activities and sports and god knows what else when we are not working or in school. I hope that clears up a few questions. Thanks

Excellent advice. Never rehome a dog by advertising on social media.

Why make up stories? What is the point of lying.

I think rehoming is probably the answer. However as the dog is 10 realistically they will be hard to rehome.

I’ll be honest I feel bad for you OP but I think if you’re rehoming you owe it to your dog to try and find them a home with someone you know (doesn’t have to be local) so they don’t end up stuck in kennels or going to some random on socials which is truly heartbreaking and extremely distressing at this age.

If you haven’t a full check up at the vets bloods etc to ensure weeeing and night crying isn’t also medical please do that asap.

In the short term while looking fur a home Id also be working to try and get the dog weeing on puppy pads and have a basket in my room for them on a night to avoid the separation crying.

There are foster organisations for older dogs, some are breed specific some not like a pp linked.