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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to call of my wedding...

283 replies

SmallShips · 12/06/2008 22:58

As my partner has pooed himself in public, infront of his work mates, after one too many. I am revolted, absolutely revolted..

OP posts:
Seashell71 · 13/06/2008 00:12

I grant you a drunken elf with shit in his pants is different to a woman opening her back-passage whilst giving birth !

But if you love him you accept that even at that time, which was probably the lowest in his life, when he felt the most like a loser and very pathetic, you'll stll love him for all the other times that he's your perfect man [pass the bucket emoticon].

buntyjajas · 13/06/2008 00:14

"Pissed in the pub dressed as an elf"! That sentance has me wiping away tears of mirth and what a vision to go to bed with !

fawkeoff · 13/06/2008 00:15

ROFL.....im actually crying with laughter reading this thread....me thinks we should buy you a poop scoop for a wedding gift

Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:16

but how do you get past the... i know what you did, you pooed in a pub, as an elf, infront of people, i will have to make polite conversation with on my wedding day... thoughts

OP posts:
Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:16

lol (and cry) at poop scoop

OP posts:
fawkeoff · 13/06/2008 00:17

you do know that its going to be brought up in the best mans speech dont you........the entire wedding party will know he shat in an elf costume ROFL

Seashell71 · 13/06/2008 00:18

BTW would you have preferred if on his stag night he'd slept with a prostitute instead? I'll take the drunken-incontinent-elf option anytime...

madamez · 13/06/2008 00:18

It is of course quite possible that what his mates will send you will be a picture of your DH with a mars bar shoved down his pants, because after a few pints they have all got to the stage of 'Let's wind up our DPs with some poo humour'. (Either that or the streets of portsmouth are full of shitting elves tonight) Some men people think this kind of thing is funny.

And actually so do I

Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:18

christmas will never be the same again, how can i take the kids to see santa and his merry elves?

OP posts:
Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:22

im actually not sure if it is his stag do,it was going to be, but got put back, as alot of his friends are on deployment, it was supposed to be a work meeting,(with stag do after)though why you would go dressed as elf is beyond me.

OP posts:
Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:23

im too afraid to look at the picture, to see if it is infact a mars bar.

OP posts:
SmugColditz · 13/06/2008 00:29

Post it we will tell you.

chunkychips · 13/06/2008 00:29

ha ha if it was my dp (which it usually is) it would raise an eyebrow, but not much more. If he followed through, then it's got to be a dodgy stomach, although you should never trust a fart.

wrinklytum · 13/06/2008 00:32

just read this thread and am crying with laughter....

Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:36

he has been known to joke about following through after farting and having to go wipe, now im not so sure they were jokes, i am painting a lovely picture here arent i?

OP posts:
madamez · 13/06/2008 00:37

Look, if this is not a wind up by the MN Poo-Mad Troll again, then I think the OP is very very probably being wound up by either her DP or his pals.
Having said that I have frequently been grossed out by the play food at toddler groups, as some varieties of plastic 'spaghetti sauce' do look a lot like someone's DC is not as potty-trained as they claimed.

Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:38

well i am off to bed, i assume hes passed out in a pooey puddle somewhere. I shall update in the a.m.

OP posts:
wrinklytum · 13/06/2008 00:39

I have spent most of the evening cleaning up *hit of various types,so carry on.Am used to it lol.Have you opened the picture???

Original poster
SmallShips · 13/06/2008 00:39

oh how i wish i was trolling!

OP posts:
wrinklytum · 13/06/2008 00:42

Hope he finds his way home safely.Still giggling at this thread,night Small Ships

MrsJohnCusack · 13/06/2008 01:22

one too many?? one brewery too many maybe

seriously though, it can happen. it's happened to me (through stomach upsets rather than alchohol though). But if he's drunk a lot more alchohol than he's used to it could seriously irritate his stomach

or it could be a wind up by his mates

bamamama · 13/06/2008 01:33

Thank you for making me really laugh Mrs-of-the-shitting-elf.

Please let us know what happens

Weegiemum · 13/06/2008 03:22

I'm visiting my brother in portsmouth on holiday soon.

I will be on the lookout for poo-ridden elves.

do I want to go now???

bossybritches · 13/06/2008 06:54

Update SS? Did you look at the photo???!

naughtynoonoo · 13/06/2008 07:04

Can you imagine at Christmas going to santa and the elves - "uhmm have you farted?" - of no not again! Just be prepared to have a lot of peep looking at his arse as he walks you down the aisle, shame when they should be focusing on you - hope you have a lovely day regardless, I am sure you won't call of the wedding and he is a lovely man really, maybe you could get him a nappy as a pressie! Bet after the reception your car wont have tin cans on, but nappies!