To be fed up of bossy two year old

[beingbossedabout]

Will probably regret starting this thread as toddler threads here often go mental but my two year olds bossy behaviour is really getting on my nerves. It started with just being ordered to ‘sit there mummy’ and it’s evolved to dragging me around, taking a finger and pulling me, trying to shove me down on the sofa if I need to get up, and getting very irate when I don’t do as I am told, it’s tedious as hell. When does it end?

Just to add she’s delightful in most other respects.

When does it end?

About 5 years old IME. I know, it sucks.

I mean it might get slightly, gradually better before then.

But I still feel like I'm at the mercy of two unreasonable bosses tbh

I know that feeling! She was literally trying to drag me out of a shop today 😕😕

I often hear these tiny tyrants out and about and can't quite believe the sound and fury coming from such small beings, lol. (Sorry, not helpful)

Just tell her off then! She needs to understand she can't keep ordering you around

My almost 2 year old is the same but I try and say things like “mummy will sit there in a minute” or “we will leave but just let me look at this first” or something to be a yes answer but with a caveat which means she will forget by the time she’s had to wait 30 seconds for it to happen. Could that work?

Yes I’d just ignore her/him

Haha, I feel this. My youngest daughter is 2 and a half. She's a little tyrant. Gorgeous, but a tyrant. As I write this, I can hear her bossing my husband around.

I’m sure she will and she is told to wait, no, mummy doesn’t want to do that and so on, but ultimately at the moment she doesn’t care what I want.

This is really normal toddler behaviour but also really annoying!

There's no good telling off a two year old for developmentally normal behaviour. Of course OP can set limits and say no (and nowhere in her post does it suggest she doesn't) but telling her off is wrongheaded.

Can’t relate to this! You just need to set boundaries. I’ve seen the other end & it’s not as cute etc when they are older.

If you push back consistently this is how she will learn to care.

Really annoying 😂

It really doesn’t work like that. Think about the most caring, loving and selfless person you know; you think they got like that because their mother refused to sit where she was told when they were two?

Perhaps. She will learn not to command you around though won't she?

Do you actually do as you are told?

My DD2 is a future dictator also. I find it incredibly funny and draining in equal measure. I like to compromise like you said, mammy will do that in 2 minutes, when you've put your shoes on I will do X etc.

It seems to be improving slightly over the past couple of months! 🤞 Except now sometimes when I ask her to do something she says 'I'll do that in 2 minutes mama' and carries on with her thing 🤣

Sorry, I should have been more specific. I didn't mean that it would turn her into "the most caring, loving and selfless person", I meant it would teach her to care that you have your own needs and desires and cannot be commanded or dragged around all the time, against your will.

lol. Spoiled little madams your fault

I don’t think you understand toddlers very well, and this is what I mean about MN threads about toddlers going weird.

If you have a six month old baby, and carry them everywhere or use a pushchair / carrier, will they ‘never learn to walk because you’re enabling them?’ That would be really stupid, right? They start walking when they developmentally can.

Obviously we need to encourage good manners and good behaviour but the dictator stage is very normal, as tedious as it is to be living in Franco’s Spain just at the moment.

I would also go the 'I'll do that in a minute, I'm just doing/sitting here/eating this/watching this first' route. Just a quick plea not to tell her that she's being bossy. It used to be my mum's favourite phrase to say to me 'don't be so bossy'. It would enrage me completely because I WASN'T being bossy - not in my head anyway!

She’s still a darned sight nicer than you are.

I doubt she’d fully understand anyway. She does have to be told, although I am saying not now so much I keep wanting to add ‘Bernard’ after it, for those who know the book.

You think ?