...to wish DD's boyfriend wasn't so good looking?

[ItWasntMeOnTheCounter]

DD and her boyfriend are both 17. They've been together for about a year, and are completely smitten - adore each other, have really compatible senses of humour, just "get" each other, etc. They are each other's first partners. I really like BF - he's kind, open and sweet.

BF is good looking in a way which tends to get really noticed - he's been approached repeatedly by modelling agencies, and recently he's been considering whether he should sign up to one. DD very supportive of whatever he wants to do, of course.

Anyway... I can't help worrying and thinking that very good looking males tend to portend heartache. AIBU to think it's possibly going to make things really hard on the relationship? I'm not intending to do DD down with this post - she's beautiful, and she's clever, and funny, and generally fantastic. But looks have never been much of a "thing" in our family - generally, we're quite ordinary looking (although I think DD much better looking than DH or I ever were) and talents lie elsewhere.

I know it's really unusual that a relationship is for the long run anyway at 17, so feel mildly ridiculous writing this post, but they're both currently so serious about the relationship and DD wants and considers it to be the "real thing". Also - DH and I met at 15 and are still together 30 years later, so....

AIBU to worry about it?!

I think it'sore that she's worried about him being constantly hit on or approached. People can put attractive men on pedestals.

FWIW which is nothing, my ds 21 is gorgeous, always been very popular with girls, but his 2 previous serious girlfriends broke up with him, and he’s been with his now gf for 3 yrs. Y ABU, but I understand your concerns.

fgs he’s her boyfriend not her ‘partner’ and this is nonsense. Personalities are as varied as looks.

Ugly men are just as horrible as frequently as good looking ones

🙄 all of these posters saying that this is a weird thing for OP be thinking about. It's actually very normal. Looks are the first thing people notice about you. They are the first most interesting thing about you, the personality second. Attractive people get noticed, talked about, gossiped about (both positively and negatively), treated differently (again, positively and negatively), get away with murder with their opposite sex contemporaries, get let off with things that less attractive people would be sacked for and get hired purely on the basis of being attractive (no matter how stupid or useless they are). Everyone wonders and makes assumptions about their dating and sex lives, even if they know nothing/aren't even privy to it. Everything they do creates a buzz, no matter how mundane. Wherever they are, everyone else will be. They get invited to everything despite actually being dull. They always have very possesive/protective hangers on/would-be gfs/bfs friends around them and practically cock block any man/woman who tries to approach him/her. I'm sorry but I've never met a single attractive person who hasn't had all of this, even if they're boring/stupid af. Trust me, everyone will be talking about OP's DD's relationship and attempting to interfere.

How lovely for your daughter. Just be happy for them! I don’t think you need to worry about it, lots of men are heartbreakers, lots are keepers. If she’s going to have a boyfriend she adores, good for her that he’s also amazingly good looking!

Sorry, but why on earth do so many women feel the need to kick the s* out of any other woman who expresses the slightest doubt about anything? I thought sisters were meant to stick together?

The thread may or may not be strange, but the original post isn't strange in the slightest. Anyone with 33.3% of a brain can see what OP is getting at

From one protective mum to another… This post really shows you care and many comments are not looking at it the same way. I take it as let them love. As you have said the likely hood is, it will run its course and for what ever reason they will go their separate ways. Let them experience this together what ever it is. You have been blessed with your husband and never had the teen break up that you can’t go on, only to find the next fish in the sea. Encourage every experience for your daughter and her partner. Either way in many years to come they will have nothing but good memories. Broken hearted or not. Not everyone is lucky to have a good first boyfriend. Iv heard nightmares! He sounds like he is setting the bar high for whoever next comes along and that’s not a bad thing.

@op explains her feelings really well and is grounded / humble. I think the strange comment is yours for being so dismissive and abrupt.

I wouldn’t ever tell your daughter how you feel and it sounds unhinged tbf.

What were you doing at 17 ? I wasn’t thinking about long term with the bloke I was with then. Were you ?

It sounds like their feelings run much deeper than looks.

I understand where you are coming from. But try not to worry OP they are only 17. It sounds like your daughter is really pretty too so maybe his parents are equally worried!

OP is your daughter secure in herself? Then it shouldn’t really be an issue.
The reason I bring this up, is I went out with a very good looking lad as a young woman. He got so much attention from girls (and guys. All the guys thought he was cool). It was like going out with a celebrity. He was actually quite shy and got embarrassed if I complimented him.
Anyway going out, women would literally throw themselves at him (with me there). I was very insecure and always thought he would leave me. I hated the attention he got. It would cause massive rows as I always suspected he preferred these other girls.
Anyway that was my issue and that’s why I bring it up. Hope your daughter is secure and the attention doesn’t bother her.

Yours is another strange comment.

Op is not my "sister".

In my experience it’s the men who tend to be ‘alright looking’ but graced with the ‘gift of the gab’ and over-inflated ego that have done most of the heartbreaking in my life.

Absolute opposite of what I've seen in life- the less attractive men are the ones likely to get their heads turned when they get attention as they're not used to it.

Sorry that was to OP- I agree with @couldthisbe2501 too

I’m surprised how many moms worry about their children’s love lives - even when they’re seemingky going well, they find potential issues like the partner is too good looking! 🤦🏻‍♀️

DD is still a teenager and quite possibly she may have (and herself be the cause of) many heartbreaks yet which is honestly very normal for majority of people who don’t marry and have the rest of their lives with their first love.

On the plus side OP must have a great and not stressful life if she has time to fret about such non issues!

They’re 17. The chances of them still being together in 5 years time are quite low. And that hasn’t absolutely nothing to do with what they look like.

I put YABU because they’re 17. Just let them do their thing. It’s lovely that despite being good looking, he’s not arrogant like a lot of good looking men are.

I hope you think your daughter is drop dead gorgeous though and a massive catch??

If it helps OP my son (student) works as a runway model and looks striking. He is, as far as I know, a faithful and respectful man. He's certainly isn't a player, more of a serial monogamist.
Also, despite enjoying being surrounded by beautiful women at shoots it's the men who hit on him because many male models are gay 😂

My gorgeous looking bf that I had at seventeen broke up with me because we weren't right for each other. I think I boosted his ego a bit but actually he got together with someone else and they're still married 25 years on.

Apparently my DH is also incredibly good looking but I remember him when he wasn't 😂 so only see him through love.