New puppy...

[Doggynono]

I am not a dog person never have been...DP loves dogs all four kids love dogs. I am allergic to dogs some I can tolerate. Anyway they all went on and on DP told me for the kids childhood we should get them a dog I caved. He promised he would do everything with the dog. We got a 'hypoallergenic' breed I went and visited without taking antihistamine twice and all was fine. Anyway we're a week into having the new puppy and my allergies are flaring up. I just feel crap with them sore eyes, sneezing, a little bit wheezing thankfully no rashes. I'm trying not to be round her too much as I feel miserable have been taking 2 antihistamines a day but they aren't doing much. DP is raging at me he keeps throwing me dirty looks when I sneeze so there is no way I can say about Rehoming. He's also huffing about having to sleep downstairs with the dog while we crate train but again he was the one who wanted the dog not me. Plus I don't want to do that on the kids and dog.

any tips on what I can do here? Do hepa air purifiers work? I hoover, mop and damp wipe every day and she isn't allowed upstairs

You are compromising your health and your long-term well-being, because they want to pet.
Your husband is a c*

Your doctor can give you antihistamines that are really strong. I think they are like 10 times the dose of the over the counter ones. They work for me and cats.

This is ridiculous. Quite frankly, why on earth did you cave? Boundaries should exist! "No, because I'm allergic" is an extremely justifiable reason for not owning a dog.
FFS.
Also, your DH is a twat.

We have family with this breed. I wouldn’t say that’s hypoallergenic. That’s a lot of hair and they do shed!

Should have got either a hairless dog or a cat instead; Siamese or bengals are hypoallergenic.

What Hoover do you have? My daughter has allergies and we found dyson’s filters put dust back into the environment whereas a shark absorbs so removing more allergens.

You can get spray that takes down allergens in the house, it’s pet safe. I spray it around liberally every now and then, I have flareups of allergy with our very fluffy cat but with an air filter and the spray and occasional fenofexadine I’m fine

Our dog is crate trained and he loves it. Its his little space where he feels safe and can go if hes had enough of us. The door is open on it most of the time.

I believe crates are cruel.
Weve had dogs for almost 50yrs now, they’ve had their own bed to be in whenever they wanted. The children weren’t allowed to pester dogs if in their beds & weren’t allowed to stop a dog from accessing its bed.
With any body, the bones only grow because the body is exercised, the demands put on the bones by the muscles during exercise makes the bones grow. I don’t believe caged animals grow in a normal way.
If you think of people in comas in hospital all have their bodies exercised to try to maintain muscle & bone mass & tone.

She isn’t going to be hypoallergenic, no dog is truly hypoallergenic and she has cocker spaniel in her.
It’s too late for me to bemoan the lack of research (I have worked for years in the animal care sector, rescue and private) but you really should have just stuck with a poodle and would have probably paid less.
I have a rule in my house that I only agree to any pet based on the fact that I’m happy to provide full care because I know, as usual everyone may lose interest and I get left to look after it.
Your allergy will hopefully settle as you get used to her to some extent, my sister isn’t as allergic to my cat as she is others.
Keep the dog from going upstairs, an air filter, filter for your hoover and I would make sure you have plenty of air circulation.
I have friends who have dogs who are allergic to them but they still choose to have them, they take antihistamines.
We are a multi dog household and love our dogs, I believe that they are super beneficial for the children in terms of learning responsibility, empathy and kindness.
Our eldest children and oldest dog have grown up together and she has been there for them at the end of the days when friends have been unkind, exams tricky and childhood ailments have made them
feel rubbish dispensing a waggy tail and hugs regardless.
Now she is in her senior years they are learning a whole new dimension where her needs need to be considered before their own. All our dogs bar one have been rescued as young/older adults and our children have been fully included in their rehabilitation and training.
OP only keep your pup if you’re heart is truly in it, if it isn’t she needs to be returned to her breeder ( who should never have sold her as hypoallergenic or crossed two cross breeds together to produce a mongrel and then probably charged a fortune for her, but that’s an entirely different thread altogether!)

It’s still a sensible option though to return to the breeder and tell them the issue.

a good breeder should accept the dog back.

You tried, you need to point out how distressed you are about it not working out so the family are well aware how it is affecting you and how sad you are about the fact it’s going to be a health problem for you that isn’t going to go away.

Doesn't sound as if dog comes from good breeder (what decent breeder crosses crossbreeds?) so this will be non starter.

So your husband works shifts and has bought a dog relying on the fact that you will do all the care for the dog during the day. He will swan in at night and the dog will have had everything done for it possibly including all it's walks so he can just come in and play with it. That is not dog ownership. He also doesn't seem to care that you are unwell not to even make the slightest effort to minimise the effects of the dog by changing his PJ's.

I'd re-home him and the puppy

This is a good point. My parents have the shark and it’s great and I love my Dyson but have gone for the pet pro one as I heard similar about Dyson stand up. I would always go for a non stand up model - they are bulkier and harder to store but have much better suction

No way would I have given in and got a dog in your situation
You will be living on medication, frantically cleaning, bathing the dog and changing your clothes for the next 15 years.

As for what he said to you about paying him back?.. I have no words!

There's absolutely no way a 'breeder' who charged £800 for a mix of those breeds and sold a dog over Christmas is taking this dog back.

Returning to the breeder is of course a sensible choice when they have come from someone who sees the dog as more than a paycheck. In this situation it's an unrealistic option because the breeder wont want her back.

I know from personal experience how awful pet hair allergy can be. In my case it was caused by a cat (bizarrely I was fine with his brother). Skin rashes, sneezing, streaming eyes, the whole works. I did eventually become immune to him, took ages but ultimately I didn't react to him at all. It you can bare it, small doses of exposure may result in things getting better over time.

Your 'D'P is a knob.

I can't help wondering if he wants to keep you occupied and with your health compromised OP so that he can get away with more.
He sounds like a horrible bully.

Can this be real? You got a dog knowing you are allergic to them and are now complaining that you have allergy symptoms. Your husband wanted a dog but is now complaining about the work involved. You seem to have done very little research on any of it. If it’s real, there are no words apart from poor dog. Humans are really disappointing.

I would love to keep her so hearing I might develop immunity to her is good.

the last few days I have realised this is my dog even the kids like a quick play but asking them to stand outside and let me know if she pees the odd time seems to hard for them
to do (while im
buay doing something else btw not just sitting watching tv)

Whilst I agree that your husband is being unreasonable, that is a sepárate issue and you need a clear head to think that through. I am also allergic to dogs, but I love them and chose this.

We have a Samsung air purifier in the bedroom (only around 75£ on Amazon), no dog upstairs, and I use cetirizine daily. Be aware that over the counter antihistamines can be useful for different things, loratadine for example is the only thing that helps my other allergies, but doesn’t touch the pet allergy. In B&M they sell the blue ones and the green ones, one is loratadine and one is cetirizine, both are very cheap. Try the one you’re not using! You can also now get fexofenadine over the counter.

I also use HayMax, which is kind of like expensive Vaseline from Holland & Barrett. I put it on my eyelashes and under my nose and it ‘catches’ allergens. I have been doing this for years and I think it works but I haven’t tried it without my other changes so can’t say that it works empirically. You could try Vaseline though?

Also time helps, my allergies to our puppy were so bad in the first few weeks even with all my prep (I have had dogs all my life), but now it’s much better.

I hope you feel better!

Sorry to be harsh but you seem determined to be walked all over. A dog requires everyone to step up and noone in your family seems to be prepared for the responsibility.

Your partner paid £800 for a mongrel! You can add being a gullible idiot to his long list of failings.

Your seeming acceptance that you’d have to pay him back the cost of the dog if it’s re-homed is the most troubling aspect of this situation. A decent man would not make such a controlling demand. He’s a shit.

The breeder should take her back and refund if they are a reputable breeder. I also agree with others that you could have a dog which has almost zero poodle in because it a second degree cross, so it could be as non allergenic as any normal dog.

OP, TCM might help with your allergy. My mum did this to help with her very strong hayfever and she got fully rid of it - 20 years ago and it has not returned! But if you decide to try that, make sure it is a genuine place. The place my mum went to was part of a local hospital. The therapy consisted of acupuncture and drinking specially created herbal teas for about 3 or 4 months.